She is in ICU... pneumonia. Not sure if she is going to make it but I will let you know. Absent directives, decisions now are harder with emotions high. Poor thing. Who knows, she may just pull through.

oh rumpled :( so sorry to hear of this.

just glad she is under proper care for now.

do let us know how things are going

Cheri

She in on a ventilator, has a feeding tube, picc line and they are doing everything they can... which is so... sad as she is just not fighting for it.
My hubby wants my FIL to make the final decisons and my FIL wants my MIL back the way she was - do we see a huge disconnect here? Her kidneys were not doing well so that may take care of the decision. If she pulls through, she will be totally bedridden and even harder to take care of than before! And less of herself...

rumpled, this must be so very hard for you all. Denial is so difficult to handle, especially in loved ones. I hope that MIL will be well cared for in the hospital and that perhaps there will be some form of caring intervention to help FIL see things as they are and not just as he wants them to be.

how about you? how are you doing? you have your health problems and I do hope the stress of all this isnt making those worse for you. remember to take care of you too.

I spoke to the pcp today.. she said that had she not been put on the ventilator on Monday night, she simply would have passed away peacefully but FIL could not direct the docs appropriately so absent knowing what to do, they vented her...
She also told me that she has told my hubby and my FIL straight out when she offered them hospice in October that she was dying and that they need to make arrangements. My hubby told me that he felt the doc was just offering hospice just to get his dad to get more help and to get help seven days a week! What a disconnect there, huh!
At this point, they may have just saved her for a feeding tube and more poor care. It was not what she wanted. Not at all. I am so unhappy. Not that I want her to die... I just want her to be in peace.

just checking to see how things are going, rumpled

hoping maybe a turn for the better, or at least continued care in a safe environment

She is off the vent, slowly winding down. Just tested postive for MRSA. They are having to decide on a permanent feeding tube (with surgery) but I think they are going to decline and just let her slide. She is still in the hospital. She was screaming for a bit but now seems to be calm. No idea how long she is going to hold, poor dear. FIL and hubby are having a hard time with all the decisions that have to be made now. No arrangements for care or her final ones have been made - denial still runs deep.

I am sorry to hear that, rumpled and I pray for her to be at peace.

it is probably going to hit FIL really hard when she goes, and your hubby too and so I pray you will be a source of strength and comfort to them when the reality finally dawns.

Cheri

My MIL passed away yesterday. She recovered a bit, went into a home as she required a lot of care and then got pneumonia again. She went peacefully in her sleep.

my deepest sympathy, rumpled, but I am thankful that it was a peaceful, with proper care.