[Natalie8]

I just need some reassurance that we eventually get used to this god awful diagnosis. I'm sitting here crying thinking it has been 9 months. Shouldn't things be a little easier by now?

Tonight I gave myself a copaxone shot and it hurt more than anything ever before--this was beyond the bee sting pain. I think I did it too far above my belly button and the pain shot up into my rib cage. Maybe there wasn't enough fat that high up? I could barely breath and it is still throbbing.

The shot is just a daily reminder that I have MS. Every single day. Day after day. It's like I can't escape it. Maybe if I could tolerate interferon I would only be reminded every other day, or 3x a week, or 1x a week. Wouldn't that be nice?

I'm sure the fact that I have a fever right now and feel cruddy isn't helping OR that my husband's two teenage kids came over and argued all night like teenagers will. The marriage, the move-in, and the step-parenting is so new and I only had 3 months to adjust before the diagnosis.

THANKS for listening. I think I just had to vent. But sometimes I'm just not sure I can handle this. It seems like just weeks ago I was posting the same thread. How do you all survive this???

[NurseNancy]

hi natalie,

i'm sorry you're going thru this right now.
it sounds like you're having to make a lot of adjustments all at once.
that has to be energy draining.

i've been on copaxone for 5 yrs and it does get easier.
in the beginning my shots and site reactions used to be bad.
it's all gotten much better.
i used to call shared solutions quite a bit to get advice and tips.
it sounds like your pick for this injection didn't work out.
just avoid that area from now on.

i have plenty of fat but i think it's harder to inject if you don't.
i also had to experiement with the depth setting of my autoject.
i finally had to go to about 9. if you don't go deep enuf the site reactions will be worse, in my experience.

please hang in there.
venting is a good thing and we're here to help you get thru all this.
i've been very stable on the C and my disease activity is well controlled.
so try to think of the C as attacking your disease and that you are the person in control.

[Twinkletoes]

Natalie! Whatchu doing shooting above your navel? Baaaad girl! No wonder it hurt like heck!!!

Sounds like you've got plenty to deal with on top of your MS. Are you taking an antidepressant? The problems remain, but it seems you are more able to cope with a little "help."

Have you tried an MS support group?

I was dxd just a year ago. I took the plunge right away and attended everything I could. Tamiloo and Olhipie signed on with a support group, Common Ground, that takes them skiing and other fun stuff. It is free for MSers.

I've attended NMSS sponsored dinners that had great speakers and workshops free of charge. DH and I went rafting last year (also free) and attended a baseball game with the grandkids that was very inexpensive, thanks to NMSS. (Not counting the parking ticket I got, Lol!)

I was going to go on an MS walk this spring to pay back some of what I've received, but then I broke my ankle. Now I'm bicycling, trying to get in shape to participate in one of the fundraisers.

There's got to be something where you are! I recommend you get involved so you can meet other people like yourself. It really helps to know you are not alone.

Hugs to you, Natalie! I hope things get easier for you to handle.

[SallyC]

Sheesh, Nat, it sounds like you're coping extremely well for all the changes you've had recently. I'd be bonkers.

I hope Dear New Hubby is supportive and his offspring, too. Don't be too easy on them. You need all their support to help you all cope with this #%#$#@ disease.

Keep coming here and whine all you want, 'cause we understand..

[wyldkatt]

I hesitate to say it gets easier...but you will deal with it better over time.

You will get better and you will get worse, and sometimes you will do both, more than once, in the same day, hour, even minute...it is a curious way to live but it doesn't have to cancel out joy.

Sometimes it gets overwhelming...ok, most f the time it seems overwhelming...

The first year after my dx I wondered how long the whole MS thing would consume my every thought and action...it seemed I would never get past that. All I could talk about was MS, how it affected me, what might happen to me, what research was being done, what new treatments were available, etc.

You do get used to it and adjust, then some new sx will pop up and you will have to do it again. Eventually I just started taking it as it comes, doing what I can when I can and dealing with it if I can't. I don't always deal with it well, but I deal with it. :lol:

Sorry you are having a rough time with it right now.

[tkrik]

Natalie - Thanks for venting. I am glad that you are comfortable enough to do that with us so we can support you and help you through this.

You have had a lot of changes this year. Some good, some not so good (teenagers - LOL).

I think most would agree that the 1st year is the worst. During that year you are trying to cope with not only the symptoms but the emotional garbage that goes with any diagnosis. My 1st year was spent with serial exacerbations. I'd get over 1 and then have another. My life just turned upside down.

My 2nd year was better with less exacerbations and now 3 months in to my 3rd year I am far better than I was when this all started. In the past several months I have only had 1 exacerbation and 1 questionable one. Both occurred after being sick. The time between exacerbations is getting further apart, every 6 weeks in the beginning and now down to every 4+ months. For me personally, I truly believe it was the Copaxone and am thankful for the medication. I don't get mad anymore when I take my shot. I see it as a helper in fighting this disease.

As time goes on you will get used to everything. The shots become a mindless task like brushing your hair or teeth. It becomes that routine.

Hang in there and vent all you want.

[FinLady]

This first year is rough on us, isn't it? I'm in my 10th month since dx. The emotional rollar coaster has calmed down a bit, but I still sometimes get an unexpected plunge.

Hang in there.

[AfterMyNap]

To me, it's not a matter of it getting easier, it's really just a matter of getting used to it. Since the MS is here all the time, I just assume it will be here tomorrow, so I just expect it to be this way.

Time will be your friend in coping, all of life's trials and blessings will still be there too. I don't have the energy or the desire to worry about all that either. Today, I need to concentrate on what must be done today.

I'll tell you the truth, though, gray hair is way harder to accept than MS!

[tkrik]

Originally Posted by AfterMyNap

I'll tell you the truth, though, gray hair is way harder to accept than MS!

So are fine lines and wrinkles, weight gain, more doctors visits, and of course, teenagers. LOL.

[greta]

It took me about 2 years to be ok with it and not panic all the time. Getting a counselor is a good step in learning how to deal with it.