It's been five years since my son Brendan died,
it took me a year to be able to say the word "died"
A year to look at his picture....
I've yet to look at his obituary, or a family video.

My loss has brought me so much closer to our Creator
As I pray for inner strength to survive, to live on each day.
I believe our Creator has blessed me, with a state of shock, sadness
and inner strength,
Not anger or bitterness.

To buffer me from the wrenching pain of the greatest loss a human
being can endure.
The Circle, that I've come to know, of The Compassionate Friends is
truly a blessing
Of Compassion, Support and Understanding friends.
My wife Barb, her support and understanding is a blessing.

I have come to understand what "Forever" on this Earth means,
"Forever" is hard, very hard....
Fills one with tears and the proverbial "Whys?"

"Forever" is so difficult for the bereaved to come to terms with
in our most difficult journey in grief.

Gene Caligari, Brendan's Dad

Taken from The Healing Garden, The Compassionate Friends S.B.Newsletter

Oh, Alffe...I feel for you, friend.

Forever really can seem impossibly hard, especially during those times when a single bad day feels like it will never end.

I had a sister who died very suddenly when she was twelve, and I was thirteen. Her heart burst during PE class at school, from a defect that none of us ever knew she had. You're right...for a whole year I kept expecting to see her every morning. In my dreams she was still alive, so in a way each morning was a refresher course in pain.

I'm very sorry about your son. I'm very glad that you've had such support from those around you. You are a very admired person, you know. All the best to you and yours...

Idealist

Oh Idealist, I am so sorry about your sisters death. When someone dies suddenly it just catches us unaware and we aren't prepared for the grief.
It must have frightened you also considering your ages. (((Idealist)))

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Alffe)))))))))))))) )))))))))))))))))))))

May God Bless you and your family.

You and family are in my prayers.
Linda

It is hard this time of the year. I know I always think of family and the ones that are not with us anymore. They are missed. It is so hard to give them up. Then the years start going by and at times, I want to say, stop the world I need to think of my loves ones. If we could only have pleasant dreams to brings them back briefly. I have often wondered if they can see our happy times. I know they don't see the bad times. Once and a while I have a good dream about one of my loved ones and it is like a visit from them.
May God Bless You,
Billie