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Old 05-28-2007, 10:05 AM #1
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Default Help me build Empathy Man

I thought it would be fun if we all joined in creating our own super hero, Empathy Man. Let us suppose that he is of average stats all around, and say he's oooohh, about 30 (and very good looking).

Let's get him started on his journey on the morning of his first day of being our hero.

Empathy Man, I've prepared your breakfast:

A quart of strong coffee,
A sleeping pill,
A whole box of Ex-Lax

I've layed out some things for you to wear today:
a nice, double shot of Novacaine for your feet.
I've put a few hot chili peppers into these fat, stiff gloves, and you should wear them throughout the day in all you do.

Go forth, man! Live and enjoy!

Who else will help Empathy Man become all he can be???
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Old 05-28-2007, 10:23 AM #2
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He needs some pins sticking in his legs.

And lots of water to drink, every 1/2 hour he has to drink 20 oz of water so he can have that full bladder feeling.

And fog glasses to wear.
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Old 05-28-2007, 10:33 AM #3
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And a ball and chain around at least one ankle to drag around.

Oh, and a hot coal in one shoe and an ice cube in the other.
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Old 05-28-2007, 10:46 AM #4
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Brilliant work, girls! What if we tie his ankles together along with the ball & chain, oh, about 7 inches apart to help with those special moments when he loses his balance?

And FG, I'll heat those little pins to about 2500°F for full effect.
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Old 05-28-2007, 11:05 AM #5
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Let's see. He is a man.....Got any duct tape left? Good!

Let's tape down his Thingy and he can have ED!
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Old 05-28-2007, 11:11 AM #6
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I'm here to offer him a fifth of Absolute. Not for the pleasure of it, but enough to completely exhaust him, and make him walk around as if he were drunk, and enjoy the lovely remarks from people asking him if indeed he's drunk in the middle of the day (we won't tell anyone he is really drunk though).

I'm free! My in-laws are GONE!!!!!
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Old 05-28-2007, 11:12 AM #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Taffy View Post
Let's see. He is a man.....Got any duct tape left? Good!

Let's tape down his Thingy and he can have ED!
EVIL WOMAN!!! ROFLMAO!!!!
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Old 05-28-2007, 11:24 AM #8
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Quote:
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Let's see. He is a man.....Got any duct tape left? Good!

Let's tape down his Thingy and he can have ED!
Well, Sally. How about if we offer him a Cialis, but we make sure he has difficulty swallowing? Don't you know he would chew it no matter how bad it tasted.
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Old 05-28-2007, 12:45 PM #9
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Quote:
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Well, Sally. How about if we offer him a Cialis, but we make sure he has difficulty swallowing? Don't you know he would chew it no matter how bad it tasted.
Great idea, Chris!

Time for Empathy Man to have a spasm.

*applying channel locks to big toe, twisting against ankle held in vise*

You're welcome, yes, you may have another!

*adding visegrips to mid-foot and bending the wrong way*
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Old 05-28-2007, 01:57 PM #10
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Great idea, Chris!

Time for Empathy Man to have a spasm.

*applying channel locks to big toe, twisting against ankle held in vise*

You're welcome, yes, you may have another!

*adding visegrips to mid-foot and bending the wrong way*
MAD FUNNY thread!

Time for empathy man to wake up from a midday nap.

(He realises he's all numb, but has to pass water.

Go ahead and walk on those numb limbs without falling empathy man. We'll simply sit here and watch.

Was that cruel?
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