You are doing great! Was good to see so many responses...

I am my Olhipie's full-time caregiver. My Mom who is now 86 moved in almost three years ago. At first I was so frustrated...took all my privacy away. We then gave her a second room so she can choose what to watch on TV and have her own privacy. It was so great to have my living room back. Before we created her TV/Sitting room she was in our living room, which made me feel like I had lost a room. She would often complain about Olhipie and what he enjoyed...football for one.

I'm very blessed that she is so thankful for everything I do for her. She never complains except when she runs out of snacks or yarn to knit or crochet.

There are times that I want to go outside and scream...I do go out and say to myself...I can't do this. Then it thought comes into my mind as if my Dad was right there...love her and care for her as I did.

I am thankful for this time with Mom to learn how to love her in a way that I haven't done before. She is an amazing women...

I get no help from my siblings for her grandchildren except my children. My daughter lives in Moms old house through the field and my son who lives with us. Lots of family live very close by but none have made the effort to visit...they are the ones who are missing out and will have regrets...

Just love her!!!

Well, my update is mom moved back to TN. She couldn't take the cold up here even though they are having the same cold in TN. She wanted to go all the time, I can't. She refused to get involved with any activities in the area and just sat around. That was not healthy for her or for us. The tension was at an all time high in the house.

She's now home, smiling from ear to ear. She's with her friends and family again. Even though we worry about her, she is only 65 and the neuro assured us she is fine to live alone. He said if she messes up her pills again it will be on her because that is her only problem. He said she should never have another seizure as long as she is responsible and takes her pills like the doctor ordered.

So the moral of this story is. Do not move your parents into your home until they have rehabbed at least three months after a hospital stay. Do not assume the doctors are always right and go with your gut feeling. Do not do everything for your parents because the neuro said that only hinders them. He said let them try and if they need help, offer, but let them try first. For my mom, she has to retrain her brain. I pray her friends and family down there allow her to try on her own. If they do it for her she will let them.

I love her, I miss her. But living together while she was still healthy and able wasn't working. We'll be there for her when she needs it. Until then, smile mom, your home where you belong and long to be.

That's a great update Sandy. It would be hard to have her in your home when she is able to care for herself. I think the first year and a half was the hardest for us. Now she is fine....we had a place called meals on wheels that would bring in lunch for her on the week days...icky meals and cost too much. After Christmas we started doing her lunches. My biggest problem is that I forget and then she will eat later than she should. We don't always eat lunch so that's why I forget.

Happy all is well Sandy!!!

just wanted to let y'all know we have both a commode and a working tub now. still painting etc. i learned how to relax my worrying and let some stuff roll off me and feel much better now, as does dad. however dad is threatening bodily harm to the authors of the 1040 and california state tax instructions. the dog is still happy to crap right where we want to step. and i have a part time job again after months of unemployment. life is good.