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03-12-2017, 12:36 PM | #431 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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It really can feel all the emotions we go through
When sadness is around as much as it is around here It's tough keeping a chin up Constant sadness takes on a toll physically I fight it everyday with the help of Heavenly Father So much sadness Must find things to do for me Much love and happiness pours out of my grandchild Will attempt a project She is joy in everyday And the best time is when she comes in my room every night to say our prayers The Lord's Prayer and then the Hail Mary in the order she wants We hold each others hand and close our eyes Awesomeness To find my happiness My worries with my grown onesie hard All I can do is pray they too find Jesus Christ Amen
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someone who cares eva |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | PamelaJune (03-12-2017), RSD ME (03-19-2017) |
03-21-2017, 01:32 AM | #432 | ||
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Senior Member
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Hi Eva. Hope you're doing better today. I haven't been on the forum too much lately because of my poor health. But I'm feeling a little better an wanted to let you know that I"ve missed all of you so much and hope you're doing well. Hugs from your forever friend.
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RSD ME . |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | eva5667faliure (03-21-2017), PamelaJune (03-23-2017) |
03-21-2017, 01:35 PM | #433 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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Back to you
Thanks for reaching out It is so good to hear from you Loving empowering hugs in return Me
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someone who cares eva |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | PamelaJune (03-23-2017), RSD ME (03-21-2017) |
03-28-2017, 11:38 PM | #434 | ||
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Senior Member
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Hi Eva. Just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you and hope you are feeling better. Hugs to you my friend.
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RSD ME . |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | eva5667faliure (03-29-2017), PamelaJune (03-29-2017) |
04-26-2017, 11:24 AM | #435 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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Won't get much out
As I am leaning on Heavenly Father I am all over the place with this tiny family you would think not much would be going on So far from that idea It is not that I don't put one foot in front of the other and just do someone has to Everyone else has a life that they have to figure out The problem beings with calling me and letting me in their world And yes I listen and listen until I have a chance to speak on a matter I have experience with or on And if one isn't reseptive to anything I have to suggest and just wants to hear what they want Well to that I say contact me when you are really ready to be honest and truthful Until then I have my own path I have to walk My life has changed It changed me forevermore and I am a better person because of all that has happened it is not easy And to put my Spirit first and follow all else follows exactly how it is suppose to be I miss the routine coming here and trying to follow and start to write only to loose it And have had help explaining how to hold on to it I just fail when it comes to technology My body slowly breaking down as time goes by Doctors still cannot figure out why my body veins in my hands and feet Will return to finish Baby sister stopped by Back It a hard thing to have to turn my back on my family I no longer am a punching bag No longer their cheerleader no longer will I pick up the phone when I have walked the walk into 25 years of soberiety and for my son to think he can do it on his terms he will need to step out of my life as I will not entertain his desire to pick a fight with me as does things HIS WAY All I can do is pray but I must cut my ties with two of my children it is because I love them I step back and not be the reason in anyway They must do what they must without me My health is priority And I'm going through it by myself and Heavenly Father I pray all will pass without incident Me
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someone who cares eva Last edited by eva5667faliure; 04-26-2017 at 01:59 PM. |
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04-26-2017, 06:00 PM | #436 | |||
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Senior Member
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Oh Eva, you must look after yourself, you know this as equally as you know they must follow their own path and come to the realisation sobriety is just that; it's not moderation, it's not controlled using, it's 100% without substance clear head. I join you in prayer this will come without incident. My prayers too are for you, sending you virtual hugs
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I can still remember what life was like before pain became my life long companion |
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04-27-2017, 05:41 AM | #437 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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After five years with my granddaughter
She has been recommended to attend the school for the gifted and talented Not only did my for children attend the same school Now Eva will be attending She loves to read loves it So thrilled for her Hoping mom will find her way As smart as they are it too comes with many adversities They are not babies anymore And addiction is prevelant in this tiny family Something they do not seem to remember how mommy has her soberiety to handle first One day at a time It if it be the only thing I do in my day and not pick up I have yet another day sober It matters It matters more than anything to me It made me who I am today And I like me To my dear friends who support me through my trouble and I thank you Thank you Me
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05-03-2017, 08:03 AM | #438 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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So tired
