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Another day at the doctors and hospital
X-rays and a CT scan of the lungs
Let all be well Heavenly Father Before the test My appointment with the oncologist It has been since January 9, 2012 Both my breasts were taken off Cut away Lucky to have found it so early and had them removed was I able to bypass chemotherapy and radiation I am still on the cancer drug tamoxifen was unable to handle femra scared I am Still When you know your body so well It is hard Me |
My walk to the hospital
Backed up is the diagnosis
While I had a appointment to get a CT scan and X-ray I had a appointment with my oncologist several blocks away Attempting to walk it I became winded heaviness center of chest nausea lump in throat lightheaded Wound up in the ER IN THE END My heart was not the problem I am backed up Now I go every morning Not like it was before the meds changed everything I am severely backed up As gross as that sounds Relieved I am Given a type of drink available OTC once a month And then a prescribed medicine Don't have name available as my child has my paperwork and script Amazed I was Was prayed upon And at the end of the day My children came Not the circumstances I would have chosen I will not question my Father Grateful I am Me |
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I am sorry to see this so late. ( have not been very active on the forums during the summer.) How distressing to wind up in the ER on the way to the oncologist. That is stress on top of stress. I hope you eventually got to all your appts and tests and heard all good news. Certainly good news that your ER visit was not heart related so that was a good start. My best, Diandra p.s. I also could not handle Femara, actually have not been able to handle any of the anti hormone meds. I hope you don't suffer too many side effects from Tamo. |
had my annual ultrasound
january 12th 2012 my anniversary of my double mastectomy
why ultra sound it is the best way to get a reading after removal still have another two years to be on my cancer pill i found my lump it grew in eight months from my last mammo a hard core believer of preventive health care especially with my babies point all is clear nodes clear this a good thing i am having problems as per my recent eye exam retina specialist ASAP retina in left eye is detaching and fluid and gases are being released around the entire eye my middle sister two years ago or so woke up virtually blind in one eye identical problem they put a belt like mechanism to hold it together the other eye in much worse situation im left to wonder on 911 my family literally were exposed to the plume of debris all the things that is happening to me my children my sisters we live a mile and a half from the devastation could we be getting ill because of what was in the air for such a long period of time who knows there is something going on something but nodes clear thumbs up God Bless get you mammogram touch yourself under your arms your shoulders neck be well love me |
My menses stopped at fifty
I turn 56 in a few days
Have a first in the morning with my oncologist And directly to my OBGYN after I started to bleed Scared I am Me |
my oncologist
has me stop tamoxifen
and will see obgyn tomorrow at 4:45 to rule out ovarian cancer still bleeding it is red in color today i am ready to remove all my woman parts including my ovaries too much to deal with one moment at a time so *ucking tired literally sweet Jesus hold me tight me p.s. script for blood work from oncologist LUNGS KIDNEY CBC CEA DX BREAST CANCER |
5 years is the minimum time
it will be 5 years that i am on tamoxifen
it would be sad to have put my body through being on that medicine never missed a day to have been physically and mentally drained from the side affects and almost to the date i begin to bleed at the 5 year mark had two more years to go the bleeding has increased since yesterday fire engine red different from yesterday if my veins are behaving as they are pictures to provide the doctor who to say i'm not bleeding internally so baby sister in tow to hold my hand my pap smear was less than a year ago if there should be cancer polyps a tumor anything of that nature i was early in finding it this being a big plus i am ready to have everything removed what to expect now having stopped tamoxifen as i felt different three days before i started to spot whatever will be will be the future is ours to see k sera sera what will be will be me |
it hurt like hell
but a biopsy was given
the blood work with biopsy will be on edge prayers my Father hold me it is tough and scary me |
There is little I can say Eva other than you are in my prayers. Know that you are loved and respected. :hug::hug:
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More than I could ask for
In prayer
I pray for the women who carry on Keep pushing forward In prayer For women who suffer just on a hormonal level In prayer For women who's doctors do not listen to the In prayer for all as I be a tiny spec who wants more than anything To understand ones own body As only I know what I feel I just need someone to really listen In prayer May my story help just one person Your prayer is forever welcomed In Jesus name Amen |
Not feeling any better
Sixth day
Still bleeding Not feeling myself Light headed My hormones Changing again Changes again A uncomfortable feeling Me |
Sending love & hugs. Benign fibroids or polyps I pray.
