Healthgirl you are working through the mental exercises needed to help you Cope with a long-term or life-long Chronic Pain condition.
To both of you, the Goal is Acceptance, of being in constant, excruciating pain. Losing one's social, and possibly work, life. Being restricted in what tasks one can do. Losing friends/partners. Warding off Depression.
I have suffered extreme Chronic Pain that has become worse year on year for 25 years with added complications like TN, Cluster Headaches and Cancer. I Accept that the damage done to my body causes some of the pain. Other factors cause other problems which I also have to Accept.
But I don't do it meekly. I still see all my Doctors, even Neuros again this month, to see if there are any improvements over the pain/neuro meds I take. I also read when I can. Today I found out there may be a link between some of my Neuropathic problems and heavy use at work of Xylene and Toluene in the '80s.
Work on Accepting your conditions, while fighting it every step of the way.

Dave.