Hi Darwayne

Welcome to NeuroTalk .

Some thoughts which I hope may help:

From what you have written I think that your language skills are very good. The parts of the brain which do language are in a number of places so the probability of a lesion in any of them is small.

You use the term "visual meaning" or similar to describe not being able get a visual image of a word or concept. One of your examples is "hyperventilation". When I typed that word I did not need to use an image of somebody breathing very deeply to know what it means.

This fits with what we understand about use of language - it has been described as "words and rules"; some parts of your brain store words and other parts which do not totally overlap use rules to combine them into well-formed written or spoken sentences. This is a more detailed explanation of why I think the language modules in your brain are fine.

You said that you used high doses of THC for an extended period. I don't think this is a good idea. At your age your brain is still developing. I am not meaning to scare you but at your age prolonged use of high doses of THC is a risk factor for schizophrenia.

Hi Kiwi,

Thank you for the thoughtful reply! Yes, I may explain it poorly sometimes because I truly don't know exactly what I'm missing. All I can explain is the situations in which it effects me.

For language, my speech did indeed get worse verbally but not drastically. The only effects I've noted are I can't talk as fast as I used to and I certainly can explain anything complex because if I can't rap my mind around it or understand it myself, I likely won't be able to explain to soundly to others.
The only other speech effect I noticed was I struggle to find the word I'm looking for for words typically with 6+ characters.

I think a better take on the "hyperventilation" subject would be... Maybe it isn't a visualization of someone actually hyperventilating that I should be getting but when I hear or say the word, it's just a word for me. When you hear or say it, is it just a word or does your brain instantly create meaning for the word based on your understanding/experience with it? A flash of meaning goes along with the word for you so you don't have to stop and figure out what it means each time right? It's just a word for me until I stop and make myself visualize someone being in the water, then I will try to think of them breathing heavily and step by step, I'll give understanding to what hyperventilation is. See, if on the spot you asked me what hyperventilation is, I could tell you the definition. Little to your knowledge (not directed at you, just the person that asks me), in my head I'm not following along or producing substance of what I'm saying so it hyperventilation still won't make sense to me.


Another good example could be using the shifter in my car. It's automatic but any time I go into manual mode, I have no grasp or understanding on why I should go up or down gears. I understood the hell out of it back in freshman and sophomore year of high school when I used to drive my friend's 4wheeler and my first car. If I decide I want to go into first gear, I don't have any memory or association with "1st gear" from the past that gives me meaning for what 1st gear is for. I'd have to stop and try to figure out what 1st gear's use is the same way I'd have to wit hyperventilation. In 2 minutes, when I want to go into first gear again (if I want to understand why I'm going into 1st gear) I have to stop and think hard about what 1st gear is for again.

Sorry for the long text. It's just so difficult to explain and such a mystery. I know marijuana has its risks like any pharma meds. I personally don't think either are particularly good; that's why marijuana is my last resort and I haven't just given up and signed up for medical license here in FL. But if worst comes to worst, I'm going to do what I have to do. I'll do everything I can to find a cure before that

It sounds as though the connection between the visual memory and the word itself is interrupted.


To say one doesn't have to picture it to know what it means I think in part is true because when you self analyze you can find the meaning but I think with everyone else that the visual comes with the word but is so fast that we don't realize it. Like imagining a smell. We know what lemons smell like and for a fleeting moment we can see and smell them when we think of them. It is automatic.


It reminds me of those people who cannot recall what happened five seconds ago.

I am going to tell you something and many people are going to disagree but first of all only adolescents are really at risk for schizophrenia from OVERUSE of marijuana and all medications have risks. You could do far, far, worse on prescription meds.


do not quit searching for an answer but if the CBD capsules, or wax, or flower help you then use it. It was put here for a reason and has been used safely for thousands of years. Find yourself a good caregiver who will help you with types and dosages. find a holistic doc that will help you also. I know you want it as a last resort, there is such a horrible stigma. Up to you of course. If you do CBD capsules there is no THC or at best trace amounts, so you do not get 'high' but the cannabinoids do their work. Now me I love my wax and flower and occasionally do heavy indica medibles in the evening to help with sleep and the THC and the CBD help me with anxiety, severe bipolar II depression, premenstrual dysphoria, menopause, insomnia, migraines, IBS and some types of pain.

Wow, you actually hit the nail on the head. I've tried to explain it to so many people but that's the part I have trouble getting past. Most people say they don't get a visual with words or idea. That's why I say "automatic" flash or visual you get going along with the word. It just brings your previous experience or association of that word to light as soon as you hear/say it. Gives the word meaning for you automatically.

Honestly, I have no issues at all with marijuana. I'm just trying to cater to others' opinions when it comes to forums. I've noticed many on health forums don't entirely agree with it. Certain health forums don't even let you speak of marijuana unless you're condemning it or discussing how you quit lol.

Trust me, I feel it's 10x better than most prescription meds. People have placed way too much trust in big pharma and I'm glad all that corruption is coming to light. We have hundreds of chemicals put in popular make ups and directly used products in the US that are banned from usage in many countries. It all comes down to $$$. I've done tons of research on marijuana and I do believe it's a big problem IF you start smoking too young. I've seen it turn people into losers for the rest of their life over and over again when they start in early high school while important brain development is still occurring. I don't see nearly as many detrimental problems caused by weed as I do from prescription drugs and a lot of people smoke weed now a days.

The only reason I want it as a last resort is when I was doing it, I still wasn't the same smart kid I was before. I was just in a much better, smarter place than I am currently. I also don't want to rely on something that will consume $$ monthly unless I have to. It also made it impossible for me to exercise and we all know how important exercising is. It effects everyone differently because I know tons of pot heads that exercise just fine. It made it so when I did something active, the muscles I used would hurt immensely for like 5 minutes after use. Like really, really bad pain, not soreness or anything (I have a high pain tolerance). Have you ever experienced that? The fact that I had been so inactive for like a year prior to that exercise wise could've contributed but it stopped happening when I quit.

Thanks for translating and understanding my issue. Going to use it to explain to people. It could help a lot!

This is speculation but I wonder if both of you have an unusual form of synesthesia, which is not a pathology.

Its most common form is colour synesthesia; "seeing" in your mind different letters and/or numbers associated with different colours - A might appear green, B might appear blue, 4 might appear red, 7 might appear yellow, etc. There are many forms of it; probably about 4% of the population experience it.

What you both experience, "seeing" a visual image of a word or concept could be a form of synesthesia.

Here is an article to kind of show what I mean

https://www.scientificamerican.com/a...-spoken-aloud/

That link is gold! Definitely a keep-sake for me. Thank you for finding that. I'm going to do some extensive & expensive testing for Lyme disease while waiting for my scheduled appt with a highly acclaimed neuro-psych nearby and am happy to have this link to show him. Could be very beneficial!

Thank you for helping a brother out lol. Seriously, very much appreciated. Hopefully this gives my doc some clues.

Glad to help . I have heard some really bizarre behaviors that can come from Lyme Disease, there are the 'sick' symptoms and then there are complete psychological change in personality. A good friend of mine has a sister that has lyme disease and she went from being a grade A student and great kid to a complete turn around in personality. Took a while for someone to think of checking for lyme disease, they were close to having her hospitalized but while they were considering one of her docs thought to test her. Thank God, now she is being treated. I have read that sometimes you have to do antibiotics for a really long time and often the 'quick' tests are wrongly negative.



If you will keep us posted. I am very interested in how you do. I totally get what you are talking about and think of your condition often. I hope you find something or someone that can help.