NeuroTalk Support Groups - My MS group is stressful

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- - My MS group is stressful (https://www.neurotalk.org/multiple-sclerosis/137984-ms-stressful.html)

Wow, Lynn, really nicely said. I've always "known" this or tried to put it into practice...but the way you just stated it...was like a light switch was just really turned on for me. Thanks!!

I have decided to go to Tuesdays meeting, BUT I plan on talking to fussy pants to tell her that I am simply not able or willing to try to make every meeting. I am not going to pepper her with my reasons, I already have stated my reasons to her.

If I am not willing to put up with this malarky with my family, why would I continue to allow it from strangers? simply because they have MY disease and I want to make an effort? Well, effort has been made, and its costing me. I dont think this woman is a good leader, nor do I think she will last much longer. I am impressed she has lasted this long.

Oh, and the final thing that bugs me. She sells Avon, and every week I get an email telling me about the latest Avon bargains and how to order online using her name to give her credit. At one meeting she spoke at length about how hard it is to find ways to make money and spoke of how Avon is going to save her. Well, I dont wear jewels around the house. I dont wear make up, and I use a bath products from another place. I find Avon products to be ok, but just ok. I guess now Avon is selling clothes and Curves items too. I appreciate the position she is in, but dont like that she is using her co ordinator job as a rolodex to get avon clients.

so, Tuesday will be my last meeting with this current set up. Thanks for all the good guidance and encouragement. If the group dies, it dies. there is nothing I can do about that. :(

:circlelove::yahoo::I-Agree::You-Rock:

Dejibo - Atta Girl!!!!

Lead On!

Take that Bull by the Horns!

I'm way happy for you.

That is just not right of her to be trying to sell Avon. Or anything else for that matter. That should not be in the picture at all:mad: She doesn't sound like any kind of a support group leader to me. Stick with your plan. I wish you well.:hug:

Dej, I understand. Our local group started in 2004 and went strong for 4 years. Then we had newbies join that didn't ask questions. Instead they just complained about other things in their lives instead of talking about their MS difficulties.

The leader got discouraged and quit. The new leader didn't know how to contain this sort of complaining, so most of the oldtimers quit. Me included.

I found it was just better for my sanity to find online groups for my interests. Sometimes we just have to do what is best for us. I now only go to advertised events with doctors and speakers on the agenda.

too that the first support group leader we had would serve some kind of herbal or health kind of cookies. Needless to say, that did not go over and so we were served some "real" treats. Apparently nobody cared for the other. I do realize some people like the other.

And then besides that, the group leader was trying to sell that stuff. Nobody bit into that one either. I believe the group leader thought that this was going to cure or stop CMT in our case. The leader had another type of CMT (there are many types) and boy, did the person ever go downhill in a short period of time. Finally, after going thru much grieving, that group leader had to accept the inevitable and realize that there was really nothing that was going to stop the progression. Sad but true.:(

WAY TO GO DEJ!!!! IMO, it sounds like you've made the right decision. As we've all learned from having this miserable disease, we can't "fix" everything and sometimes the opinions of others just makes things worse. That's the time to just walk away.

When I was diagnosed in 1990, I attended a support group in the nearest city......maybe three or four times. Seeing so many with more advanced MS, was very depressing for me. Now that I'm in that same boat, I don't have the energy or desire to participate again. Like Sally, you all are my friends and support. We can come and go as we please, not at any set time. Everyone "gets it" and we feel free to talk about anything pertaining to MS.......or not -- in the Stumble Inn! :)

I am relieved "for" you! I was feeling a little stressed...and I'm not even there. So glad you have worked through this in your own mind....now stick to your guns! ....and I agree that she shouldn't be using the ms groups as a platform for selling her Avon.....really? seriously????

Let us know how the meeting goes. Good job!!!:hug:

Tomorrow is the day! I have been rehearsing my attitude, and my speach of what I what and how I want to say it. I promise to not lose my cool because she is using this group as a way to sell avon. I think its unethical to poach this email list to bombard us with avon flyers every 3 days.

The DH leaves for a long hunting trip tomorrow, so I am stressed already, and dont want to head out to this group, when I could spend a few hours with him, but this needs to be done. DH is going to leave at the same time as I do in the AM and I may be late, but will show up and end this madness.

I have gotten it down that I am telling her IF there is a speaker of great interest to me i will TRY to show up, but if not, I am NOT going to be the anchor for this group simply to keep it alive. If it folds it would actually take pressure off me, because I wouldnt have to worry about going anymore, anyway. HA!

Thanks for all the support. :grouphug:

I went to a few of the meetings at the local group in my area, those people are really suffering from depression. Just not my kind of party. :eek: oh no were all going to die! :)