I want to take this time to thank everyone who has replied.

Alffe~ I have started to journal several times and just don't keep at it. I know the importance,but I have so much to do right now. I've just had the one surgery & getting ready for another. Then I have sold most of the farm and bought a place in town. And I need to have an acution soon , before selling the house. Then the moving process will begain and I don't have any business lifting nothing. I don't know how to manage it all the way it is. My churchfamily is here or I am there all the time. They are good to me.

Mama Sue~ Thanks for the prayers.I will always need them.I do have good days, but it don't take much to push me over the edge. I also have a nephew that is willing to go the second mile with me. Our son is in prison and I don't see him. When I had my will made out I had help threw a lawyer where my He is like a son also. No one else has been this kind so he will be rewarded when I can't manage or if I die..

Rocking 4 Epilepsy~ I'll be to tell the story about my husband, but I think it is on a different forum. May I can copy it, I'll check. I have a doctor appointment shortly and don't have time to type it all up now.
Blessings,
Fancylady