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Old 08-10-2015, 09:14 PM #31
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Originally Posted by missyr70 View Post
You are not alone. My husband suffered a TBI over 2 years ago after being hit by a bus. He is like totally different person now. We have been married for 20 years and it seems like I don't even recognize him anymore. It is very depressing and stressful.
Hi Missy,
I just joined the group today. I am going through the same thing. Husband is not the same. I am living with a strange person
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Old 08-10-2015, 09:16 PM #32
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Originally Posted by susan blake View Post
My ex husband has normal pressure hydrocephalus and had surgery. Since that time he has turned into the most hateful person I have ever seen. The surgery worked but has completely changed him and I am the only person he is hateful to.
My husband has been taking all his hatred out on me as well.
Life has been miserable with him since his TBI
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Old 08-10-2015, 09:18 PM #33
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I am struggling as well. I have been married to my husband for 5 years and have a 1 year old. Everyday is unpredictable. It is hard because looking at him he looks "normal" and can blend in and be very charismatic with others. But everyday he reverts into a child at some point. Tantrums, self absorbed, manipulative, impulsive and the list goes on. I am at my breaking point, but I love him and is the father of our daughter. I am concerned however about our daughter because he can be cruel and children don't understand that Daddy doesn't really mean it. It can warp a child and their self worth. It has effected mine to say the least. When is enough enough? They don't mean to be this way but you can only take so much right?
Hi Laura,
I just joined the group today Not sure if you are still active.
People that do not know my husband, think he is normal. But his friends and family can see a difference. He is hateful to me though, Not them
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Old 10-15-2015, 07:38 PM #34
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Hi,
I am sorry about your husband and his injury. I am going through TBI with my husband as well. It has been a year, things are better than they were a year ago. I am hoping he is generating more brain cells.
We have good and bad days. I am learning when to walk away instead of trying to reason with him when he is too tired or "off"
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Old 03-18-2016, 07:53 PM #35
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Default Hubbie Has MTI Since 10.2001

I hope I'm in the right thread. Has any spouses experienced the feelings of resentment. Not so much for the TBI but for the new "colder" spouse> I've been at it an extremely long time. I often fantasize about running away. I have no family. I don't have a friend that I could trust with such personal info. My husband's TBI has made him a professional, charismatic "new" person to others. They think tat I'm the one that is being mean and abusive. The reason they believe this is because the "TBI Spouse" knows how to win points through his "outside personality." Now, I have to give credit where credit is due. My spouses TBI sense of humor is HYSTERICAL!! But, the dark days and nights are very dark. Throughout the thread, I noticed something in common. That is, why do the nonTBI spouses feel that our TBI spouses are taking it out on us?? There seems to be a lot of anger or something like resent.
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Old 03-26-2016, 12:19 PM #36
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Originally Posted by takinxanax View Post
Everyday is unpredictable. It is hard because looking at him he looks "normal" and can blend in and be very charismatic with others.

I know what you mean about looking normal. My husband is a master at mimicking and acting normal. After years of knowing him I know he isn't authentic and it's like living with an unpredictable hodge-podge personality.
I'm going through a similar HELL w/ my MTBI husband. He's extremely charismatic in public, treats everyone so nicely. I have taken care of him since he was hurt in the Line of Duty in 2001. I now have PTSD & Fibro. The PTSD is from the post accident personality. I walk on egg shells. I never know what;s gonna happen next. Lying and manipulation are the samething as breathing for him. He has everyone believing that I;m the real problem b/c his lying and manipulation are so good. NO ONE knows what goes on behind closed doors. My son was 12 yrs old when the accident occurred. He/s now 28 yrs old and overseas. He and his girlfriend are taking my husband's side. I'm confused b/c my son went through the hell w/ us. y husband has chosen to be my son's best friend since the accident. So, I was always the bad cop parent. Sometimes, I just don't want to live anymore. I have ZERO support. Sorry so depressing. This is my 1st time writing a peply. So, please let me know if I did something wrong. TY
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Old 09-04-2016, 11:02 PM #37
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Default New here too, so you're not alone

Hi, I'm new too. My husband suffered a TBI 3 months ago so we're still trying to adjust to it. He wakes up every morning and doesn't remember anything that has happened since a few days after the accident. He still thinks it's June. His brain hits some kind of reset button when he goes to sleep and erases everything he's seen and done during the day. That's right people, I'm actually LIVING 50 First Dates - and it is not fun. The mood swings and temper tantrums with me I can handle but when he gets around our kids and does that stuff, I make him leave the room. It's been a hard few months but I'm slowly seeing some improvements and that's encouraging.
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Old 06-01-2019, 08:52 PM #38
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Default Trying not to be angry

I've been married for a year and a half, and my husband's TBI was only correctly diagnosed a few months before our wedding. I didn't know what I was getting in to and I can't help but feel lied to. He didn't know about his vistibular imbalance either, because for a decade he just thought he had migraines, gritted his teeth, and plowed forward without properly seeking medical intervention.

Now he is finally addressing the underlying issue with medical care and physical therapies, which is good and I need to give him credit for doing so. The problem I am struggling with is that it feels like he uses his TBI as an excuse for bad behavior. Rationally, I understand that the TBI is a real reason, not an excuse. But on days like today when he leave a pile of laundry on the couch for days, but can go out drinking all day to celebrate Liverpool, I have a hard time understanding why TBI makes it so hard to do chores, but doesn't stop him from having fun. I get that today was a big big day in sports, and that he deserves to have a normal life celebrating something that he loves. I also know that he is paying double for the fun now, and very likely all day tomorrow, because of the TBI. The cost of fun is much higher for him. How do I not feel angry and resentful for leaving me with the sole responsibility of taking care of house and home, because he used all his energy making his choices with full knowledge of how much recovery would follow?

He budgeted the time/energy to have fun, but didn't budget the time/energy to finish his chore. I feel like I live with a child. Is this normal for TBI?
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Old 06-03-2019, 04:31 PM #39
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Hi Chien Vert

Welcome to NeuroTalk .

I am sorry to read about your husband.

The TBI/PCS forum here is very active.

I am sure that if you post there you will get lots of support and good ideas from other members.

All the best.
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