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Old 02-11-2017, 09:22 PM #61
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Pam,
I have been taking Amitriptyline for years. It works with the brain, etc...the brand name is Elavil; Amitriptyline is the generic name. I first started taking this with a Neurologist for my severe migraines. I took this with Inderal. This combo was as a preventative for Migraines.

I no longer take it for migraines; but up until last year was taking 25mg's; but talked with my Primary Care/Endorinologist and he was okay with my cutting the 25mg's in 1/2. I take this every evening 1/2 hr to 1 hr. before bedtime. It can make you a bit groggy early on.

But never experienced anything but the the morning groggy, which after a while is not very noticeable.

How are you doing about the gurgling sounds,/matter, etc.?


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Old 02-11-2017, 10:02 PM #62
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PamelaJune View Post
Friday 10th February stopped the Zoloft, not because of the angst I endured this week but because my PM went off his Nana when he learned I'd stopped the Endep and gone onto Zoloft. You cant take Endep with Zoloft. Zoloft prescribed by the GP to try & get the depression & anxiety under control.

Endep is a much older drug that provides a measure of pain relief (muscle relaxant) & is often used in cancer patients or those with chronic pain. It's also known as Amytriptaline and is known to help with psychiatric anxiety. I've taken it previously years ago for my severe back pain in the 1990's & eventually developed a tremor which is/was then a known side effect. (This tremor began back around 1996) I stopped the Endep & the tremor went away. I've been reluctant to take it ever since & on the occasions when specialists etc (in 01,2,3 & 4) insisted I take it (when the tumour kept growing back) the tremor would always return.

I explained all this to my PM last year & the year before & he was outright sceptical, said he'd never heard of such a side effect & in effect made me feel I was being silly to not agree to take to 10mg. So after pushing from him I began it again mid last year sometime. Sure enough the same sensation soon kicked in & in December I stopped of my own volition.

I tried to explain to him why I stopped but he was hell bent on believing the GP pushed the cessation so as to commence the Zoloft. The 2 were never related & never featured in our conversation other than when GP prescribed Zoloft the week before last & she said are you still taking Endep, I said no, & she said that's good you can't take Endep with Zoloft.

So long story short, I've stopped the Zoloft & started the Endep. Day 3 of no Zoloft, I've just been crying, read something in the news, can't now remember what and cried. The numbness feeling I had with the Zoloft is retreating. I can feel "me" coming back. I'm not sure if I will restart the Zoloft given the experience I had for those 6 days. I know it's hard to calculate given I've endured unbearable pain from this muscle spasm this week, but I was /am able to separate the feelings of pain from the feelings of numbness/irritability the Zoloft caused.

Let's all hope the Endep offers what he says it will, relief from this muscle spasm (hasn't worked so far) and the tremor on this occasion doesn't return. I should explain the tremor. You know when you put jewellery on, you put your necklace /chain on and bring the 2 ends together to open the clasp and join, or sleeper earrings in your ear and bring the ends together to "click" into place - when I try to focus and do those my hands began to shake and for the life of me I couldn't get the clasp to fix. Other little things, holding a fork on the way to my mouth the fork begins to shake. Now back in the 90's when this happened I thought I was getting Parkinson's or the beginning of an "Essential Tremor" I was so worried I asked my specialists and my GP - both of them looked up amytriptaline in the old "mims" book and there it was a known side effect. Stopped the amytriptaline & within weeks voila I could do my jewellery again. I know I did not imagine that, I know it happened & my DB agrees he remembers it as well.

