Hi all,

My toilet has been stopped up since 2:45 p.m yesterday. When I spoke with the owner's son about it yesterday all he said was he wasn't on the grounds. He said I'd have to keep plunging it. The owner's son who is the maintenance man ignored me twice today around 10 a.m. when I asked him to fix my toliet. He just kept walking when I saw him outside and didn't even aknowledge what I had said. I can't take this anymore and feel like I'll end up snapping on someone sooner or later. I am waiting on The Poverty for Law to call me back hopefully this afternoon so I won't be able to get back online from 1 p.m. till 5 p.m. in case they call. I can not receive calls while I'm online.

I can't believe that my sister is not calling me just because she doesn't want to apologize to me. I need her but she's like the rest of my family and is only concerned with her needs.

My next door neighbor whom I've had the trouble with came outside when I had gotten upset about my toilet and got her brother to fix it. She told me yesterday that the other people here have been starting stuff between her and I on purpose. Her daughter told her yesterday not to talk to me when she wanted to let me know I left a bag of groceries outside. She didn't listen though and we talked and I hugged her cause she was crying about the whole mess. So that is one good thing I don't have the stress from fighting with her.

barbara

Barb, you can't make your sister into someone she isn't. It just doesn't work. As much as you would like a close relationship with her, she just doesn't seem to be the type. You may just have to let go of those feelings. You have tried and tried. She just doesn't have it to give.

What good news about your neighbor! Take it slow. Baby steps in friendship. That was nice of her to get her brother to help and the groceries. It's a wonderful start. I can imagine how that stress is less about about that!

Keep thinking about the good. Let that fill you up. They may seem small, but more will happen.

Oh Barbara, I am so sorry your landlord is being neglectful over taking care of your toilet, sounds like it needs a snaking to open up the piping. Is plunging still working? I will keep you in my prayers hun, glad to hear about the neighbor too, but like Curious I agree, baby steps, go slow with the friendship so as to not risk misunderstandings or something like that.

is that the neighbor you have complaint filed against... the one who was threatening you? or a different neighbor?



i'm sorry about your half-sister... sometimes people seem like they can or want to give more and then it turns out they just aren't up to it. and that hurts. coz usually when we find out is right when we need them. it has happened to me. i can appreciate how it must feel so isolating too when she is your only family, essentially.

i hope gradually perhaps you can come to understand what her limitations are. then, if you can accept them, you will be able to align your hopes and expectations of her and still have a pleasant rapport, even if it is less close than you would have liked. it takes some time for the hurt to heal though. take your time. it isn't her fault but it isn't your fault either. we all need people. it's human.

thank goodness for the toilet being fixed.


~ waves ~

Dear Barbara,

I'm glad that the toilet got fixed and that your neighbor and you had a hug.
M.

Thanks all. I've called my doctor to let her know I need an increase in my blood pressure medicine. She hasn't called back yet.

Waves, yes the next door neighbor is the same one who threatened me and I have a case against.

Curious, I have tried and tried with my sister.

The one thing I had a therapist tell me many years ago was not to waste time on relationships, like with my sis, that didn't reciprocate and allow for time to find and nurture ones that are. I'm just hurt and let down by my sis but actually I have been much better off without her. I've been more productive and now have more time to cultivate new and maybe better friendships. She was becoming a burden to me more than helping me.

I feel better for writing that.

I'll check back after 5 p.m. EST after the business offices close and then I won't be missing my business calls.

Barbara

Barb

I'm glad the neighbor's son was helpful. Also glad she let you know
about the groceries. Just be careful.

Donna

Thank you Donna. I will have to be more careful too cause my next door neighbor came over yesterday when her brother was here also. She seemed intent on telling me that I am better off when I just stay home away from everyone else. She of course did not acknowledge what she had done to me and that those she hangs around are the ones who instigates stuff between her and I. I am going to have to have an excuse for the next time she wants to come over to visit and if she does happen to come into my home I'm going to have to have an excuse to boot her out soon.

barbara

sounds like she likes to be a part of the "drama".

Those drama queens can really tire a person out- with all the gossip and lies and busybody stuff they create.

Take care

Befuddled,
Be very careful with these people.

Take care of yourself.
M.