So, do any of you just get fed up with the aches and pains and just stop talking about them? I've had new symptoms "pop up" and I'm so sick of talking about this situation, that I don't even tell my husband. He's scared enough right now, why scare him more??? I don't want to be a heavy weight (no pun intended) to my family and talking about myself seems to add to that. I do log the symptoms though, just in case

I think I am the opposite with my husband. I tell him everything. I try not to be overly dramatic or whiney, but I do tell him if I am having a tough day. I stayed silent for a while, and he chased me wanting to ask me every 20 minutes if I was ok. Finally I said STOP IT! and he said "you first!" he told me he knew I wasnt feeling well and wanted me to rest, and was upset that I was pushing myself so hard.

For the rest of my family, they like to have competitions on who is sicker, so I say nothing! If you tell my sister you have a cold, she has the flu. If you have the flu, she has the swine flu. If you have cancer, she needs open heart surgery. sad, really sad. I keep telling her sickness isnt a competition, but she doesnt hear me.

I hope you are able to find some peace, and some rest.

I don't mention things much to 'outsiders', I figure we all have something going on, and the seriousness is relative - if the worst thing that happens to your sister is flu Dejibo, then it would seem bad to her. If you have never experienced really bad pain then you can only comment on what you know (and the upper limits of what you know seem bad to you). Does that make sense?

I learned that one after I had brain surgery - and people (wanting to be caring and sympathetic) related their experiences with headaches, memory loss and so on.

I will say this though, some people do get off on 'pity parties'.

If I don't share with my husband, he gets mad with me - but I figure I can't spend my life complaining either. The last thing I want is to be 'defined' by my physical condition.

Lyn

I don't mention too much to my kids because they just worry. Honestly, I don't feel like I have much to complain about. Yes, I do worry when a new sx crops up or an existing one gets worse but fretting about it doesn't help make me feel any better. I tend to just ignore what I can, try to recognize what shouldn't be ignored and be thankful for all that I have. Everyone's got something going on.......and some of it's much worse than my challenges.

Hey Butter, that's what this place is for..

Complain and whine all you want. You won't scare us. We support each other, no matter what.

it's good that you're journaling your sx's.
it's very hard to tell people how you feel if they don't have an inside scoop.
no matter how much you try they just don't fully get it.

we're good listeners and there's always someone here who will understand.
just think of us as your soft place to land.

For everyone except my husband I stopped talking about my problems and pain years ago. The only time I may mention something is when it is bad enough that I can't do something. I will tell my DH or DD if something is really bothering me so if I am short tempered they'll understand why.

Butter, I understand what you mean. I try not to complain because it gets old. I know the important people in my life get most of how I feel. So if they can't help me, why complain? I just grin and bear it.

If I get quiet my DH stays far away. He has learned I may bite. Quiet means leave me alone for now, I don't want to talk.

Fatigue is my biggest pain in the hind end. Sometimes I get invited to a party or functions and I know I just won't make it, so I have to decline.

I just say it's not a good day, or I may say I have an appointment that day at the doctors, if they are not living close to me. It's easier that way.

I don't talk about it anymore, to anybody. Nobody wants to hear it. Everybody has something worse so why bother? I try to make the best of if and count my blessings. It could always be worse. If you don't appear to be on death's bed then nobody is really concerned anyway. Why waste the breath of explaining or complaining?

IMO when most social friends (not good firends or certain family) ask how I am doing, they really don't want o know. They regret asking if I actually tell them I feel like crap. All they "really" want to hear is good news like "I'm fine." or "I'm better"

I find it less of a hassle to keep it quiet and let them live in oblivion. Plus, I don't have to hear about thier friend's great aunt sally who found a cure for the latest diet, snake oil, etc