This is the 2nd time this week, I had to call 911 due to her falling from drinking.
Tonight they came and checked her out, then I gave her something to eat, her meds, soda, got her on the commode and she fell off it hit her head on the bedstand, then I tried to get her up and she hit her head on the side of the bed, so I had to call back 911, she is in route to the hospital.

I am going to have to get her in someplace for depression/detox after tomorrow. This can't keep happening.

I knew the crew from my assault, they are real nice, asked if I was ok, and what I was going to do tonight, they said to get some rest. They know from my assault that I am BP and have a plate and screws in my neck and not strong enough to lift my mom.

So, here I am alone with my dogs, having a soda, just thinking, I am so tired of so much.

Sorry, had to vent. Love and Hugs, Nikko

{{{Nikko}}}

I hope things will turn for the better with your mom.

befuddled2

Sending you some hugs Nikko

Hoping tomorrow is brighter.

Donna

OHHHH NIKKO!

all I can say is that you are such a good daughter, can care taker to your mom.
You have been so patient with her...have put up with alot as well...
it will be so nice to see how your mom is after detox....
hugs to you dear
((((HUGS)))
bizi
hoping that you can really rest well tonight....

(((((((((( Nikko ))))))))))

sounds like you could use some Rainbow Roses about now...

i think of you every day. i pray things will take a positive turn. hold on.

love and huggs and bestest wishes

~ waves ~

p.s. i will have ADSL in a few weeks.

here i go again. I am so happy you have your beloved animals. I don't think you are doing your mother a service by keeping her with you. She loves you dearly and you might be committing a sin by slowly killing yourself being her caretaker. She would be so much safer in a home...Her soul would be so much safer if you allowed yourself a life. You are martrying(sp) yourself and it isn't working. You need to work on your self esteem...You are finally free of your husband...you need to be free of your mother's demands and just be a source of love for her. You could benefit so much by playing more with your beloved companions and start having the time to make new friends and focus on your own needs. I went through such a depression when my alienated mother died and I felt the bottom of my world fall out...I no longer had somebody to take care of and it was so painful for me to grasp the reality that I had never taken care of myself nor had I ever had anybody take care of me. The latter was probably the most painful of the emotions and the one I had been dodging all my life. Shortly there after I found a sick starling and rescued him. I called him Little Jude. He brought so much joy into my life.
He died to the year my mother died. It was so weird. Then I finally began to start trying to take care of myself. It started out being the loneliest process of my life.
Bobby

Nikko-

I don't know what to say, except I think detox/facility for rehab for drinking is the best place. Most are a 30 day stay for rehab. She is going to have to become willing to stop drinking because she is falling down, etc..some people never want to quit. And it is so hard. I hope you can get her for help, and I hope she wants to stop?? Either way, I hope you can get through this, hugs, nuttybutty

I just called the hospital, they kept her in the ER and are running some more tests. She is sleeping. They are going to call me back, I assume as to what is going to happen now.

Probably a social worker or a p-doc will call me, I don't know.

I doubt she will agree to go to a detox place, maybe a place for depression though. After that I don't know about a nursing facility, she doesn't like those places after she was in a Assisted Living place for a short time after her almost year in the hospital for the stroke, seizures, heart attack and depression, etc, and I found out they were giving her someone else's thyroid med.

So, I think it is going to be one of those days!!!! I am going to wait to hear from the hospital, because I am not running over there to sit and wait, and God only knows if my mom is ****** off at me for calling 911.

She is killing herself slowly with alcohol and doesn't seem to care, I think she has just given up.

Anyway, I wish I could just go back to sleep, this is all just pulling me right back down.

Hugs, Nikko

Hi, Nikko ... I apologize for not knowing you, but I just started reading some of your posts this week. It was just in this thread that I discovered you are female!

But I see that you must not be a member of Al-Anon and so want to urge you to look for the meetings closest to you and attend. There you will find the best support and advice for dealing with an alcholic family member - as well as learn how the children of alcoholics all have so many of the same problems in common. This is, surprisingly, a positive thing - to discover a group who can so relate to you and your struggles.

Of course she won't (voluntarily) go to ANY place where people won't be providing her booze whenever she demands it. If she can't get on and off the toilet chair without falling, how does she get out to the liquor store buy the booze where she lives now? Who carries the bottles into the bedroom for her? Is it her husband? As long as she is enabled at home, she will stay at home.

Of course she's ****** off -- there's no booze in the ER. Unfortunately, alcohol almost never kills as quickly as one would think. She may still be around for 10 years. Longer? Who knows. But will you still be there, cleaning her up and helping her back to bed?

Well, at least thryroid wouldn't hurt her in the tiny doses perscribed. So, you REMOVED her from assisted living for that nursing error? Is there anyway you can get her back in? At home, being allowed to be drunk, she needs more than assisted living - she seems nursing home material. But dried out, she may still qualify for assisted living.

At least you know you would know that it is a good idea to review her med chart periodically. Actually, the nursing supervisor, knowing that her chart will be reviewed, is going to get down on her nurses to not mess up with any patients.

Very understandable. The only way this will ever change is if YOU change. Change what you expect of life and for yourself ... and stop enabling your mother and family.

Your mother would NOT EVER BENEFIT from detox as long a she can demand booze when she gets back home. Detox does NOT get rid of addictions. Ever. It doesn't work like that. It merely gets MOTIVATED people sober enough to attend AA meetings and group sessions while they are inpatient. It gives them a chance to THINK about being sober.

The only way you can treat her alcoholism is to get her out of the house and back into a facility. But what would your life be like then? Sometimes it is the changes it would mean to our own lives that keep us from changing our circumstances.

I hope very much that you get the phone book out and look for AlAnon (or Al-Anon) in the black and white pages. If you can't find them, look for AA (or Alcoholics Anonymous) - the meetings are often at the same place, just different times and/or meeting rooms. You will get a world of help. After decades, they are still the first recommendations of Ann Landers and Dear Abby. There is no cost to join or attend meetings, even if they pass around "a collection plate" - they know many will not put in more than coins or a few dollars .. and that some have no disposable income.

apologizing for the tough love...
Teri

Hi,
I understand completely what you are saying about tough love. I grew up with an alcholic father who died at 48 from it.
I think I have been every route with him then.
I am an only child, so it makes it difficult. I can change the circumstances as to where she lives if she agree's, but I cannot change her. I learned that a long time ago.
I only have medical power of attorney if she is unable to speak for herself.
I am going to try everything in my power.
There is alcohol in the house, and if I don't get it, she will try to drive and get it herself, which she can't do. Then I have to live in hell for not getting it for her. It's not an easy road that I am on. I feel like I am reliving the past. I already suffer from PSTD from my assault and now this reminds me of my father.
I have been to Al-Anon and AA meetings with her in the past. She is 73 and is set in her ways. Getting her around and outdoors is a major ordeal with her walker and all.
I guess today will tell. I still haven't heard back from the hospital.

Thanks for the advice and understanding.

Hugs, Nikko