Thank you to everyone who has responded to my post. After a few days of serious depression I realized I was going though withdrawal from cymbalta. The idea my husband wanted to divorce me was all just in my head. This is why I hate antidepressants, the withdrawal from them makes me feel like I am insane. I'd rather go though withdrawal from painkillers than antidepressants.

I'm also slowly accepting the fact that if I need to take painkillers it's not such a horrible thing. I have a weird issue with taking drugs probably since so many doctors have treated me like a drug addict for asking for medication to help my pain. Like I broke my spine and had two failed fusions just to get drugs.

The compounding cream I have does help and now I have a prescription for Tramadol which doesn't fully relieve the pain but is good enough to help me get though work. It's hard for me to accept the fact that this is a permanent condition and I will have to rely on meds for the rest of my life. But I realize my only options are to feel bad about it or do what I can to manage the pain and try to live my life.

Thanks and good luck with the sailboat ride! My husband keeps saying that my limitations don't bother him but then at times he clearly gets annoyed when I don't feel like going out. I've been encouraging him to go with with his friends more, I don't want him to have to limit his life because of me. But then I get insecure and jealous when he goes out without me so it's something I am still trying to deal with emotionally.

What has so far been a decent solution is us having a date "night" on the weekends. I feel totally useless during the week since work takes so much out of me but at least on the weekend I am usually doing well enough to go out to dinner or do a short hike. I've also started watching pro wrestling with him since it's something he likes that I can share with him even if I'm not feeling well.

You are so right. The hardest part of dealing with our painful issues is "acceptance". Although there will still be days that the thought of living life on these terms are difficult; we still need to do whatever necessary to live life the best we can. I am grateful there are meds available to help accomplish this.


Gerry

we are two peas in a pod. I tell my girlfriend the same thing and then I getsad when she goes out lol. find it so hard to get out because of the pain but I guess we both must try to do our best. the worst thing is the fear of the [pain. I never feared anything in my life really but I fear the pain. I hope you get relief as you sound like a really nice person

She does not understand if you are yourself or not.Try to explain it is not your fault and she will understand you.As long as you love her try about it.I am really in love with my man,but I do not feel he loves me anymore...All the rest is ****...

Tina I am sorry. I do not know how your man it feels but I have been in relationships where I loved a girl very much and she didn't love me back and it was brutal. I wish you the best of luck and only a man who repays the love deserves your love

i am so sorry you are feeling this
it isn't fair
i'm so sorry
me

now that was beautiful

I'm sorry to bring this up again but my husband just told me he's upset at me for not not being able to go out. He has been out at bars & restaurants every night this week but I don't go out with him because I can barely get through work and by the end of the day I'm in so much pain I have to lay down. He gets in late and I have to get up early so I haven't seen him all week except tonight. I feel really hurt because it seems like he doesn't understand how difficult it is for me to work both full time and have a part time job to support both of us. Is it too much for me to expect someone who is healthy to understand how hard it is to have chronic pain? I would like him to be supportive of me at least emotionally but maybe I am being unrealistic.