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Old 02-15-2014, 03:44 PM #1
ginnie ginnie is offline
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ginnie ginnie is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Anna Maria Island Florida
Posts: 6,278
10 yr Member
Default Hi Moosy

The situation is extra hard, as he is in your home. Hard to tune that out. I think he needs his hearing checked. Most likely the TV is turned up because he can't hear. If it gets annoying, pull the plug, or the breaker to turn it off. If he acts like a child, treat him as if he were. There should be consequences for poor behavior or rudeness. Being old is no excuse for being mean or rude. Not acceptable. I still think the doctor should be involved in this.

My mom died a number of years ago. Yes she was very, very hard to manage. I took care of both my folks as they declined and passed away. I tried very hard with my mother. I attended seminars for care-giving to help me cope with my mom. When she was terminal, Hospice had a program for families for those in that roll. Best thing I ever did. Your library or Senior center near your home should have this kind of help. Sometimes bringing another "Brain" into the situation may provide some help. Look into it if you can.
Being a caregiver to someone that is difficult may demand of you more than you can tolerate. Having CRPS is awful in itself. Also if this is effecting your BP, that isn't so good. That stress level needs to come down for the sake of your own health. High BP makes the CRPS worse. Try to get some council as you really do have a problem that causes stress and tears in your home. There is no shame in asking for help just for yourself, so that you can deal with it better. Sometimes we can't change another person. We can only change how we react to them. Do all you can do to lower the stress OK? Let me know if you find some agency that can help. Keep in touch and let me know how it goes. I wish your family would be more supportive of the whole situation. Husband should recognize this as being a problem. It can hurt a relationship too if things get out of control. You two need to stay close and communicate even more, while you deal with your F-in-law. Keep praying, and I will too. ginnie
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moosey2me (02-16-2014)
Old 02-17-2014, 01:14 AM #2
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moosey2me moosey2me is offline
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Originally Posted by ginnie View Post
The situation is extra hard, as he is in your home. Hard to tune that out. I think he needs his hearing checked. Most likely the TV is turned up because he can't hear. If it gets annoying, pull the plug, or the breaker to turn it off. If he acts like a child, treat him as if he were. There should be consequences for poor behavior or rudeness. Being old is no excuse for being mean or rude. Not acceptable. I still think the doctor should be involved in this.

My mom died a number of years ago. Yes she was very, very hard to manage. I took care of both my folks as they declined and passed away. I tried very hard with my mother. I attended seminars for care-giving to help me cope with my mom. When she was terminal, Hospice had a program for families for those in that roll. Best thing I ever did. Your library or Senior center near your home should have this kind of help. Sometimes bringing another "Brain" into the situation may provide some help. Look into it if you can.
Being a caregiver to someone that is difficult may demand of you more than you can tolerate. Having CRPS is awful in itself. Also if this is effecting your BP, that isn't so good. That stress level needs to come down for the sake of your own health. High BP makes the CRPS worse. Try to get some council as you really do have a problem that causes stress and tears in your home. There is no shame in asking for help just for yourself, so that you can deal with it better. Sometimes we can't change another person. We can only change how we react to them. Do all you can do to lower the stress OK? Let me know if you find some agency that can help. Keep in touch and let me know how it goes. I wish your family would be more supportive of the whole situation. Husband should recognize this as being a problem. It can hurt a relationship too if things get out of control. You two need to stay close and communicate even more, while you deal with your F-in-law. Keep praying, and I will too. ginnie
Thank you.Sorry it took me awhile to reply.With everything going on lately I have to try to get in the mood to write.My pain takes over .I have spoken to my husband more about his dad..He says just stay away from him..He wonders what his sister thinks..so I told him on Tuesday when she goes down stairs to see pa,he should speak to her alone..thank you for all your help..its all takenin..sorry about your loss and your hard struggle you had to be in..
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Old 02-17-2014, 08:23 AM #3
ginnie ginnie is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2010
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ginnie ginnie is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Anna Maria Island Florida
Posts: 6,278
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Default Hi moosy,

Hope things turn out better for you. You are doing the best you can. Write whenever you feel the need to. Keep on top of your own health, and take care of "you".
I am praying for your family daily. I am here to listen anytime. ginnie
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