I was diagnosed as a teen
Not many problems till my late 20s and it hit me like a train
I went out of state to a specialize in this o you have had fibro chronic pain chronic fatigue you whole life
Good or bad im not sure explains always sore but otc took care of it back then
But I could never build up like others got used to and worked in to jobs I never could over 100 plus jobs
Fam jobs lazy worthless not trying
So began the sick game of the more pain must mean less lazy
One job a 500 plus pound spot wielder on a overhead crane
One day crane broke ripped my arm out and elbow
I finished my shift
A gym teacher once taught us by kicking our well and saying ***** take it like a man
So many jobs so many story sod damage on damage alarm officer shot stabbed and hit on highway helping broke down by a drunk his door and mirror nailed me I went to work
Now my 30s sleep apnea I don’t get pain reduction or new energy often more pain
I had 3 very bad accidents the worst a kid pulled from a cross street were doing 60 on highway nails side
Forget how many spins
The couple years later waiting in line for a car to turn a chick rear ends us over 45 mph no brakes
My local fire screwed up supposed to flex door and slide board under me
Nope about a hand from me drug me on my lower bad grind then slip
I had lower back problems forever 30 chiros all pointed to it
My current chiro finally found what I was looking for a good chiro
He said hard to describe fubr moves to much
My whole life I hide in a corner if pain got to much wimp men don’t show or whimper
Well that rear-end I surprised my wife the names cussing and grunts
Then the er doc was one I had fought with before no drugs
My 40s 10 is a joke my counselor said it best there scale is below yours
I dream of a 9 or 10
I cant take this hidden hell druggie abuser cut off lists passed to all hospitals
My er had security throw me out because I asked doc to sign refuse to treat as under patient rights crap
They threw me out cant go back
The names the labels the laughing
Because adhd martial arts and the sick game from jobs
I sit and smile till I pass out they think fine but its not its unbearable do something stupid hell inside
Its challenges hills fights and im starting to loose
And boxing is winning to I just lost my IT band ER doc says carpal tunnel and damage pt may help or manage no it don’t I tried
It started in my thigh its like a giant knife stabbed deep and left
Stairs getting up from a chair car so much hell I see stars and have to scream or cuss
I made noise that embarrassing public is seeing and hearing
I watch people fix my car I know how I watch her do lots of house work
Furnace freezer internet in the basement my leg wont allow it I fell once
Then a knee beaten shot hit etc the IT goes from my thing to the bad knee
I cant walk much without a hinged brace it puts thigh pressure on so I can move a tiny bit extra
Like a whinny child I scream how much more is this funny a joke
Im in prison a hidden hell oxy fent lyrica loosing affect only the very strong controlled delodid
My body wont build a tolerance its worked forever but doc wont give
Thinks oxy will help oxy is candy
O and adhd also body is screwed up I don’t get addiction I have stopped oxy for months at times same with others they cant figure it out
When I go in for test that they put you out they have to get a special one or I wont go out
As a kid and other times in life burns and crap to my hands feeling is gone I know im touching
But what and how it feels I used to break glasses till I got the hang of it I broke it and it didn’t bother me
I have to be told I cut myself when working on stuff
I dream my wife’s silky hair my cat I want to feel
I also have a gland dying in my brain I got migraines I would hide curl up and pass out
Pretty god drugs managing them and how bad when I do get them
Im 40 I cant take it anymore its getting to be to much my wife and cat is all im here for
Then I feel so week and whinny Jesus suffered more I knew a lady from Australia lupus and fibro I read about it lupus basically eats you
Yet positive and dealing
Who am I to whine or wuss out of being active if these and worse our vets
All can yet I watch more and more of my life I can fix that why is he
Yet day after day this hell gets worse im a fighter im stubborn why am I in my recliner
I need to move I have to walk the park the store with her
I feel so weak and worthless so many worse and im loosing my fight
Its so horrible I wish I knew how to cry or scream when I scream for my leg its cuss or a very strange sound I have never learned o know how to express pain just hide it
And with age my jobs my ex-wife boyfriend beating me with a steel bar my child hood
Day week after week like knives they get worse and it keeps trying to win and hold me down
It makes the more I fight more I hurt
Im so ashamed of not being stronger fighting harder maintaining positive all the time
So many worse off if they can why cant I I feel like isolation in prison a closet
They cant see my hell and wont help or believe me because I hide it
My wife’s sisters wedding even with oxy I don’t remember I was there but what was it she said I passed out
I just don’t know anymore I just don’t know with the new IT band on top of it I just cant im loosing and makes me so mad
Im in a invisible hell and running out of help docs and pain killers
The specialist told me he cant help my fibro cant help my migraines
Just out of options my doc pretty much the same out of time and out of help

you are not alone. I am pretty much in the same boat except from a brain injury. My doctor this morning told me I had fibro from the head injury. I fainted in his office. I am 46 very overweight and home everyday and not working. Well I have as my girlfriend and my cat and the people I met on this board. I tell u what u keep fighting and I'll keep fighting and we will keep searching for answers.