So I'm back to square 1, the tears have returned, I feel my PM doesn't believe me, (it was like he implied the muscle spasm has come about as a direct result of stopping the Endep) and I'm in pain. SNAFU for those of you who don't dnow the term - Situation Normal All F##### Up. I'm going to deal with tears as a part of who I am for now, if it gets to the point like the week before where I need to go to a wellness retreat then so be it. I will just have to find $3k and DB will just have to cope. I'm sorry if I sound petty & mean, I don't mean to.
As you live in that body and have been put on meds that you clearly are in tune with and about
Your final assessment makes sense to me
As for the doctors who do the hypotheticals
I'm sure you have that under control
Not all know
I had two doctors who I respect
As in this particular situation doctors scratching their heads
Two were honest and out right said I have heard of what I'm going through but have zero knowledge of my condition
This is what I like
Let me know the truth
My respect to the two doctors
Honesty is the way to go
Amen
Be well
Love
Me
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Old 02-20-2017, 09:10 PM #63
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Tears are back, not like they were, but definitley back and I feel a much better normal than the week I was on the Zoloft. It's strengthened my resolution to not restart it. The tremor with the Endep has returned, I will just have to tolerate it as best I can. Not change jewellery, not such an issue as we rarely go out anyway nowadays and for work I just wear a simple solitaire diamond gold chain necklace, a gold & platinum watch and a Tiffany bracelet which has no clasp, just slide on and off. Sleeper earrings can remain. If I go out, I'll add a or swap out bracelets and DB can do them up. Mentally I'm not in a good place, I'm drained and sucking on energy from the pits of my soul.

My DB is struggling severely with all that's happening around him what with me & my chronic pain and this seemingly now more regular heart problem, his fellow DDO colleague & his rare illness, his fathers Parkinson's complications and now prostate cancer, his sister alcoholism, his DDDog1 aging & deteriorating fast, his favourite Abyssinian cat with possible cancer is just too much for him to bear, he likes to be in control of things, these are things beyond his control and I see now in the past when it's all become to much for him he's turned to his best buddy alcohol and everything suddenly seemed so much easier and bearable. Alcohol soothes his soul, I pray his 418 days sober can continue.
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Old 02-24-2017, 08:28 PM #64
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I had to take medical bills for reimbursement to my private health and government health on Thursday. My PTSD really impacts me when it comes to doing paperwork, ironically what used to be one of my strengths. I used to pay all our bills up front and then submit the paperwork for reimbursement, but somewhere along the way over the last 5 years it's gotten harder and harder & where possible I've utilised the system where the provider (doctor /surgeon etc) submits the bill to Medicare or Medibank & we just pay the gap and get a receipt for the entire amount showing who has paid what. I confess I also began to get confused with terminology 2 way gap, in hospital gap, provider fee and for those invoices I received by mail I paid the amount in full knowing it needed to be claimed back, but I couldn't determine which invoice was to be sent to Medibank or to Medicare or both. I tried a few times to make an appointment to see Medibank as Im driven by destination and times, if I have no set time I find it hard. I find it hard to deal with loud noises, lots of people, car parks, shopping centres in particular. Most Medibank & Medicare offices are based within large shopping centres and they will not make exceptions and make appointments for people. So I have delayed and delayed.

Finally, I knew I had to be in the city for work on Thursday so I determined where the Medibank & Medicare offices were located in relation to where my work appt was & straight after the meeting finished I went to Medibank. I got there at 11.50 am, no one within the building and a lovely man greeted me at the door & took me to his desk. I tried to explain I suffer with PTSD & began to cry, I pulled out the bag of invoices for reimbursement and his face fell. I apologised profusely with there being probably 3 years of invoice paperwork to process. I said to him, let's create a 3 piles, what is for Medibank that you can action, what is for Medicare that I can take to Medicare and what has already been paid & claimed can be binned. As he worked through the papers I could feel agitation rising, on occasion he would say this would have been claimable but it's older than 2 years, I kept whispering to myself let it go, just breathe, let it go. I was there for about 30 minutes. The sense of panic continued to rise and tears were flowing. He asked a few times if I needed water, no just tissues. We reached the point where I had to sign 3 different slips of paper. A tide of panic consumed me and within seconds I was struggling to breathe & trying desperately to hold it together & not vomit. We concluded the transaction and he said the reimbursements will be in our bank within 10'days. He suggested to me to come back to him from now on for any invoices I have & he will help. As I left he said well we got through it, I said yes with the added bonus of me not throwing up. .. went to Medicare and went through it all over again, only as soon as I stepped inside and a woman greeted me, I burst into tears and the panic was overwhelming, she grabbed a chair & slid me into it as I began to faint. She got water, and did the same as the Medibank chap did, processed what could be done, what needed to be binned & 2 accounts although she can see they have been paid, the invoice needs to show a zero balance. I got home about 2.30pm bordering on hysteria.

