Wow! I didn't realize how many of you were going through a similar experience. It's a combination of denial and grief; denial that this is happening to us and grief for our old selves.

So far, the techniques that I am learning from my counselor and opening up more are working. I have to self talk a lot but am directing it my thoughts in a positive ways. Reminding myself that this is just the way it has to be and to not fight what my body is doing.

Another example . . . I love sitting in the living room with DBF early in the a.m. We drink our coffee, watch the news, talk, etc. It's a nice peaceful time. This morning my legs just did not want to be in a sitting position and they clamped up. Instead of getting frustrated or upset, I just told DBF that I needed to go back to lay down and stretch my legs out. I came back to my room, self talking A LOT all the way there, and got myself situated on the bed. It was a tough, but I made it through with out beating myself up and causing myself more stress, tension, and even anxiety.

I hope we all find some peace and acceptance in all the craziness MS brings us.

Good for you, Tricia.

Ya know......why do we stress so over the fact that things do not stay the same? Our health, our lives, our weight, our job situation. All these things are going to change. It's inevitable. Some will change positively....others not so much. But, It's our ability to "go with the flow" and make adjustments to our attitudes as well as our physical selves that will determine how much enjoyment we get out of our lives.

This thread and all the responses has helped me immensely.

To be honest, the first thing I did after my diagnosis was seek counseling. It really helped put things in perspective......BUT
it all comes down to this:

God give me the strength to accept the things I can not change, courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference

That is so true! I wonder if there is a 12-Step program for MS. I don't know much about the 12-Step Program, just it's effectiveness. I am sure you can apply it to MS. They apply the same concept to many other things/support systems. I know several people who go to Al Anon meetings for support as they have family members or friends that are addicts. They have a name for the group, I just can't think of it right now. They all love going to these meetings and have told me that the concept applies to so many areas of our lives. A couple of them even told me to just attend one as you can learn so much at them and the group is so dang active! They are always doing something. (Very unlike the MS support groups here in town).

I guess I need to read up on it and come up with an MS 12-Step Program plan.

wow... when I started reading your first post it reminded me of a line from the Big Book of AA:
"And acceptance is the answer to ALL my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation- some fact of my life- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that, person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment."
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The 12 step program can be used in any way you desire. In the early 70's, I started using it as a tool to improve my life. I generally have to practice step 1 every time I leave the house and sometimes while at home Step 1: Admitted I was powerless over (alcohol/drugs/husband/MS/cat..)and that my life had become unmanageable... (what is 'unmanageable' differs for all of us)
amazing how just admitting to my self that I am powerless over other people places and things, and bring the focus back to what "I" can do to better my "Attitude" at the moment, really helps...
like driving down the road and coming up on that 'Sunday driver' doing 40 mph and I accept I'm powerless, turn it into an opportunity to practice positive thinking ("The universe has placed this person on the road to slow me down, I'm going to fast (emotionally/mentally/physically?) so i need to slow down and be more observant.

I fully believe that the more you practice 'acceptance' and do the things you can do--do your part, the better you will feel, Tricia. I commend you on recognizing your level of denial and the need for change. You are a remarkable woman

"I guess I need to read up on it and come up with an MS 12-Step Program plan."

Hey, we could even print up some Tshirts & create a secret handshake LOL

In all seriousness, you wrote what I am thinking in a much more elequant way than I ever could. Thank you

Viseeu - I had to giggle at your statement about practicing Step 1 every time you leave the house. Admitting we are powerless is so important. I guess I am on Step 1 of the MS 12 Step Program; admitting I am powerless to MS.

I found these 12 Steps online. They were adapted to general life issues and I just changed a few words to make it applicable to MS. Looking at these steps, I have done quite a few of them over the last month or so. Not necessarily in the order of the steps but different steps at different times.

The 12 Steps

Step 1 - We admitted we were powerless over MS - that our lives and bodies had become unmanageable.
Step 2 - Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity and healing.
Step 3 - Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood God
Step 4 - Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves
Step 5 - Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs
Step 6 - Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character
Step 7 - Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings
Step 8 - Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all
Step 9 - Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others
Step 10 - Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it
Step 11 - Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out
Step 12 - Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other MSers, and to practice these principles in all our affairs

It's very difficult if not impossible for me to make 12 real steps with my MS.

I am at a stage of acceptence, so I don't need the 12 step program, but I wish you luck with it and hope it brings you the peace of mind, you need..

LOL, Sally! There are days when it is difficult for me to make 12 real steps too. Hence, I am seriously considering a rollator and will be talking to my drs. regarding such. This is part of my new attitude and acceptance . . .acceptance that I need these things and that they will help me gain some of my independence back.

I am glad you are at the acceptance stage. Did things seem to get better once you got there? Well, in terms of less frustration and fighting of the symptoms?