thanks so much im 6.3 320 weight is hard when we cant be active

i always make my wife mad i hide it and go on errands shopping bills etc till she see or hears one of my give away woman is like a blood hound

you take my life away you will not take my activity or getting out

i have sit there and watch a shop fix my car i know how to do that

i have to beg people to help fix household stuff i know how

i dont know how much positive i have left or i can take watching my life my loves my hobby's stripped away from me

i got a porch of tools it burns to see because i cant use them

i fixed our car when shops said it couldn't be done 2 hour job turned into 5 till and into night

i was out for a week

i tore our washer apart and fixed knocked out again for days

i helped wife's parents with bad tire you guessed it out more days

days out or watch my life stripped away i will take more pain and days out

there taking everything and i cant stop i do mild exercise walk or house work

there still stealing my life

the one that if i knew how to cry i would have tried fixing tail light bulb took half hour for five min or less job

just a bloody bulb i pay cashier 3 days

then i watched my shop replace the other side in a min or so

i cant take this i cant take my hobbies my loves being taken like being robbed

i pay for what i used to do

i lost count of brake jobs i rebuilt 3 engines a clutch wiring

i was networking great with wires connectors now my hands lock like claws at times and docs dont know why

i have very sever arthritis symptoms but all test are negative

i dont eat processed food only home cooked awesome wife

i drink distilled water diet caffeine free pop once a week or less

shes diabetic so im on a diabetic diet

it all help but not as much of a difference as it does for others

vitamins v8 wont work on my body for some reason

im whining sorry its just so hard loosing my loves and being rubbed in my face as someone else does them

ok positive i can sill walk drive get out each day is what decides how much

thats it

im getting wore out loosing everything medicare wont fix my sleep machine a fight for two years involving congress rep a senator

no one can help my state took most all my medical i want to quit

i long for peace i have a few one here like you the rest just ignore me

that burns so bad but i try to get past or stop forums but i long for support contact talk or people going through the same or worse to give me a kick

you know like watching all my hobbies leave it hurts so much to got to forums

one im on 99 views no answers or they know my name and ignore

i used to fight now i just mark the wall and add another i cant to the long list

it get hard two forums in one day one said trolling when just normal posts on i upset the group with my bad skills

i can google forums and like movie or book store been there been there and on and on

and then the few in life left or played a game that cost me 4

my road seems to be telling me it supposed to be a solitary life and road i just cant except it and sneak back when i know what will happen in the end at least this disability site fights to try to not ban you thanks admins appreciated

i dont know today is a very unbearable day and my depression disorders are acting up bad

i hate whining i hate reaching out i hate sharing and opening up burned me so many times in life and the net

i dont know it been long time since i recently cam back

but i dont share the 10 or more problems all working as one

but im at a breakdown point im at a call the cops like in the past point

got swat once im ready to just tell my counselor do shrink commit and drug the crap out of me or i will do stuff to make you

i just dont know anymore my cat my wife all thats not stripped away

ar all that keep the thin line of not doing the above above

I hope you two are feeling stronger and happier soon.
I was reading another post here in fibro and saw this thread.

I'm sorry you're feeling so down, sickofbeingsick.
Please don't think you're being ignored or not wanted here.
The number of views on a post doesn't really mean much.
There are bots that view forums too and sometimes people
just don't know how to help or what to say.

as I said... feel better soon!

feel free to vent. I will check the fibro room every so often to see if you've posted. maybe you should see new doctors and keep trying different things. we both have to

nk you both my depression is better today it don’t last long now that I have treatment and what I need
I also got more pain pills and that helps have to be positive about every little thing
I just worry im not trying or working hard enough
So many worse accomplish more I feel like im wimping out
We went to her family reunion and wow those low sitting fold up fabric chair things
I got stuck every time
I also get so scared my time is running out
My leg is worse every day but I push and refuse to let it win
Unlike fibro it fights back nasty and hard but im feeling positive
I got out I walked I moved and even went to walmart
But my lower back and my leg made me go to the car
I have gone to the next state over and do have the best you can in tis area my doc fights druge because he cares and always blood test keeping up with meds
The specialist was same place
Its not so much bad o neglectful treatment as it is there out of options
At 40 my long list of docs and 11 years or so with them its like the rheumatologist
We have tried everything and were out of options
That’s a hard one to hear make you feel like some form of death
Eventhough iknow its not it’s a good way to explain how it feels
I have finally broke the camels back and cam to the end of the medical road
I wont accept defeat I wont stop asking my doc for only pain med that works
Cant help me I will help my self I found the best chiropractor in my life
He helps and it lasts a couple weeks he focuses on how far can we start making appointments
Im in ways glad to be at the end because that mean o we never saw that bofre or now you have tih or that prol
Im sorry to forum and members it wasn’t respectful
Its hard im at a age I pretend not to care pretend to be able to live without any contact
Life or the net I used to cause big wars now sad thing I come I try I am nice and curtious and others to make up for my post downfalls
And without fighting im banned two the other day
So I hope everyone can forgive me I get really paranoid and wait and watch for the hammer to hit
I never thought or remembered about bots and me I just ask come forward I honor anything asked with manners and respect I just want a place to stay

Thank you all so much for support and help I hope you have a good week

its good that you got out and are trying new procedures. your posts are not disrespectful and you seem like a nice guy who is suffering. we can relate to that and looking for new answer we can relate to also. I have been home on the couch seven years. it is hard.