So tired of bad people I will be in court only to have that time come Not well is she I can walk into court confidently with all to show And understanding I cannot be the one to take matters into my own hand So the managers were to have been handling this I never had any intention to file a police report Not something I should be doing even though it is me and my family subjected to her abnormal psysocotic addict behavior So having an understanding of this I hold those who are responsible to handle it The management office As I collect all evedince of said complaints Point A very important document that was delivered by me as my eighteen year old as witness And as it was opened Requested it go in file In it it asks the three top persons in the chain of command and as instructed by them to call the NBPD and to go place a complaint on her This is where I remind them what the lease says And it clearly explains the management and maneger are suppose to take action on this letter submitted I have my own copy What are the chances my suspicions come to light Of ALL documents THEY MUST GIVE ME TO SHOW WHAT THEY DID TO HANDLE AND RECTIFY THE SITUATION " is missing" In it I say me and my family are subjected to irrational behavior roaming the halls inebriated knocking on doors for drugs And disturpts my sleep as our apartments are identical and her bedroom is above mine I have caught by recording her when this awakening behavior is at all hours of the morning And much more I have continued to call "only when she is OOC" Now it is where it is I told Roslyn the director who I do not trust for other reasons that I personally encountered by other tenants One of the questions I have been asked for example is "How much did you pay to come into this building" Approached at the town pool while I'm in the water with a friend and interrupted by a woman who since passed Peggy was her name Was the first one to ask me And other things began to happen and thought then Oh my goodness What am I going to have to deal with in this building And because I had 10 years experience in my previous building I will have pictures to submit what me and my children along with all the other tenants the true meaning of a slumloard It was a brand new building The third and fourth floors weren't done yet 10 years fighting the system And in the end me and another tenant were the ones who made a difference We fought to the very end So when I had a chance to come into this swelling I was thrilled I was at that point on leave with no pay And let me say something It is if not worse here then what I went through in my previous dwelling in my home town for 46 years To here hoping for peace a way to start over with a forever changed life I have always been a smart cookie I had some court experience Represented myself and made a difference In set precedence in New Jersey back in 1988 The case was talked about for years His name was judge Shaffer Had everyone stand up and told them "You can all thank mrs. ...... for the hard work she did" And what that means is I did their jobs Depressed sure I am I am tired And she has much to do with the lack of sleep I need my rest It is very important And to know having to deal with corrupt people really really upsets me And if by chance the proof I have is not enough just the first top three piceces of evedience wouldn't be enough to show the truth I then will be very disappointed There isn't anything this woman has as I do not do anything We are quiet Even my granddaughter understand no running or jumping So my arms must be wide open and say yo myself God you have me go through this for a reason Only you know what that reason may be I have my own ideas Heavenly Father is using me It is over a three hundred unit building The management likes to strong arm the helpless Those who have no idea they too have rights I will try not to be upset as I get all ready fir the courts And have my Savior in my being I'm so tired So tired Depressed of how many bad people in the world Me
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someone who cares eva |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | PamelaJune (05-04-2017), RSD ME (05-04-2017) |
05-04-2017, 07:53 PM | #439 | ||
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Senior Member
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Praying for you Eva. I have seen alot of bad people in this world too, but have also seen some good ones as well. You are one of them! Hold onto Faith and Hope one day at at time and know that you matter and have made a difference in this world. You helped me cope with my (recovering) brother. He is still not talking to me but I hear from his friend he is doing okay. I couldn't have gotten through that pain without your help. Hugs to you.
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"Thanks for this!" says: | eva5667faliure (05-05-2017), PamelaJune (05-05-2017) |
05-11-2017, 08:33 AM | #440 | |||
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Grand Magnate
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After my prayers
And meditate I begin my day So difficult as the pain level is way up there In addition to the harassing behavior of the above tenant with whom I will be going to court with As SHE put out a harassment charge In all and short I was prepared from the building I come from I never wanted it to get this out of hand and as I had personal reservations how the management office operates The director who I deal with always has been caught in a few lies This will be interesting As the charge is not light And because I have an assigned worker in the case from my phone call to Housing Mortage Finance Agency who in turn directed me to the appropriate department are the only one who will direct me I have taken all the proper steps So I did my part Found my suspicions were on the money I will be picking up a written explination where and how my documents went MIA The director is throwing the lettter to be written into the hands of the new additional manger to help the helplessly lying one May my Heavenly Father so who calls the shots All I ever wanted was for the vicious racket stop But we are talking about many corrupt cans that may open up The fellow assigned to my case is my saving grace Hopefully this will all be behind us and she will stop I have so much proof to show it is a false report At the hours of her racket I have nobody else but the police to call I retire to bed by 11:00 in the evening It usually begins at 1:00a.m. In the morning and like every hour on the hour Burned out my little iPod recording her noises that wake me Why I say do I have to go through this And at this level So much embarrassing truth is coming out I would be ashamed if I did what the director thinks she is allied to do Terrible Terrible things when money is at the core of it all My body hurts so badly It is the one thing that really brings me down Especially when it is heightened like it has this month My torodol shot two weeks ago helped for about the two weeks Because it's back This rubber band like snap starting at my left neck shoulder then an electrical snap to the top of my head it's the second time it's happened in this month OMG Trying to explain is a different issue However when I began to explain to my pain specialist he finished my sentence when he said it shot up into my brain And after it happens I feel as if I'm bruised internally Should this make any sense to anybody Pushing through The truth is pain is awful Just awful Scary when something new starts Now what I tell myself I pray on it But inside know my body like only Heavenly Father does So depressing thoughts begin and I have to counter it With my mind and doctors My hands and feet The doctors cannot figure out what is going on Hard to deal with that Today is a tough day My neck is hurting so I found myself on my back A big no no My body is propped so I cannot turn from my side to my back for the obvious reasons Hoping to get out of this funk soon Me
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someone who cares eva |
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"Thanks for this!" says: | PamelaJune (05-11-2017), RSD ME (05-13-2017) |
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