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I can easily see the depth of your Love and your commitment. I can also clearly see your spiritual devotion. Your heart is huge. Your strength and courage truly immense. My heart aches for you and your family, often. I am very guilty of wanting to see you catch a much deserved break, a reprieve full of Comfort, Peace and Joy. :) As I've written in another thread (S.O.S. thread), I have so very much to learn from you. :hug: I am grateful. Enjoy the afternoon at the pool, Sweet Eva. :D :hug: DejaVu |
Dear Eva,
Never isolate yourself, it is what the Darkness wants. There, it can gnaw at our Soul and our Spirit - our very Beliefs. Here, in our warm Community, there are uplifting Bonds of Friendship and Family - ties formed across the Ether. You, above all others, have taught this introverted Englishman to Share for the first time - and become a better person for it. We all rely on each other. Dave. |
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Thank you for that Connecting As One Love Me |
Eva,,
Dave put it so well.....that is what the darkness wants. We also know this to be from the "evil one".
You are strong; you will not let him have you. You are a child of God. Gerry |
still visited by...
such deep dark pain
i no long can describe burning awake tearing me apart in my core lays evil the tears that come come from hell no way can this feeling emanate from God this is not a welcome feeling grows in size never ever worried how much of me it takes weird to talk about something that is going on with me and only i have control of me and i haven't had the strength to fight it off at that point submitting to it and just cry for a an hour and am floored at how many tears i cry enough to be dehydrated this i'm sure of the intense pain of sorrow as they just flow where is it all coming from why can't i be happy i am responsible for my own happiness it is not anybody who has me in this state it be what i allowed and the rest ready to follow and the end results are always i don't want to go on anymore how does one move forward when the company that comes to visit and finds a solid place in my being this is my struggle it is my daily struggle and it is not letting up why can't happiness be a feeling that that comes in many forms it is something nobody can do but myself for myself a fix myself i don't want to hurt i really don't take me out love me |
Dear Eva,
I understand. The pain and numbness in my arm and hand has robbed me of the ability to interact here. I am lost, the Darkness is Total. Dave. |
The darkness is always beaconing; especially when we are at our lowest most vulnerable times. Even the desire to pray is difficult. Fear of what lays ahead can add to the darkness.
I am reminded of a time when I was asked to write something down: It went as follows: NO GOD KNOW FEAR NO FEAR KNOW GOD I was inspired to mention this. Gerry |
Dear Eva,
How are you holding up? Dave. |
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holding just holding i am here as it is very difficult just to hold is difficult so much i hope your doing better then your norm if it isn't one thing it's another searching for the strength i know you understand i know you get it i am so isolated maybe next week if i am up to it i will visit an old time friend i spoke of him in the past lives down the block from me known him since grammar school a place to chill but not this weekend maybe next anyhow depression through the roof off the charts what else you get it love you me |
Eva,,
Hopefully you will get to visit with your friend. It would be good if you feel up to going. A nice change of scenery and someone to revisit some old memories. Maybe even a laugh or two.
Love, & Prayers, Gerry |
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