Hello Forum,

Last night in bed it was hot and I had trouble sleeping. I had a nasty flashback. It was about a series of incidents that began on 9th December, 2010. 5th Anniversary, almost.

I got out of bed that day, suffering from seizures and psychosis. The psychosis made me think I had gone out, went to a hospital appointment instead of cancelling, with all sorts of weird delusional stuff happening. I had a number of delusional memories like bashing an interstate psychiatric team and putting my arm around a stranger (a girl I hope!) and kissing her. I believed I had snuffed cocaine and wanted to jump off a roof of a construction site, so had the memory of running in, doing my poos and spews in the 'building', when I was probably doing it in my home toilet. I wanted to bash my former boss for sacking me and felt guilty about using a brick 'over his head' so I tried to climb the gates of the local prison when they didn't find me guilty/let me in.
The seizures made me partly unconcious, fall out of a chair in my bedroom, get migrane symptoms such as feel upside down with my head going towards the ceiling, a horrible process going through my head, hallucinations and having tonic clonic convulsions when coming out of a toilet or bed.

Anyway, back to the trauma involving my sister. I had a nap that day, I awoke in the afternoon, got out of bed, then had a tonic clonic seizure with my door shut. I went semi-unconcious, started panting, making sounds, frothing at the mouth, things went partly black and I fell to the floor; bashing my head against the carpet ground.
My sister thought I was having Tourette tics so she yelled at me to stop which made me leap into the air, frightened and I "snapped out of it". I had relentless breathing, tried to yell at my sister, she walked into the bedroom, although I was behind the door, I slammed the door into her face and criticised her. I think I was going psychotic/aggressive at that time, I opened the door, rammed into her, saying I'll sue her and she kneed me in the balls.
My sister doesn't acknowledge that I've ever had a seizure. Although, she doesn't stop me from having tics anymore.
What do I do? I don't have the money to leave home. My Dad just says its my psychotic false memories/thinking and says it didn't happen. How do I solve this?

Hi dyspraxia,

You need to see a neuropsychatrist who can do some testing on you to see what area of your brain is causing these problems along with seeing the area of your brain that is triggering the seizures. Have your family Dr. refer you to see one and they can help you out. In the meantime start taking vitamin B12 1000 mcg. once a day and this will help calm your nerves.
I wish you only the best and May God Bless You,

Sue

Hi Sue,

I see a neurologist/Epileptoligist in one and a psychiatrist that knows a lot about the neuro side of things. The neurologist ordered a MRI and an EEG and reviewed a CT scan from an interstate hospital. The MRI was normal, although my neurologist says that my brain did show an odd structure and was larger than normal. The EEG was normal, but I can't remember the circumstances it was performed under. The CT scan was done under mental health circumstances, because I went violent in a psychiatric ward, and it showed a lot of green and red colours/colors. I asked if the red meant anxiety and the staff said yes.
My psychiatrist now believes the traumas are a combination of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder symptoms or Delusional Memories. I can get Obsessed by some of the memories aswell, as they linger and change shape or form. I'll take the B12, thankyou.

Although, I was hoping a forum member could help me with my previous questions:
1) How do I deal with my sister and my family in general when I revist the issue?
2) How do I convince my Dad it was a real memory? He just thinks they're all false/delusional ones.
3) How do I prevent my self from running away from home? I don't have the money to leave and I'm all set up at home with people/friends visiting me there.

Hi dyspraxia,
I am wondering if you are having complex partial seizures, the reason I say this is because I start seeing colors flash back and forth in my eyes at the beginning of the seizure then I blank out.
Have you had a PET or SPECT scan done? This will show a lot more detail of what is going on in the brain. PTSD can really effect some people really hard with having flashbacks, my grandfather had them from WWII.

The best way to deal with your sister and family is to be open about the problem and explain to them what is going on. I've done this with my family and friends and it has helped them understand me much better.

You Dad needs to speak with your Dr. or see a medical report from your Dr. so he will realize this is all true and he needs to face up to the matter and be supportive.

To stop yourself from running away from home think about other people in this world who have things in life a lot harder than you do. I saw my aunt with MS, and she couldn't walk, along with working with students in school who were in wheelchairs for life do to medical problems. This woke me up and made me realize how lucky I am and that the seizures aren't lasting.

Here's wishing you only the best and May God Bless You,
Sue