I bleed on occasion, rather strange really seeing as I had the total hysterectomy in 2001. Last time was in 2012 when I was under extreme stress and I think looking back the medication I was on contributed. I spoke to a GP & a specialist about it. They didn't seem to care at all. Endometriosis terminology bandied around, except I know for a fact I never had endo, it was recorded on my notes only the once by the surgeon in the UK who botched my hysterectomy, nicked the bowel twice and failed to provide adequate care. My gynea who I had for 25 years in Aus swears I never had endo and subsequent blood tests etc support that. Quote:
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Two d&c back to back
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Endometriosis found Again at 49 Endometriosis worse I had begun my changes Period would go on for two weeks at a time 14 days of heavy bleeding The at 50 it just stopped At 51 had my double mastectomy And began tamoxifen Prayers that it all be benign So tired of doctors Can't afford it all Yet I still go Medical bills just keep piling up Thanks Any info is better than none Sending those prayers Love Me |
Still bleeding
Just not feeling good all around
Waiting for results My nerves on fire Me |
Sending hugs :hug::hug:
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woke up to a bleed
3 fold
seeing oncologist first thing in the morning i haven't been feel myself scared i am asking Jesus Christ to hold me tight two more days will be two weeks of bleed results of blood work should be in PT PTT (CLOTTING) CBC CEA (OVARIAN CANCER TEST I know I have to hang on just another addition to my overflowing plate taking it one moment at a time all in the hands of Heavenly Father and my doctors scared me |
I took action
Rewards from Heavenly Father
All results came in All negative I'm good Just need to find out why veins blow and then bruise It starts with a sharp pain But having a bleed after 6 years Clear of ovarian cancer My kidney liver and so on good CBC great Vaginal biopsy neg for endometriosis I PUMPED OUT A PERIOD AT THE AGE OF FIFTY SIX SIX YEARS AFTER IT STOPPED A PERIOD still bleeding cramps are there A sweat before the onset It was hard to decipher Cancer has the same side affects Nausea weak irritable no appetite Dropped twenty pounds Out of nowhere So it was oh what a relief Thanked my Jesus for holding me together Pay close attention to your body Before a period My breast would hurt But I don't have them anymore Blessed So relieved Me |
I'm relieved to read this news Eva, perhaps it was a polyp or fibroid, I'm told it happens from time to time if you still have a uterus. stay strong, keep your iron levels up, breathe the fresh air and thank God xxx
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Singing I am
Hold on to Heavenly Father ever so tightly
Dancing As I was gifted throughout the entire day Good news on top good news Blessings on top of one another Oh how I'm told to keep calm Eva I'm singing And lessons taken Thank you for the support It was a period Yes all is there In hindsight I had two days of sweats before the onset of the bleed A norm when I had my menses Still singing Love Me Sending feel good moments |
Something new
Behind my right balloon I am experiencing pain
Mammo due shortly Won’t go away We shall see We shall see Me |
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Eva, Keep holding on to our Heavenly Father.....He knows you have much to do. |
It is a fear
What I’m feeling under my right arm pit and behind the balloon just doesn’t feel normal
My appointment with my oncologist is end of February and and I gym March If the pain under my arm pit doesn’t subside in a day or two I will call the oncologist As I have been taken off the tamoxifen with the bleeding and what’s happening to my hands and feet I’ve been on it for five and a half years What it does is shut my estrogen in my body Now there is activity going on And the kind of breast cancer I have is driven by estrogen I have spotted twice since being off the tamoxifen and like now a one pimple on my face A indicator of hormones at work My fear is not only what I’m feeling But that this particular kind of cancer like to metastasize to bone and lung I need to stay positive I know but tell this brain that and with everything that has happened I don’t want it anymore I’m so done Holding on Oh Heavenly Father hold me tight Me |