Tried to explain to DB how bad it was, ended up taking a whole Xanax. I took photos of the 2 invoices and emailed the respective providers requesting zero balance receipts to be emailed back. Got one back on Friday, I'm back in the city on Monday for work, will take the invoice with me & get it actioned at Medicare.

I knew I was bad, but had no idea I was this bad, the feeling of utter despair and struggling to breathe was horrid. Crying of course made me feel like a washed out dish rag & I'm sure I was a sight in the city with all the suited & booted immaculately presented ladies & me waddling along with my walking stick & tears just flowing non stop down my face. I will work hard on not letting paperwork build up like that again. Now I've just got to do the same thing with our tax returns for 2015/16. Fortunately our tax agent has been dealing with us for 10 yrs and knows all about my PTSD, she helps me enormously by sitting with me helping sort what papers / invoices need to go into what pile for claiming.
Consider me overwhelmed I guess. I tried to say to DB if you had been there you would have been shocked to see just how bad a state I'm in.
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Old 02-25-2017, 11:18 AM #65
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Pam,

Unfortunately, you are more than overwhelmed with so much going on in addition to the PTSD.

Wondering how much your going back to work has added to all of this. I think it was just a little over 2 years ago you went back into the work force. Along with your health issues, as well as DB's health concerns, you are dealing with caring for the house inside and out, as well as the animals, it's no wonder you are in such a state.

Thankfully, it appears you have met with a couple of good caring individuals at Medibank and Medicare. Hope and pray everything around you begins to come into focus and under control.

Gerry
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Old 02-25-2017, 10:21 PM #66
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Another day filled with tears, I'm feeling very down but I'm going to visit mum this afternoon. I haven't seen her since January when I took & paid for her & other family members out for afternoon tea at the revolving restaurant in the city. She is totally deaf in her left ear now and has only 20% hearing in her right ear so I can't speak to her on the phone anymore. When I lived in the UK I used to phone her every day, when I moved back to Aus I still did at least 3 times a week and saw her & dad regularly. After dad died she moved much closer to us (3 minutes) and I saw her at least 4 or more times a week, then 2 yrs ago she moved some 25 minutes by car away (actively encouraged by my sister) and now I rarely see her. She knew at the time of moving my PTSD limited me severely with driving but I don't think she really believed I was as bad as I am. I feel bad that I rarely see her, I can't talk to her on the phone and even though I have a difficult relationship with her, she is my mum and I love her.

I wish I could be my old me, took life in my stride and was the person everyone in the family turned to for resolution of their problems. Funny how when I need help not one of them is there to help me. If I was the old me, I could actively help myself....

One of my nieces made redundant last week, she rang and asked if I could help her with her CV and cover letter to apply for jobs. I did say I've not been well, I'm not sure if I'm up to it & her reply was yeah I know, heart problems... sigh, not really, heart was a complication, back problem is the long ongoing issue and that of feeling being used again.. anyway, she emailed it Wednesday afternoon & I've not had the will to even open it. I sent her a message this morning saying I'd got it and if I'm well enough I will try and have a look this afternoon. Not heard back.
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Old 02-25-2017, 11:42 PM #67
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Pam,
If you are in a position to take a Leave of Absence or even possibly resign your job. You are obviously in no condition to continue with this additional pressure. You might find it much easier on yourself, as well as DB if this was no longer in the picture.

