Caregivers Support A place for people who are a caregiver to another to find help and support.


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Old 02-16-2015, 11:43 AM #11
ger715 ger715 is offline
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ger715 ger715 is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2011
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Default Tessab,

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tessab View Post
I don't even know where to start. Do any of us really know where to start our stories? My husband has TBI. It will be a year April 20. He bumped his head on our wedding day and within a week had to have emergency surgery. He was a recovering alcoholic seven years sober when we met. The brain injury has turned him back into a raging alcoholic. The whole situation is sucking the life out of me physically emotionally and mentally and he is oblivious. I have no support system here which is why I am on the site looking for at least someone who understands my situation. I moved from Hawaii to South Florida because he said if he could come back to Florida everything would be okay. I really wanted it to be true so I uprooted my entire life and I'm now in a place where I am completely unhappy and don't know anyone. And of course things are no better than they were in Hawaii. His blood alcohol was over 500 least week.!! How can he even still be alive? He decided he needed to go to the hospital and he just got out today. I thought everything was worked out for him to go into rehab recovery after he went through medical detox but of course that fell through. He was having to be monitored so closely they wouldn't put him in the detox center and because he didn't go through detox at the facility they wouldn't take him in recovery/rehab. He can't get disability. He can't keep a job. It's like having a three-year-old again. He goes to the bathroom on himself, he falls down all the time, he doesn't bathe, the list goes on and on and on and on and on. I don't know how much is TBI and how much is alcohol anymore. I tried so hard to take care of him and make sure he took his medication and do everything I was supposed to do. I'm terrified every day what I'll come home from work to find. He lies and steals, is combative and completely irrational 98% of the time. He's been hit by two cars and a big truck since we've been here in the last seven months because he gets on his bicycle and rides around completely oblivious to the world around him. I guess I'm really hoping it is the alcohol making him behave this way and that he'll quit drinking and everything will be fine. I know that's not reality but I need a little hope. I'm a special-education teacher and I've worked for many years with students with behavioral problems, brain injuries, mental illness and intellectual disabilities but I just cannot handle the addiction. I'm here to talk or listen if anybody needs me.... Thanks for letting me vent.

Just wish I could offer some good suggestions/solutions. You are in a real predicament. Unless you take care of yourself first, you cannot be there for anyone else. I'm not sure how much longer you can handle all of this behavior. If he will not accept help; you may, at some point, have to let go.. I wish you all the best at whatever you decide to do.


Gerry
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EnglishDave (02-16-2015), Lara (02-18-2015)

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Old 02-18-2015, 01:36 AM #12
Lara Lara is offline
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As mentioned in previous posts above on this thread, there are also support groups for caregivers and partners of people with TBI. The members on the TBI/PCS forum here may know of some resources for you too.

keep safe!
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Old 06-29-2015, 07:05 AM #13
Mystical Mystical is offline
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I have been to a meeting with the Brain Injury Alliance support group for our state and it was very very helpful. I met so many wonderful people who were very informative and supportive. They meet monthly and just had a BBQ recently for all extended family. I've also been to another support group for teens with PCS, so that was really useful. They also have some event in June, and meetings resume in the fall. I was reluctant to go at first, but they really understand. If there isn't a chapter nearby, you can form me. All the best!
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