Hi, everyone. I posted this on the intro section of the forum, but I thought that I sohuld copy and post it here as well!

I found this forum today, and I am hoping that I can get some advice. So, I am sorry to jump right in, but I am desparate for advice.

My grandfather has probable FTD, and it is putting a tremendous amount of stress on everyone. He is very combative with regular arguments with my grandmother and the daughters. He is threatening law suits with people around town, he's trying to get slanderous articles published in the local paper, etc.

I have been selected (and volunteered) to be the person to take the next steps for getting everyone help. My husband and I have the best relationship with him, and he acts like an angel whenever we are around. And time is of the essence.

My husband and I live in Chicago, and I have ties to the AD Center at Northwestern U....but that doesn't do us a whole lotta good. My family lives in very rural Ohio with very few resources. For instance, my grandfather's GP gave him this "diagnosis" and sent him on his way. He told my grandmother that she might want to consider moving him into a nursing home. Not appropriate at this phase.

#1. At this point, we want to get him into a specialist to get a diagnosis, but this will involve travel--Ohio State is just an hour away. And it is fairly safe to say that he won't go to such an appointment. Does anyone have any suggestions as to how we can get him to go?

#2. My family gets so emotionally worked up when grandpa gets on one of his tears. Does anyone have any tips to help them manage their own emotions, as well as how to get his mind off of whatever has him over-reacting? In particular, my usually sunny grandmother sometimes seems like a zombie when he is having a bad day.

#3. Does anyone have any tips as to how I can manage this situation so that my grandpa doesn't distrust me? I am afraid that the more I get involved the more suspicous he will be of me.

Any help is MUCH appreciated!