NeuroTalk Support Groups - Finding me again after 25 years

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- - Finding me again after 25 years (https://www.neurotalk.org/general-mental-health-and-emotional-support/250324-finding-25-a.html)

Quote:

Originally Posted by PamelaJune (Post 1262455)

I’m not sure work wise Gerry, apparently I’m doing a good job and they want me to stay on, I just deal with one day at a time, it’s impossible to plan with so much happening in the organisation.

DB, last month I told him it was over, finito, finished and cut all contact. My actions must have scared him into facing reality.

He has moved home this weekend and i have agreed we will go to counselling. Time will tell. I didn’t want him to move back home, and repeatedly told him to stay where he was but as I have found out, I couldn’t prevent it. He is in a very dark unreadable place, suicide is a reality and life remains difficult.

I must be an unusual person, moving back here, all that he bought has come with him, seeing the things he bought to set up home has really revealed to me how manic he was in his behaviour. I can see he had hopes and dreams for a different life and I can find it in my heart to feel sad for him those dreams were unreachable.

I can’t shake the feeling his moving back here is for him to get his life back on track. From the day he left and said he wanted a break, he’s not gone a single day without attempting to contact me. Perhaps he sees me as his lifeline, but one thing I do know, and I’ve made it clear. I am not the woman I was. If he wants to live here, he has to live with who I am now. If he can’t deal with that, tough luck. his actions helped me find me again.

Amazing how true it is
To go through all that and find that person that has always been in there
You are who you are for YOU
that’s the difference
He must accept that
Like it or not
Lovely lady
So proud you got there
Enjoy life on its terms
The only way to do it all
Much love
Me

Living a comfortable life remains a challenge, working full time is hard, but I am enjoying the work I do. Once I get the admin support sorted I believe it will improve.

DB spent an hour with the GP on Tuesday and has finally gone back on his medication.

I reported Miss BO to the police last night after more harassment and subsequently realised a post I once made could allow her to know so much more about me. I’m going to write to admin and see if it can be edited. If it can’t be, I may have to cease using NT.

Fingers crossed 🤞

I am pretty sure that the Admins will agree to edit your post or move it off the public part of NT if you would prefer that.

:hug:

Whew, they can edit it. Chemar is my life saver

Quote:

Originally Posted by kiwi33 (Post 1262754)

I am pretty sure that the Admins will agree to edit your post or move it off the public part of NT if you would prefer that.

:hug:

I’m going home

Didn’t think I would ever go back, but here I am at the airport ready to fly to the UK. Father in Law very unwell, flying home to help resettle him. Will be the last time I see him alive, prognosis not good.

Life has moved on, my contract been extended for another 3 months, rumour has it I’m required to stay on. One day at a time.

Pam, that sounds encouraging about your job.

Your trip to England won't be easy. As ever, my thoughts will be with you.

:hug:

Gosh it’s tough, poor old dad remembers me but forgets who DB is sometimes. SIL is creating so many difficulties and went off at me on the phone yesterday. I’ve said to the brothers don’t ask me to answer the phone again, nor open the front door. She says to me what she wouldn’t dare say to them and I’m biting my tongue to say nothing. I’m here to support DB, his father and brother in whatever decisions they make for his best care. I got blamed for his dinner going dry, food she says is more important than him having his medication and a shower. He hadn’t washed in 3 days under her care nor had a change of clothes. He has an infected toenail which may need surgery if we can’t get it right.

It is good that the brothers are stopping SIL from giving you aggro.

:hug:

It’s so much worse than we were led to believe. DB down at his house again tonight, he stayed there Sunday night but here at BIL last night and dad spent the night out roaming goodness knows where, the state of his clothes, he’s fallen, he’s been in mud up to his knees, cuts all over his arms and one leg (amputee 25 yrs ago) we took him to the GP this afternoon and back for bloods in the AM. I’ve made an appt to try to get him on the transfer list to move, and he wants to move. SIL in riot mode over it, making it all about her...yet where is she when he’s out wandering, passed out without a care. BIL on the verge of a breakdown, took yesterday and today off, wages he sorely needs. It’s a sad and sorry mess. I checked his bed, he hadn’t even been in it. We’ve thrown his shoes and shirt out, the trousers will be salvageable after a wash but so much mud, he must’ve been in the creek somewhere...all he can say is he hopes he’s not in trouble or hurt anyone - so sad.

Quote:

Originally Posted by PamelaJune (Post 1265684)

Pam,
I didn't realize your father in law live alone. If so; it appears he might need to move to a care facility. If SIL is so concerned about a move, maybe she would like him to move in with her. Situation with SIL does not sound good.
Very sad.

Gerry

Gerry