[Kim I am sorry about your loss of your son, I lost my mom last week 2/5/12 at first it was like I could not believe how i was handling things I flew from my home town San Diego to Omaha was ok through everything then came home and cried. I had my initial cry when I found out mom had passed, but I did not think I would have more tears come (so hard) , I have been reading on grieving, I am finding everyone grieves different, first ALLOW yourself to feel to cry. it is hard for me because I get so drained but I am finding I also get stronger after, DO NOT SECOND GUESS yourself, I hope you come back to this forum and allow yourself to write anything that is on your mind, that is what I have been doing. my prayers are with you. Samuel