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Old 10-18-2017, 11:37 PM   #1
dianne duncan
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my husband passed away on Saturday he was my whole world we just loved each other so much we where always together I told him years ago that if he died on me I would come with him we had such a closeness I am finding it hard his funeral is tomorrow and I just want to go with him, I hate being here without him I am so sad all the time I just miss him so bad
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Old 10-19-2017, 12:36 AM   #2
PamelaJune
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Dear Dianne, I want to offer my sincere condolences on your recent loss. I can only imagine how difficult it has been since he passed and now with the funeral tomorrow, your pain and sorrow will be as fresh as the day it happened.

Your husband must have been a very special person if you felt even before his passing that you to would wish to go when he went. I can't speak for your husband, or your family, but I'm sure your husband will not want you to do something rash & act on your impulse.

While it may be too early to consider, there are groups who help you deal specifically with living a life alone once your significant other /spouse has passed on. My Aunts in Wales both lost their husbands in separate time frames many years ago in a small Welsh village but from it they learned woman across the world need help to adapt to significant changes. They began hosting cooking classes titled just for one at the local hall, it including from the oven, stove top or the microwave to fridge or freezer. It's the little things which can suddenly overwhelm you, by habit you will cook for 2, and it's quite hard to adapt to cooking for one, particularly as the shops package everything up for 2 or more.

For so long your identity, in some way, reflected your relationship with your dearly beloved. And now you will need to begin to adapt to living on your own, without him. You may find your identity will slowly shift and change. Don't try to do all this on your own, reach out to family and friends, or local church groups. Or us here on NT. I have found NT to be my life line saviour on many occasions, for many different reasons over the years. The beauty of NT is there is always someone somewhere on line, someone from anywhere in the world. And you can tell them things without fear of judgement.

You will be in my thoughts and prayers tomorrow Dianne, your much loved husband, well he will be with you in your heart and in your mind.

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Originally Posted by dianne duncan View Post
my husband passed away on Saturday he was my whole world we just loved each other so much we where always together I told him years ago that if he died on me I would come with him we had such a closeness I am finding it hard his funeral is tomorrow and I just want to go with him, I hate being here without him I am so sad all the time I just miss him so bad
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Old 10-19-2017, 02:36 AM   #3
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Dear Dianne

You have my deepest sympathy.

I have no wisdom to offer you beyond saying that grieving always follows its own course and takes its own time.

Whatever feels right for you, no matter what it is and when it happens, is the only thing that matters.

With care .
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Old 10-19-2017, 03:33 AM   #4
dianne duncan
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thank you for speaking to me it helps that I am able to tell people that are not going to judge me I know jeff wouldn't want me to do anything that is wrong
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Old 10-19-2017, 05:53 AM   #5
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Dianne

You have my deepest sympathy. I'm so sorry for your loss and I know that feeling of being lost. I hope you'll continue to come here and let others help you through this difficult time.
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Old 10-22-2017, 05:54 AM   #6
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Hello Diane, just letting you know you're in my thoughts as you move into another week without the love of your life by your side. These days and the next ahead as you negotiate the sorting of banks etc are some of the hardest to bear. I just want you to know you are not alone, you have a virtual online community here willing to help by listening and if requested, sharing experiences. Anything you say here remains here, and whatever you say just know and draw comfort in the knowledge there is no judgement.
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Old 10-24-2017, 02:22 AM   #7
dianne duncan
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it is helpful to come here and just talk I would like to thank you all for your condolences and prayers, I feel so lonely with out him we where never apart in the last 10 years he was always at my side I find it so hard to cope without him, we done everything together now there is nothing to live for no future that I can see at the moment maybe somewhere down the track I will be able to see more clearly
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Old 10-24-2017, 06:44 AM   #8
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Dianne, please remember that we are always here to listen to you without making any judgments.

If ever you want any suggestions (your call) you have only to ask.

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Old 10-29-2017, 02:30 AM   #9
dianne duncan
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thank you for being there I just find it helpful to vent as I am not able to talk to the kids as I am trying to be strong for them but I feel so lonely without jeff all I have done today is cry I miss him so much I hate feeling this way all I want is for him to come back
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Old 11-01-2017, 01:02 PM   #10
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Default I'm so sorry for your lose Dianne

My name is Debi and I live in the state of Georgia in the US.

I lost my husband of 35 years 2 years ago this past August. He was only 58.

I could not have gotten through his passing without this group of caring people. They listened to whatever I had to say.

I'm 55, have 2 grown children and 5 grandchildren. I still don't see where I'm headed in life. But I'm NOT giving up.

Due to my severe SFN and other issues everyday is a struggle. I wake up and look over hoping to see Bubba but he's not there. He's in my heart and soul and I can feel that.

Bless you sweet lady. Remember the good times with Jeff and lean on us wherever you need to.

Debi from Georgia
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