I'm getting on a plane to go to PA today to stay with my mom and dad for a while...a long while. My mom is very sick .

My brother and his wife are going to drive me insane ! A little background info here...a few years back, when I still lived in PA, my sil went a little bit insane on me about a ten year old washing machine! It is way too long to write about but I'll tell ya that my entire family (except my brother, of course) thought she had lost her mind . We've known her for close to 20 years.

After that, things were not the same. I've hardly spoken to my brother since. When I went to PA about a month or so ago, we all started talking to each other again. Ya gotta try to put things aside when someone in the family is ill, right? My sil "appeared" to be acting normally the entire time I was there (3 weeks).

My brother has never mentioned a thing to me about my MS diagnosis last year. Not a phone call or a note or anything. Par for the course from him, although as kids we were very close (he's only 2 years younger than me). While I was in PA he said to me "you need to move back to PA, don't you know heat is bad for people with MS?!?". If he had ever asked me anything about MY illness he would know that heat does not bother me. I believe he just wants me back there full time to care for my parents . My sister thinks that is his motive too.

My sil is starting to act a bit "off" again. She acted all helpful and sympathetic to the point of it seeming really phony to me. Now she doesn't answer her cell, my brother answers it or it goes to voice mail. She hasn't gone to see my mom for a while. When I talk to my brother she's in the background talking non-stop instead of just getting on the phone herself. I know that it's better that she isn't around. She was feeding the rest of us misinformation about my mom's condition when my mom was hospitalized. Any time she was alone with my mom she would always have a slew of info from my mom's doctors after the visit . It took us a while to realize this. I made many phone calls to my mom's doctors and nurses to straighten things out.

I realize that she probably has some type (maybe bi-polar) of mental illness but my brother will not even consider that this could be what's wrong with her (we discussed it back when the "washing machine" incident occurred). My sis thinks she's just a manipulative, b*&ch.

I am not looking forward to walking into this mess. My brother is picking me up at the airport tonight. I'm almost sure she won't be with him. They have a 9 year old son, so hopefully she will be home with him. I also worry about my nephew living in this situation .

Like we don't have enough problems as it is right now, ARGH!!!! *sigh*

Well, I just wanted to get that out !! Thanks for listening to me rant and rave. Wish me luck! I feel a storm brewing here, I think I might just explode on their ****'s .

This might be my last post for a while. I'll miss all of ya!!

Joelle, I hope you get a chance to check in now and again. It is rough being with family when things are not going well.

Just take care of you and your mom. That is your number 1 concern.

God bless

The good thing is that you live very far away and you can put up with a lot for a short time for the sake of your mom. I wish you strength!

morning joelle, hat goes off to you for doing what needs to be done, your mama raised you right.

as for bro not seeing it, well I lved with it for a bit b4 i saw it too, so love can still be blind. but she does sound as if there may be a screw loose, so you take good care of mama and know that my families prayers love hope and thoughts are with you and your mother, always

Ah Joelle, I see what you mean. She must be related...the best thing to do is just act as if she is not in the room. Seriously. That is how I treat my SIL...I do not acknowledge her presence. After a while she just goes away...not quietly, but she goes away.

I do not talk to her, I talk around her. I have no time for this woman. She is nuts. Literally. She's manipulative to the point of distraction for everyone in the family. That's why I blew my stack yesterday at my brother. This visit here is to set up hospice for my mom, not to garner sympathy for some disease that his wife does not have.

If she had what she says she has, she could not be doing the job she supposedly does. I know that. And if the subject comes up today at lunch, I am going to bring that up to my brother.

So Joelle..good luck to you. Take care of yourself.

Joelle

I agree with Cheryl, to just ignore her. She definitely sounds a few sandwiches short of a picnic.

I continue to send you strength and patience as you are going for the right reasons, your Mom. Please take care of your own health too.

My DH is from a very large family and the one thing I've learned is that family dynamics can be rough. One of his sisters is very hard to deal with and we had a SIL that sounds a lot like yours. We will have to compare notes!

Hang in there - hopefully she will make herself scarce!

((((Joelle)))) sorry to hear about your mom. Prayers are being said.

Nothing is worse than family squabbles. I hope things work out while you are there. Please keep us posted

I'm sorry Joelle! I have a bi-polar SIL (if that's what is making yours this way too) and she is very difficult. She caused alot of problems in the family 5years ago and I'm just now letting her back in my life. She is on the right med's now and is tolerable, almost nice The big factor is that my DB finally accepted it and got her help. It was a bad time for him. Avoid her when you can, and talk around her when she is there. Hope things don't get out of hand. Sending blessings and good vibes for the trip

If only there was a mute button for relatives.

Ignore him Joelle. If he starts with the guilt trip crap, just nod a lot. I went through a similar situation with my brother and SIL when my mom had surgery. My SIL is a corp. pharmacist so you can only imagine the things coming out of her mouth. She tried to tell us all about the surgery and how a hospital works. I finally had to tell her we've been through this before and she shut up. Since she couldn't manipulate us with her knowledge of the world, she started citing the hospital for various inconsistencies. We had a good laugh out of that and had to make up stories as to why we were laughing.

Laughter is really the best medicine, especially with crazy family. lol