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01-07-2014, 08:08 AM | #1 | ||
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Junior Member
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I know that this thread is almost a year old, but I am new here, and started reading some different threads...this one...is so very "special" and I needed to read it...I know you Believe...He takes us where we need to go... I also experienced much of the same in my life concerning the loss and grief of many loved ones. The first was my mother who died from suicide when I was 9 years old. I did not experience the first coffin or even the grave yard, just a family meeting after her burial at my great Aunt's house. Which was full of "nasty" speaking of my mother's being in "Hell" because she had killed herself. That is the reason my father did not have us, my brothers and I attend the services...he was trying to protect us from this unspeakable pain. Actually, I thought that for some reason, people had somehow lied to me and I looked for my mother many years, thinking I would find her. Every store, every street, everywhere...my heart was searching. But of course, she was never to be seen again.... My father remarried and it took a long time to accept my new step-mother...now endearingly I call her... Mom. Several grandparents like yours slipped away, some were step grandparents, some not. I did start to do what you described so well...as I was growing up, I realized this was part of life...this was where God would open my soul, spirit, and mind. And then, like your grand-daughter...my own daughter, Gerri Ann, died in my 36th week of pregnancy. Carrying her in my womb knowingly dead was the most difficult time of my life. The Dr. wanted nature to take its course, allowing my body to go into labor on its own to deliver her. After a week...my own brother could not stand it anymore, I was calling him day and night looking for support...my husband at the time locked himself away...unreachable...my brother called the Dr. and my induced labor was scheduled....I briefly saw her because my own body required surgery immediately due to hemorage...and then a couple of days later after her autopsy which revealed nothing...I went to the mortuary while my babies milk was still dripping...and dripping...and then a few months later, my last living grandmother died... About 6 years later, my father was killed in a car accident on his birthday. Everything stopped...I could not move...I dropped the phone when my brother told me...and I cried and prayed. Were he and my mother now together again? I prayed to know this for many years...I envisioned my mother in a rocking chair in Heaven and holding my little girl with my father beside them. And then...my sister...died at age 53 from a terrible reaction to her third attempt of tissue being applied after her third degree burns from a house fire. This one was very different to me...different because I had been going through the possibility of having a brain tumor called an acoustic neuroma..and she and I shared our faith and love together...little did I know it would be her time to go...not mine. A year later...my brother, died of a sudden cardiac arrest at age 50 on Thanksgiving Day. He and I were like twins, only 11 months apart, so this one burned a "hole in my heart". By faith, and continuing hope to see him again, I endured and am still working through this...allowing the hole in my heart to heal but still knowing that the scar would remain. And now...and now...the Lord has given me a gift!! I recently had a brain tumor for real this time...and a craniotomy to surgically remove it...and in that process I had a Near Death Experience....and saw them...and spoke with them...and then the Lord told me I had to return..."It was not my time." I shared this with everyone at the hospital...everyone..to include the surgeon who prayed with me before my surgery, the nurses, my husband, my children...and now you. Heaven is for real...and YES, my mother is there as well...she had suffered from a medical condition that caused her suicide...God forgave her as He is willing to forgive and love us all...Jesus made sure I knew this...to share! I know this is a long sharing...but hoping it Blesses those who need it. Joanie |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | DejaVu (07-30-2015), eva5667faliure (01-10-2014), ger715 (01-10-2014), Mark56 (01-07-2014), PamelaJune (05-24-2014) |
01-07-2014, 08:34 AM | #2 | ||
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Elder
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I re-read the posts. Grief and the human condition does come to us all. It seems that many lives if not all, are in stages of grief. Oh the tears we cry, for those that gone, and for those of us who remain. I don't think I could have gotten through some of it without my faith. Our own mortality steps ever quicker toward Our Father in Heaven.
Thank you for the blessings of these posts. It reminds me we are all part of this human family. Our destination isn't of this world but of the next. Hug those you love everyone, give an extra I LOVE YOU. Take the time with your parents and loved ones to squeeze each moment you have with them. That is what I am trying to do now with my tiny family that is left. I tell my son daily, my grown man how much he means to me. I pray for a family member who shuns me. I pray for my grandson I never got to see. ginnie |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | DejaVu (07-30-2015), eva5667faliure (02-09-2014), ger715 (01-10-2014), JoanieP (01-07-2014), Mark56 (01-07-2014), PamelaJune (05-24-2014) |
01-07-2014, 09:21 AM | #3 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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I am reminded of "Glimpses of Truth Thou hast for me" from a lyrical line which allows us to know such a wonderful key is placed into our hands. You highlight for all of us the underscore to all human existence.....; namely, God's embrace is known to all who will have it...... even hung on a cross on a hill in a refuse dump because God IS to all and everywhere AVAILABLE.
Your experience brought crystalline to your thoughts God's love and forgiveness transcend our own frail human capacity to live love completely. You have glimpsed the truth of your Mom holding your baby as your Father stands nearby. How beautiful a living moment of complete love realized at the hands of ABBA God. How Beautiful...... How Beautiful is the body of Christ..... I cling fast to the body which so exudes love and peace which brings forth to each who will hear AND listen knowing the stillness of calm and green grass in the garden with the Lord. Thank you so much, Joanie, for sharing in such a loving way, You led us to drink once more this day from the everspringing well of Love, and Blessing, My prayers are with you, Mark56 |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | DejaVu (07-30-2015), eva5667faliure (02-09-2014), ger715 (01-10-2014), ginnie (01-07-2014), JoanieP (01-07-2014), PamelaJune (05-24-2014) |
01-07-2014, 09:23 AM | #4 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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Thank you for adding your precious perspective to the thoughts here expressed. I am so glad you have, as I have known, the love of your family in the many life trials you have and continue to face.
You are beautiful in your grace, my friend, Mark56 |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | eva5667faliure (01-10-2014), ger715 (01-10-2014), ginnie (01-07-2014), JoanieP (01-18-2014), PamelaJune (05-24-2014) |
02-09-2014, 01:34 PM | #5 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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i so understand i continue to mother i allowed my daughter to have this weekend with her and she is my child that i have to remind i am a mimma to her i am not suppose to be a mother and i know you understand what i am trying to get across so painful
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someone who cares eva |
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01-10-2014, 08:46 AM | #6 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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as your road is as heavy as your cross you have certainly blessed me in many very important circumstances a strong soul in spirit you are strong in you affirmation to your family passing may you rest in ease and truly no how important when sharing you heal i relate i pray your stay be filled with JOY AND HAPPINESS
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someone who cares eva |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | DejaVu (07-30-2015), ger715 (01-10-2014), ginnie (01-10-2014), JoanieP (01-18-2014), Mark56 (01-11-2014), PamelaJune (05-24-2014), tengchewguat (03-09-2014) |
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