Went to all my appointments
Had ultrasound of empty breast area
Blood word And my new doctor on my train A vascular doctor had me have upper extremities of veins and arteries looked at via ultrasound His first thought with what’s happening to my hands and feet Be a result of my cancer drug Tamoxifen I have a follow up with him no that I had the test done Hope to have answers I experience so much pain all over my body I just don’t talk about it anymore I ask Heavenly Father for a miracle Amen Me |
Eva,
You had mentioned having pain under your right armpit in January. You also mentioned you would be seeing Oncologist in February. Did the oncologist have any suggestion why you were having the pain issue under armpit? Also, was there concern about your going off the Tamoxifen? Hope your new doctor can give you answers now that you have additional testing done. Gerry |
Hi Gerry
It was the oncologist who took me off the tamoxifen
As his conversation were as the new vascular doctor Patrick McGovern Upon my first appointment with him he said the oncologist did do with concerns of clots The general thought till I see him after the vain and arteries is although the estrogen is shut down as my cancer is estrogen driven It is the progesterone that causes vain problems I have been in tamoxifen for 6 years one year earlier than one would be taken off It usually a 7 year treatment So progesterone causes the vains to dilate and cause some complications including affecting heart Bottom line we shall see Will try a keep posting So much going on My grandchild mother My child was released from jail yesterday A long long ongoing problem with the father And until she leaves him nothing will change Just trying to take care of myself and my two who are in my care Corissa is continuing night school for her diploma That is priority right now I wish she could motivate herself to work part time But I do not focus on that Her diploma comes first Hoping you are doing well As I think of you Live Me |
Eva,
I had a lumpectomy on April 11th. It was an Invasive Ductal Carcinoma of the left breast. This cancer too is Estrogen Positive/driven. The cancerous mass was small; but the cells were already invasive and Estrogen fed. The biopsy shows the results of the surgery margins were clear. I see the Oncologist this Tuesday, May 15th. The surgeon said I will need either Tamoxifen or Arimidex. The Arimidex is often for those who are post menopausal (I had a complete hysterectomy some years ago)and the Tamoxifen usually for premenopausal. The surgeon said our body /tissue still produces Estrogen even after menopause so I will still need either one of them. I am concerned since I already have so many of the problems these two medications side effects cause which both are very similar. Really hope and pray Corissa will get herself to be the best person we know she can be. The diploma is the first step. Gerry |
Gerry, I’m so sad to read this, I’ve not been active much on the boards, just too tired, but this news made me wish I’d made more effort. Thinking of you dear friend.
Eva, friends and family who have been on tamoxifen (many I know of) have been in for 5 years only. I think perhaps it may differ from one country to another sometimes. Quote:
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Gerry, I am sorry to read that.
A post-menopausal friend of mine got Arimidex post-surgery. That was six years ago and her check-ups have been fine. I hope that will be true for you as well. :hug: |
Pam, the surgeon said the time is usually 5 years; but I have read articles that encourage a longer period of time. I'm also suppose to make an appointment with a Radiation doctor which I have not yet done. I will ask the Oncologist to suggest someone when I see her on Tuesday.
