[Isis]

Does therapy really work?
I don’t mean for the kind where one needs to be working through present issues, - like I need to see a therapist to spew out my frustration with my daughter’s behaviour, she is being treated for OCD (obsessive, compulsive disorder) with an anti-depressant and has gone hypo-manic.
I mean for some of terrible things that may have happened in the past.

I started to write a blog about a series of events that caused me misery when I was a child. It would have been a textbook detailing of a child’s emotional and then sexual abuse by irresponsible, insensitive relatives who were unfortunately the guardians of the child after the mother died of cancer.
Except for one-liners to state the incidents to my psychiatrist so that he was aware in case he ever needed to take them into consideration to prescribe my medications, I have never mentioned the details to anyone.
People perceive me as an optimistic and emotionally strong person and depend on me as a sounding board when they are in a bind. I have never wanted anybody to feel sorry for me. So I have never spoken to anyone.
Since I am writing my blog under a moniker I thought I’d write about those days, but I just couldn’t handle it. I was miserable and had to stop as I felt I could spiral into a depression.
IT WAS FRIGHTENING.
My memory is shot. Much of the details of those times I have forgotten completely. I seem to have always dealt with the unpleasant in life by sweeping those events well under the carpet. As a result I have lost years of my life, but very possibly coped better. My optimism is part of my spirit, but it has caused me much of my memory.
It’s the preferable trade off.

[bizi]

I am sorry that you endured abuse from the past. Therapists have different trains of thought about how we deal with the past. If sharing about these past issues is not helping you then perhaps you are not benefiting from doing it. If you are functioning well in life, you get to decide what things you want to review.
perhaps you could journal these things then have a burning ceromony where you burn the past, that is very cleansing. Maybe you could find one friend that you could be with you while you burn the past. YOu could just ask her to be there for you and not evern tell her what it was about, just that you needed to get rid of them and start refreshed and have some closure.
This sounds like a hard time for you right now.
keep posting....we are reading.
((((HUGS))))
bizi
above all , do what I really makes you feel better.

[Mari]

Dear Isis,

Not having memory or energy for the past has helped me in recent years. It works out better than way.

I did lots of therapy when I was in my 20s. And a little bit when I started with my current tdoc. But now we are dealing with the present.
The present is quite enough.

Originally Posted by Isis

My memory is shot. Much of the details of those times I have forgotten completely. I seem to have always dealt with the unpleasant in life by sweeping those events well under the carpet. As a result I have lost years of my life, but very possibly coped better. My optimism is part of my spirit, but it has caused me much of my memory.
It’s the preferable trade off.

You're right in that we make (or circumstances dictate that we make) a trade off.

I'm looking at day to day and week to week right now.

I do pray for my future.

M.

[Hockey]

I think this is a really interesting question. Sorry that I don't have an answer, but I do have more related questions.

I'm not sure that talking can "cure" anybody when the emotional problems may just be the symptoms of an underlying organic condition. For example, before my brain injury, I didn't suffer from depression, panic attacks, etc... Now, I've got all that is spades. It would appear these issues are physical (structural and chemical changes in my battered brain) as opposed to emotional.

That said, I do think that talk therapy can be useful for helping us cope with the fallout from our symptoms in our daily lives. If our psychiatric problems are longstanding, looking at the past might give us insights into our current behavior (triggers, etc...) that might help us cope.

The one thing I am sure of is that those of us with "mental health issues" would get better and more compassionate medical care if our conditions were acknowledged to be as physical as asthma or cancer. Nobody chides the asthmatic who starts wheezing during a marathon for a failure of character.

Cheers

[waves]

Dear Isis,

Many children who have suffered violence have memory gaps... some lose detail, some blank out entire months or years. it is a defense mechanism against trauma and can happen in adulthood for acute events as well.

Clearly it is bothering you as you find yourself wanting to write about it - perhaps it is starting to creep up on you now for any of a number of reasons.... triggers you may not be aware of, or conversely an emergent desire for personal growth... could be anything.

With everything you already have to deal with i can't say if going full throttle into specific therapy is the best thing here ... yes there is a trade-off. you may ultimately gain even more than you bargained for... but to get there you may face more pain than you bargained for. only you can decide.

one thing i could suggest is, go one step further with your therapist: discuss the "to delve or to leave buried" question. spend a session on that alone. perhaps she can provide some general information as to what "delving" might entail therapy-wise, and help you gain insight on what you want to do.



~ waves ~