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Spouse of husband with TBI

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Old 04-11-2014, 11:39 PM   #11
leftbrain
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Question Long term effects of TBI.

When I married him 15 years ago, I didn't know my husband suffered a serious frontal lobe injury at age 5. I just thought he was misunderstood. He was, of course, because he was hurt at a time when no one considered the long-term effects of such a severe impact. He seemed fine when he recovered from the two week coma, so that was that. Thus began a life of stealing, drug and alcohol addictions, compulsive financial behavior, and unhappiness for his ex wife and kids. I met him in AA, and we have shared a journey of sobriety which has brought us close. But the lying, the verbal abuse, the insanity and all the other hallmarks of TBI have begun to take their toll on me. I came to realize his behavior was caused by the TBI, but I don't know how to get help for him or me. No one can understand, and no one believes it could be real.
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Old 06-24-2014, 02:38 PM   #12
Mitchyme
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Default I have felt these same emotions....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stacyrose View Post
Hi I am new to this site. I am looking for other people whose husbands or wives have had a TBI. My husband suffered a Severe TBI 9 months ago during a dirt bike accident. I'm not quite sure where to begin just knowing I'm not alone would be a nice change.
This is the hardest thing I've EVER had to do in my life. I am a young mom and have had to become the breadwinner, the only parent and learn to love a new man in my life....my husband...please look at the small victories each day, that is the only thing that has kept my head above the water (even if only barely). Know that you are on my heart and in my prayers...Michelle
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Old 06-24-2014, 06:57 PM   #13
Mitchyme
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Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stacyrose View Post
Hi I am new to this site. I am looking for other people whose husbands or wives have had a TBI. My husband suffered a Severe TBI 9 months ago during a dirt bike accident. I'm not quite sure where to begin just knowing I'm not alone would be a nice change.
I have felt the same way since my husbands Severe TBI 2 years ago...my youngest daughter still asks when her "real daddy" is coming home..My heart is with you and I have just joined this group as well. The first step to a new tomorrow, at least that's my hope.
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Old 07-07-2014, 10:17 AM   #14
Bigsky
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Thumbs up the good & the bad

Do we breathe through the hard times? Pray for that light at the end of the tunnel? I cant help but ask sometimes, "God, why am i in this?" I am with a man that has a severe brain injury. Three years ago it happened...and was not expected to live. Too much damage, swelling, etc. He did and he is an amazing person. What an inspiration. But every day is a struggle for him- b/c he doesnt recognize who he is. He is not whatsoever the same person he was prior accident. But everyday he gets up and finds someone to help in this community we live in. He is so loved by so many. BUT!!!!! There are mood swings, inability to discuss "certain" topics b/c it will stress him out and he says, "if we talk about it i could have a seizure." And the anxiety ensues. There is also lying....the lying seems second nature. And NEVER even if caught will admit to the lie. So ya, the good with the bad. Ive signed up to see a counselor for both of us. It can take its tole - when u are the person who helps the most, does most everything and then are treated disrespectfully. Not easy. My heart goes out to you women with tbi husbands/boyfriends. Stay strong.
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Old 07-10-2014, 08:34 PM   #15
Tina Demes
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Default When to leave...

I am also a spouse of a person who`s had a severe TBI.He is 59 and I am 31.He is AND WILL BE the love of my life.I loved him since I was 17.He is so angry,ignorant,sometimes even violent.Always unpredictable.Dr Jekyll,Mr Hide.I have been at his side since he was in a medically induced coma for 35 days last April etc.He is also epileptic but I don`t mind about that.He just doesn`t seem to love me.I do not want to be his nurse but his partner,his wife,his lover.He doesn`t feel about me this way anymore.
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Old 07-11-2014, 08:07 PM   #16
anon1028
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wow. after reading all the posts I now know what my girlfriend goes through.. it is just as hard if not harder o the oter side
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Old 12-22-2014, 07:41 AM   #17
Wife of TBI hubby
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Default Me too Stacyrose

Quote:
Originally Posted by Stacyrose View Post
Hi I am new to this site. I am looking for other people whose husbands or wives have had a TBI. My husband suffered a Severe TBI 9 months ago during a dirt bike accident. I'm not quite sure where to begin just knowing I'm not alone would be a nice change.
My husb is 10 mo. Post fall on the ice at work. He came home said he didn't feel right, refused the hosp. Two days later as I checked on him, one eye was turned in. Went to hosp, ct scan neck and head. Referred to Neurosurgeon for neck x 2 mo. Kept telling Dr he wasn't able to recall anything. Two and a half months later sent to Concussion specialist. Sent for cognitive therapy 30 visits. Was sent back to work. Just finished all therapies for while.

Husb impatient, grouchy, no compassion or empathy. Told new Neuro he finds no joy in anything. TRUE. I am lonely, unloved and happy to find a place to speak w others in same boat. He's on antidepressant, just put him on a mood stabilizer. Many prayers to you. Hope this site will be helpful for the both of us. I am married to a stranger.
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Old 12-22-2014, 09:15 AM   #18
Kitt
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Welcome Wife of TBI hubby.
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Old 12-23-2014, 10:29 PM   #19
Wife of TBI hubby
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Smile thank you Kitt

This all will take getting used to, but thanks for your welcoming me!!!!
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Old 12-23-2014, 10:36 PM   #20
Wife of TBI hubby
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Default oh my....

I can relate to every post and comment here!!!! So happy to be at what feels like "a family reunion" where your meeting your new cousins for the first time. I've lived without support, as the caregiver for nearly a year now. It is very lonely.

Can anyone tell me how long it takes moderator to approve posts?? I posted on this site yesterday. Thanks in advance.
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