[RedPenguins]

Hi all,

I'm not sure if anyone remembers me...I used to be here a lot in 2008-2009....then I went off to Hopkins and did HiCy treatment (2x!)....I had a baby 15 months ago and was in a nice long remission from May 2009 (second HiCy) until December 2011... then a relapse from hell hit me and it's been awful.

Started back on Copaxone and hated EVERY second of it. Cried every night when i had to stick myself as it hurt horribly and bled a lot (realized after a week that i had a bad box of needles!)....but even when I got a new box, I couldnt go back.

Found an MS guru about 2 hrs from where I live and went to see him. He runs clinical trials and suggested one to me, as my MS has always been aggressive (though the 2nd HiCy did bring much relief - as I was having relapses and new damage every 2 months prior to that)....

So - now I'm doing this study on Ocrelizumab. It's a double blind study with Rebif. I either get the Ocre or the rebif. Of course, being that rebif has terrible side effects - i will probably very quickly know which group i'm in (both groups have an IV drip - which would be the Ocre or the placebo and both groups shoot up with rebif or placebo 3x a week).

I have thought of many of you.....just never have the time these days, what with working full time and chasing around my 15 month old...and oh, MS rearing it's ugly head.

Anyhow, I'm not afraid of the Ocre med....but I'm PETRIFIED of Rebif. I've stayed clear of the interferons for fear of not only flu side effects - but also the depression. I already struggle with that and now I'm afraid I'm gonna be on a ledge, so to speak, if I actually do get rebif. I'm wondering if any of you are on Rebif or have experience. Pointers, hints? Are the flu like symptoms horrible?

I'm gonna go read threads to catch up on whats been happening here.

xo
keri
aka redpenguins