She was the Oncologist I originally saw when I had surgery for rectal cancer in 2012. I had declined chemo treatment at that time but the surgeon that did that surgery said he would accept my declining his recommendation only if I was well informed and and saw the Oncologist he recommended before my next follow-up appointment with him. The Oncologist did agree that chemo would most likely cause my PN to worsen. She wanted me to be sure to have a CEA test every 6 months which would most likely show the next area the cancer would turn up; which I have been doing. So far it has not appeared to progress. I had not previously mentioned on NT until my 5/11 post to Eva that I had been diagnosed with breast cancer which was actually located on my annual mammogram in 2016. The radiologist said it was small and appeared to be benign. As a result he suggested I get mammograms and Ultrasounds ever 6 months to keep watch. Which I had been doing. This past February, the radiologist suggested that I should have a biopsy done because the mass appeared to be changing. The biopsy was done at the end of February (my gynecologist said he could not feel anything there); so I was caught by surprise when I received a call the next day after the biopsy that I had Invasive Ductal Carcinoma. My children urged me to go to Northwestern Medical Center in Chicago rather than see the surgeon in my area the gyny suggested. Northwestern Medical Center is where I had the surgery. Even the surgeon at the Medical Center could not feel the mass so I had to have a pre-wire inserted thru Ultrasound just prior to surgery to locate the mass which was small and on the back wall of breast. Afterwards was transferred to the hospital across the street where surgery took place. .....Had I not been getting annual mammograms; by the time this would be something the doctors could feel, it most likely would have been much worse. This is a good reason to keep up with annual mammograms for women usually starting at 40 - 50 yrs. old. Gerry |
Started to bleed again
Going for another internal ultrasound
This just won’t stop Having all that is happening Or should I say Trying to keep up with my health has become like a job It taking my real job from me is one thing Preventive health practices show something is always up Keeping up has become a full time thing So many doctors Just so many Still need to see the vascular after the tests he ordered Went to obgyn for routine pap just three weeks ago My bleed began four days ago I’m floored Just floored Having my breast taken As it is driven by estrogen Takeing me off the tamoxifen that I have been on a little over six years because of the vein problem and the vaginal bleeds damned if you do or don’t Just so tired of it all Seen the eye doctor Having to go to a Reyna specialist all just s**ks Had my mammogram done ultrasound Seeing a dermatologist today Come on already Gerry thinking of you I know you understand being tired of it all But like you said Can’t just let things go What kind of an example would that be to my children So doing what I must Just sick of it all Me |
Good news
Well having seen the dermatologist
All looks good This was great with all that going on Me |
Right implant
Begun to deflate
It be the last thing I deal with Just so much going on with this body My days feel outnumbered Where has all the time gone Just let it go I keep telling myself |
I have yet to
Make the appointment with the plastic surgeon
It’s the last of things to do for this body On the 11th with the cardiologist Oh how exhausting it is for us who have so much going on with ones body Don’t know if I’m coming or going Just had MRI of right shoulder and my bloodwork for my cancer This still has a hold on me So many doctors so many bills On a much better note My son has gone into a long term facility six months to a year for his recovery Hope Still something I hold on to Keep putting one foot in front of the other My granddaughter needs her Mimma Heavenly Father did not bring me this far to throw it away I will continue to do his work Amen |
Eva,
Your son going in to long term recovery is very encouraging and something to give you hope. God knows your granddaughter needs her Mimma. Hold on dear lady. Gerry |
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Thank you for the love She hold on to me for dear life Doing so well in school Yesterday to hear from Corissa was heaven She misses us terribly May she find her way back Prayers I ask That she find her way Take care of yourself dear lady This is the month I found my lump It was in cancer month 2011 and my anniversary date of removal of both breasts January 9 2012 Now to return to the doctors who did the botched job will be interesting My oncologist and pulmonologist both recommendation to return I check with the insurance company if he is in my plan Luckily he is So like I said I be the last on the list of things to do for this body Ran into my gynecologist when getting the mri Of shoulder says Eva you look so good I respond why thank you doc Shan’t to know what my secret is I’m rotting inside He says stop saying that However the fact is that is what is really happening Why can’t they just admit to the brutal honesty The European genes does not do to this body any justice Not an an easy thing to say but the truth I come to find out Raynaud is hereditary I wonder on which side My father didn’t hang around long enough it will be 38 years Where did the time go Be well I’ll keep posting |
Eva,