Both of us are quite aware what the awful pain hikes do mentally. The concentration is next impossible. Sometimes when this happens, I can't even put together a clear sentence that makes any sense let alone have the responsibility of a job.

I have often wondered with all you have going on how you are able to work; especially since the last Bowel Obstruction. it has been one thing after another; root sleeve injections, epidurals and pain and more pain, physically and mentally draining.

You are in my prayers,

Gerry
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Old 03-01-2017, 05:02 PM #68
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I would like to take a week off of work, but I can't at present. There is lots of change sweeping through the company I work for. LOTS.... My direct boss has had a promotion from RSM & is now the COO. My colleague & I (we operate out of different states, she looks after 2 & I look after 3) subsequently are self reporting for 6 months. We believe in which time they will determine if the RSM role is to be replaced or absorbed by other departments. In essence we are hopeful to fly under the radar for as long as we can before some bright spark says these roles can go back under HR at which time there is a strong possibility we will be made redundant. HR are already asking lots of questions & we know it's only a matter of time. I went back to work to help pay off my mounting medical bills, working or not I would suffer the same health issues so while I can I will hang in there to keep the $ coming in. The COO only last week approved purchase of a colour printer, scanner come fax machine for me to have at home enabling me to work from here more often.

I had a long chat with DB & he will try to do more, it's hard for him I know, I can see he is not malingering or being lazy. I've tried leaving things on previous occasions, the dogs run riot & create extra work if we disrupt their routine. It's not worth the hassle.

We had a summer storm tonight, massive amounts of thunder & lightening with huge cracks of thunder going off within the count 1 1000 on and off for 4 hours. We had to bring DD4 inside as he was terrified, funny little big fellow.
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Old 03-26-2017, 04:53 AM #69
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The Last procedure hasn't worked, if I didn't know better I'd think I'm getting crps in the area, some days it just burns and touching it hurts and I get weird tingling sensations in it. But I think the tingling is the epidural trying to seep in. I'm just so tired, my tears are back & im exhausted.

My cousin is trying to coerce me into ketamine infusions which he's just having this week & has to spend 2 weeks in hospital. I've tried to explain ketamine is an unaccepted drug in our workplace so I'd have to have time off for the infusion & then time off for it to pass through the system & my understanding is you then go back for top ups regularly. He's on it because he has bad pain but he has become severely addicted to oxy, endone, fentanyl patches & Valium. Pops all of them like lollies. Makes me laugh sometimes when I'm trying so hard not to pop them. He had even doubled his patches for cross over recently.. I hope the ket works for him & I'm lead to believe the 2 weeks in hospital is to gently detox him from all the other stuff.

Have I got my understanding of ketamine infusions wrong? Surely it's not just a one off lifetime event.
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Old 03-26-2017, 11:01 PM #70
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Pam,
I am sorry once again the Epidurals didn't help. Early on, my PM did a series of Epidurals which did nothing for me; but unfortunately increased irritability. The only thing that helped lessen the pain making it a bit more tolerable is the pain meds.

Your cousin does sound like the pain meds are a bit "out of control". There most certainly is a difference in taking the meds for pain control and overstepping to addiction.

I am prescribed the two Oxycontins in the a.m. and one in the p.m. That's the total Oxycontin for the day. I originally had been prescribed 2 in the a.m. and 2 in the p.m. I, tirated from 2 in the p.m. to 1 in the p.m. several months ago.

Also, am prescribed a max of 4 Percocet for break thru daily; but take only two per day; once in a while I may take a 1/2 of a third if the pain is too bad. I want to get by on the least amount and still maintain some control over the pain.

Unfortunately, as you are well aware, the constipation is the result. My taking 4 full doses of Miralax daily, which BM's are almost more of a thick liquid; but it so far has prevented getting backed up. When I am unable to take the 4 doses and take 3 doses of Miralax; I start having to force which I know I need to get back up to the 4 doses immediately.

It would seem Ketamine is not an option for you. It appears Ketamine is ongoing and not just a one time thing. I am not inclined to even try it.


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