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Old 05-08-2013, 12:33 PM #1
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Default What Do You Miss Most About Your Pre-MS Self?

I miss a lot of things.....but I think what I miss most is the ability to be spontaneous. Just decide to go somewhere - and go.

Now, I have to weigh whether or not I will have the energy to actually enjoy being somewhere else. Will there be a bathroom nearby? Do I need my walker or cane? Or both? Are there stairs? Will there be alot of walking involved? Uneven terrain? Is it handicap accessible? The list is endless.

I'm grateful that I can still do things - even if it takes a lot of planning. But sometimes I just wish I didn't have to.
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Old 05-08-2013, 12:35 PM #2
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My confidence especially in my physical health and strength. My security blanket was that I believed no matter what I could always work hard and take care of myself.
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Old 05-08-2013, 01:49 PM #3
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When I read the question I immediately thought, "Spontaneity." Then I thought about it and added "Confidence."

Interesting how we think alike, Kitty & Jules.
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Old 05-08-2013, 02:35 PM #4
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I would answer that differently today than I would have yesterday, and might have yet another answer tomorrow. It depends. Spontaneity would probably always be in the top three, though, because it includes so many other "used to's".

Very closely aligned with that would be reliability. For the same reasons I can't do things spontaneously, I can't make commitments. I hate hearing myself saying, "I will if I can" and knowing I probably won't.

The first thing that came to my mind when I saw your question was...walking. I don't mean just getting around--I use a cane when I'm out and about, and I'm a wall-walker at home. And I'm thankful that I CAN still get around! But I miss walking around the lake, around the "triangle", to the school and back. I was always a walker.

Sometimes I'll randomly see someone just walking along the road or on a sidewalk--not jogging, not running, just walking briskly along with no cane, and I feel the tears well up. I mentally say to that person, "Don't take it for granted."

Today, that's what I miss the most.
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Old 05-08-2013, 02:53 PM #5
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I miss not working and being out and about. I miss not being able to do the things I used to do, normal things like shopping, gardening, etc. I miss being able to clean my whole house without having to take breaks or break it up in to days. I too miss the spontaneity of life.

Jules had a great answer as well. I miss having the confidence in my physical ability to do normal activities. I don't have confidence at all in my abilities (physically and cognitively).

I miss my shoes!!!! I miss wearing pretty heels and dressing up. Shoes can make an average pair of jeans look extraordinary, a "humble" pair of pants or capris look dynamic, etc. My shoes meant so much to me and I now mostly wear flip flops and flats.
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Old 05-08-2013, 03:01 PM #6
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I agree with what everyone has said. Blessings - sometimes I have the same feelings when I see people walking around campus, the mall, or when traveling. I feel like such a burden when I am being pushed around airports and like everyone is judging me negatively. One other thing that I miss is the ability to make quick and decisive decisions.
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Old 05-08-2013, 04:02 PM #7
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Dancing.

I can only dance for 5 minutes max. I'd love to take a Zumba class. I's love to teach it! All in my head.

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Old 05-08-2013, 04:58 PM #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blessings2You View Post
Sometimes I'll randomly see someone just walking along the road or on a sidewalk--not jogging, not running, just walking briskly along with no cane, and I feel the tears well up. I mentally say to that person, "Don't take it for granted."
Me, too, B2Y. All the time.
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Old 05-08-2013, 06:23 PM #9
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I miss all the things you guys do, of course, but a Quadrapledgic
summed it up pretty well for me, when he answered the question with,
"I want to be able to do all of the things, I used to hate to do"
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Old 05-08-2013, 06:53 PM #10
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working...miss having a purpose and an opportunity to do something of value outside the house
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