Hello. Im new here also. I also lost my baby son from SIDS. He died the day he turned 4 weeks old. I understand what you are going through to an extent. No one else buy you are in your shoes and knows exactly your circumstances, but, I did want to tell you that by sharing your feelings and not keeping it all stuffed inside you, you are doing the right step in healing. It's taken me alot of years to heal, and I still cannot get the image out of my mind of that last morning with Kory when I woke up and he was not alive anymore. I am sure that Im not the only one that can somewhat relate to you and your pain and loss. Keep sharing your feelings and dont keep them all stuffed inside you. For years, I turned to alcohol for numbnes and relief. Then I just came across many many more problems. This is NOT the answer by any means. I will pray for you, and just realize that you're not alone. Sincerely, Mykinzie