Pam,
Maybe you might want to start out telling the people taking the blood about your Mum; so they might have a better idea that you really do know what you are talking about.

My veins are are so good; I actually get compliments. I get blood work done regularly every 4 to 5 months; so "no problems". (actually; only once when the nurse forgot to put something holding the spot when removing the needle; blood all over...)

You probably won't be up to sending posts for a few days after the surgery; but will be counting the time til we hear from you....

From the descriptions you have given; it appears there are a lot of "ifs" depending on the circumstances what will or will not be done during surgery.

Hope all is going well for you and DB in the meantime....

Gerry

Before they introduced limits on number of attempts, the most attempts on one day has been 11, the next 9. I always tell them, but, they inevitably think they can do it and we end up in a dilemma with the number of attempts allowed. I sometimes think because I know all the terminology they think I'm being a smarty pants.

My writing of mum prompted me to send her a message saying how good she was and how I'm not sure I've ever said it before. She was very good at her job, initially a nurse, trained in midwifery as well. Had us children and returned to work when I was about 2 or 3 so my nana looked after me a lot. Perhaps that's why I never really bonded with her like my siblings. As I said in another post, I will always be my mothers child & of late I have reached a state of mind where I can forgive her for many moments she could have, and should have, handled differently. I know she loves me in her own way, and I no longer need to seek her approval. I can and do hold my own in life. She was very controlling, I can see that now having recently read many letters corresponded in my teens. Where my siblings lied and went behind her back, I was always honest to a tee. I could see no point in lying because I was going to cop her wrath one way or another... I have to say it's nice to have had the epiphany moment and I have been significantly relaxed in her presence ever since.

You will probably hear from me, I apologise in advance I will be on morphine and ketamine so heaven help what gibberish I will write. Even though I know now I shouldn't write... thank you for being such a staunch support Gerry, your every word brings me comfort

Pamela, I hope that all goes really well on Monday.

All of my thoughts will be with you then.

Pam,
Your "gibberish" will be most welcomed and look forward to receiving...
As always,
Love & Prayers

Gerry

I'm here, in pain, under for 4 hours in recovery for 6. Blood was 45/40 it had apparently been lower... in PCU. DB been & gone, spoke to mum on FB Messengers, these new hearing aids mean I can see & talk with her on her iPad or iPhone. It was like she was in the room with me & she could see & hear everything for herself as a former nurse it gave her comfort, and was good for me. Then did the same with my sister using FB messenger.

In a lot of pain, feel very weird, the op according to what DB was told went well. Not sure what was done but one nurse said 3-4-5-S1 if thats the case he then gave it his all. The pain I'm in is not my lower back, it's my stomach, upper back & hip. Stomach incision feel like a million Lilliputians stabbing with swords repeatedly. I had a bone graft as well, that's hurting too in my hip. Speak again soon when I'm with it.

I hope that your recuperation goes really well .

Pam, Thank you for thinking of us at a time like this. I checked a little while not really expecting to see a post; but there you are..........As I have mentioned many times; "You are amazing".....Seems like you had the complete work done. The bone graft for fusion can be quite painful.

Praying.....


Gerry

The ketamine stopped this morning, with it came clarity of thought & severe back pain. They're struggling to control it. Feel awful, no adequate words to describe & added addition of a headache. Stomach hurts, spine hurts, hip hurts and right shoulder hurts.

Pam,
Hope you are up and about at the hospital with pain being held in check. When you feel up to it, would love an update.

Pray all is going as planned.
p.s.

Niggs posted more new poems. Please check them out . He really enjoyed your posts on his work.

Gerry

I've been up and out of bed into the corridor twice, have been the to loo a number of times for number ones and yesterday they gave me suppositories for number 2, PLUS 1 sachet of movicol the day before and 2 sachets of movicol yesterday morning. Needless to say after drinking the special nuclear fluid for the stomach scan within an hour, I had the urgent desire to hit the pan. I held on for grim life and avoided any acccidents -luckily!! Been for number 2 again this am, so all good on that front.

I am however feeling very down and anxious. Pastor came to talk with me to find out what was wrong and suddenly I blurted out it's almost 40 years to the day I had my first spine fusion and the orderly entered my room at 11.30pm and placed his penis on my pillow. I awoke and screamed and another orderly came in, they had a terrible fight, long story short, they both got the sack. But for me it was just brushed under the carpet.

The room I'm in is lovely, but it's at the end of the corridor, everyone stands outside my room ruffles through their papers and I'm constantly singing out who who is there. The nurses say I'm never sleeping and I need to sleep to heal. Pastor has rearranged the curtains, placing them on the left and I have a clear line of sight to anyone walking to my room or past it. It just came bubbling up out of nowhere, must have been the ketamine bringing the memory back.

Dr Harsha, General surgeon did a nuclear scan yesterday, he told me he had to cut through the multiple inscisional hernias to commence and to close use A1 mesh to help close the wound without need for further hernia surgery down the track. I will google A1 mesh, apparently it's natural and the blood cells intermingle with it and a permanent barrier formed. ...

Dr Narula has been, he has told me this morning he is very worried over the S1 fusion with pedicle screws & I have choices to make, never ever bend to tend to the dogs, cats food, water or ablutions, or the S1 which he couldn't get to will cause significant problems, it was too dangerous to get to it as I'd been under so long and my BP dropping very very low so had to finish up. Now that's going to be a convo with DB and a half....no bending at all, no bending to the dishwasher, to the front loader washer, can even put my shoes on, have to get resources to use. Luckily I have a few already.

Mum coming to see me today, the Pastor says I must talk with her about the event when I was 16, the pastor says I must so as to move on from holding against her, it's just 3 weeks later my brother beat me up, his future wife lied and said he didn't touch me and the said bikie who rescued me from him then raped me 4 hours later. Not sure this is the place to have that convo for her, particularly as I've just made peace again myself with her, can't see what is to be gained, but pastors says maybe it's mums chance to say she's sorry she didn't do more... decisions decisions.

Post edit

I've decided, I have nothing to gain by asking her other than to rehash old angst, but I see the Pastors point, mum may wish to say something...I'm not saying it outright, I may if there is a chance ask her if she recalls the kerfuffle over the orderlies being dismissed, if she says yes I will say why were they sacked. But it's not her fault that event happened & I don't hold her responsible for it, I can only say it's such a shame I was this frail little looking teenager with strawberry blonde hair, ripe for cretins to take advantage....

Post post edit, mums sister came as well, so I said nothing at all. And, tbh, I am glad she came, I can't put myself through all this again and again. I've accepted it happened, I have no idea how or what mum & dad said, perhaps they were the reason both were sacked. Just nothing to be gained by asking, so I'm not. We had a lovely visit and it was nice to see them both - NB got a temp of 38.3m nothing is ever easy xx