Still no surgery date, we're living on eggshells in case the fragile routine I have with my pain under control fractures. I'm seeing the General Surgeon on Thursday 14th, we know the op isn't the 16th or 19th so perhaps it will be the following Saturday. It's hard for these surgeons to free their time up so I just have to be happy with how things are going. There are days when I wonder do I really need it, I can't recall how bad the pain was, or much about the difficulty in walking, I just know it happened & it was bad. And I know the scans don't lie, there is a real danger of the spinal cord being compromised should I even fall over. I feel giddy a little when I think of the number of falls I've had these past 12 months...
I do have some good news, my job brings me in close contact with many treatment providers, one group has offered me FOC post surgery recovery program it's worth considering in the big scheme of things, a physio & physiologist will work with me & develop an exercise program to will help me all they can achieve maximum medical improvement. I am a big fan of their serivices & refer my clients to them all the time. I feel quietly chuffed because I was going to ask them would they consider doing a non WC patient & was I able to pay for their services. Of course I will have to declare it and go through the clearance etc with corporate office (it's a gift) and even if I can't take them up on it at least I know it they will be willing to assist me and I can pay them.
So it's just a waiting game here, got mums hearings aids on trial, wow technology is amazing. I can ring mum on the phone and talk to her, I haven't been able to speak with her on the phone in over 3 years. I cried the first time we tried it in the hearing aid office.

Met with the General surgeon, proposed date is Monday 25th September. Have to confirm with the Neurosurgeon & make arrangements to meet with the anaesthetist next week. Explained I've had heart arrests, over 27 blood transfusions in previous surgeries, a botched hysterectomy, peritonitis twice, MRSI, bowel resections & I'm feeling very nervous. He seems to think it will be all ok and he will go slowly. I told him the surgeon who botched the hysterectomy said my major blood vessels were not where she was expecting them to be....

Pam,
Glad you have been given a date for the surgery. It had to be even more difficult the not knowing, etc. It appears you are in "good hands" for the surgery, as well as having good insurance coverage for the surgery and recovery with the help of a physiologist.

If I understand correctly, you will be having fusions as well as repairs of past fusions?

Much to do to prepare for surgery as well as time during post surgery/recovery.

Thoughts & prayers are with you.


Gerry

Right, it's time. With next Monday being the big op and it having been spelt how serious & dangerous it is, it is time for me to be the bigger person and phone SIL K and apologise for any perceived wrong doings or sayings I have said or done which she uses as justification to vilify me. This time in 10 days, DB may have need of any or all family support he can get. While he may get little from his big sister, at least I will know I have done all I can to clear the air and should he ever talk to her again he can do so knowing I have apologised and attempted to right any wrongs, to accept fault in anything that has occurred. Do I feel nervous, yes, do I feel sick, yes. But needs must. What's the worst that can happen, she can hang up on me without speaking, she can say get lost, she can abuse me. I've had that and more from others. I can and will take on the challenge of being the better person. So be it.

Post edit
No answer, I waited until it be 9am thinking it's a Saturday morning, don't want to be too early. Feel ill, hands shaking, feel like I'm phoning to speak with the devil himself. Our lodger asked am I ok, I'm white, shaking, got a bucket in case I vomit, 2 heat packs to soothe my head and a towel for either wipe tears or spew.... will keep trying. I have the Goddess of wisdom and courage Athena by my side. I can do this.

Still no answer

Pamela, I want you to know that I think that you are a strong and brave person.

All of my thoughts are with you.

Pam,
By this time, you may have already spoken to her. Instead of getting sick over the reaction on the other end; do you think sending an email or texting her first letting her know you would like to apologize for any wrongdoing, etc.: Also Let her also know if she is open to your calling her, you would like to speak with her personally.....or something like that.

BTW: does she have caller ID? Also are you able to leave a message when calling?

It's sad you are putting yourself through all this anxiety.

Obviously you have a lot going on with your surgery; but most likely the doctor was trying to let you know recovery may take a little more time than one would hope; but wants you to be aware of this fact up front.


Gerry

I've just got off the phone now, obviously not home yesterday. She answered, I said K it's Pam & please don't hang up. Her first words were I don't have time for this on a Sunday morning. I said I won't keep you long, I'm ringing to apologise for any hurt I've caused you, it's not been intentional. I don't expect you to forgive me, I just want you to know I'm sorry to have caused you angst. I loved your mother and we love the same people, yes I argued with your mam, but mam and I got on and mam knew I loved her. And it's important to me you know your brother still refers to you as his big sister. K said he thinks I've abandoned him and I haven't, we said a few more words and I said see it seems we can even agree on the same things. You should know DB has been sober for 2 years, she said that's good, Gi is just out if rehab and for me not to listen to the niece K. I said I haven't spoken with any of them and none know I'm making this call to you. It's all on me, obviously I did something to upset you and if I could take it back I would. I finished with saying, I don't expect us to ever be friends K, nor for you to forgive whatever it is you hold against me and I'll let you go. She thanked me for calling.

Jealousy has always consumed her, it is a sickness and she has allowed her thoughts to wallow in it. Up until I came on the scene she was hailed as the smart girl going places, then DB married me, university degree and somehow my name got mentioned in her mind more than hers. I did even say today, I have never tried to usurp you nor do I want to. I just want everyone to get on and I don't want me being used as the reason for people not talking with one another.

I cried as I spoke, but I made it clear, this is all on me, my choice to phone, my choice to say I don't expect forgiveness, and my choice for her to know I'm sorry to have ever hurt her.

No they haven't even mentioned recovery, how long I will be in hospital, or off of work. The 2 main surgeons Neurosurgeon & General have made it clear the surgery is proceeding because of the hairbreadth distance between the pedicle screw and the spinal cord otherwise they would never contemplate it. There is every possibility they get in and have to back out without achieving the Anterior fusions or removal of the screws. I have had to sign legal waivers to agree to the surgery.

It just amazes me with all our advancement in technology and imaging, they can't see from the outside where the blood vessels are. That's the big problem, the last few stomach surgeries I had, I bled out on the table, it's why I have had over 27 blood transfusions. So the bleeding out is a significant problem and the heart is the other problem, I've had 3 heart arrests in my life time directly attributed to anaesthesia.

Pam,
There seems to be a real problem with the screws when having fusion. A couple of years after my L4-5 fusion, I had a myleogram (sp?) (which some fluid is removed from spinal cord to allow a dye to be used). The orthopedic surgeon, along with other issues said it was imperative I have surgery to remove the screw because the tip of the screw was at the point of a major blood vessel and was endanger of this becoming quite serious.

Very strange about the issues with the screws... Makes one wonder..... I never did anything about it. This was about 8 years when the problem was discovered.

Although in your case, you have additional serious problems including the heart arrests attributed to the anesthesia. The bleeding out is another very serious problem.

Out here; surgery, including my spinal fusion /laminectomy does/did require signing legal waivers which is pretty standard. It appears by your description this is unusual in Australia.

For peace of mind, it's good you talked with SIL K. Jealousy can be wicked.