I'm glad you heard from Corissa. I pray for you, little Eva and your children; but when I first spoke with Corissa; as I have mentioned before, I felt something special about her . Please let her I care about her and if she would like to send an email; I would be happy to hear from her. You have my email address; she may as well. Both of us lost something to cancer in 2012; you breast cancer; me the rectal cancer/removal. I also had Invasive ductal breast cancer operated 4/11/2018. It was invasive. The surgeon from Northwestern Hospital in Chicago did a lumpectomy to remove the mass as well as an area around the mass was also removed.That area test came back clear. For five years, I'm suppose to be on a breast cancer daily med to hopefully prevent it from returning. I am not tolerating it very well and dealing with side effects. If I understand correctly it appears you might be having additional surgery done on the breast? Is that correct?::hug: Gerry |
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So to keep it short I will let Corissa know I had a double mastectomy Taken off of tamoxifen by oncologist Because of the Raynaud finding Now my implants are failing The left has what is called a double bubble Immediately after they were put that six years but now the right one is deflating Both the oncologist and pulmonologist agree it’s time to see the plastic surgeon as it’s become painful The tamoxifen did do many things like thicken my facial hair nausea and lots of other things But my question to you is Does the doctor know you don’t take your medicine Send gentle hugs dear sweet lady |
Eva,
It appears the Tamoxifen and Arimidex has very similar effects. The Tamoxifen is usually given to those who had/have breast cancer and were premenopausal. The Arimidex is given to those who are postmenopausal. The side effects of the Arimidex are awful. I had to give at least a week or so without the medication. The sour/acid stomach,(since the rectal cancer; I am dealing with abdominal pain and "potty issues" & hernias and this just adds to the pain) along with heart attack like chest pain, burping and upchucking some bile. The wrist, fingers are so painful because of joint and bone are affected. I am all ready dealing with PN and edema which legs and feet are painful; this stuff causes ankle/feet swelling. Rather than hair growth, I am loosing hair; even on my legs which I don't mind; but the the loss of hair on my head is a problem.The loss of strength and fatigue is awful. I will probably go back to the meds during this week. My cancer cells were estrogen positive positive. There are anogens in our bodies that turn in some form of estrogen even after menopause. These meds are to try to completely stop this from happening. I see the surgeon's assistant for 6 month checkup in two weeks. I will let them know what issues I am having with the Arimidex breast cancer meds; but not sure whether I will mention having been off for almost 2 weeks. Not sure which is worst, worrying about cancer returning or feeling so sick adding to my already over and above the usual pain issues. Eva, I think you may have had a lot of these side effects when you were taking the Tamoxifen. Your breast deflating and double bubble has got to be very uncomfortable. You have been through so much. Thanks for letting Corissa know. I just think about her and all she can be. Hope she is able to turn things around. I'll never forget when over the phone she thanked me for being friends with her mother. It was so touching the way she cared about you. Love & Prayers, Gerry |
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And I so understand weighing the so I or shouldn’t I concept There are many time I wonder what if I just stopped take all the meds I’m on And I know her heart is with us As I tried to get out yesterday If I had to do it all over I wouldn’t have introduced her to her dad so young As like my ex husband had visitation rights and chose not to excersize them as I was his main concern The same was with Corissa father And because I wouldn’t have anything to do with him like that anymore I feel he used her to hurt me To this day she has body issues As he called her fat and held meals from her The body shaming did much damage and I blame myself I wanted her to have the opportunity unlike my other children to have a relationship with their dad But I wish I held off As my other children at an older age began to seek out their father and found what was true all along I hurts to see your child go through unnecessary pain as I know it to well and what it does to ones spirit Especially when I have memory from the age of two He would feed her money Root of all evil if not treated with respect And couldn’t do anything but watch him destroy her She knows the love mommy has for her is real and undying Eva is in love with her BFF best friend forever She is now looking for love in all the wrong places And all I can do is pray all the talks we have had over the years are recalled at the right moment I hoped to hear from her yesterday that did not happen And as much as I want to reach out I refrain from doing so I so understand the pain you speak of and yes your understanding of tamoxifen is on point I was given progesterone twice while on the tamoxifen levels off Oh what we women go through Not to say men don’t But nothing like our breed I’m at the pout of understanding how with everything I have been through I’m my life I can help others when they ask And I give it away I have but the work Heavenly Father has me do I cannot lie and say that I still wonder if that chance to live and loved in return as I still haven’t truly had that special relationship with another And I don’t mean the love I have for my children or grandchild or sisters I think you understand So dear lady My wish for easier times Thank you for you love and concern Be well in arms of an angel Me |
Appointment made
October 31 with the surgeon
This will be interesting Very interesting Me |
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