Hi Everyone,
Well.. I am not even at the point of working yet. I am still in school for my second masters and I guess I am worried I won't be able to get through school for another year and if I'll be able to work after that. I am trying to stay positive about my future but I am terrified I won't be able to provide for my sons. I am mostly worried about my son with Autism and making sure he's ok (he's only 9). I am trying to take it one day at a time but I worry about years in the future. What do you guys do to make it through everything and plan financially for your future? My ex husband says I'm a worrier and I am but MS just makes it moreso!

Monique

Well, Monique, I worry about each day as it comes. If you plan to be disabled, you'll be robbing yourself of a lot of life's experiences. I say get your butt back in school, if that's what you aim to do. I went for my M.S. in the middle of an attack, but I was bored! I have no regrets, I quit working about 10 years ago, there was too much left for me to do. I have become quite disabled, but I still don't let it stop me.

Take a little time to get used to this, life is going to continue with or without you, jump in and do everything!

Hi Monique,

I understand your fears and concerns, but I agree that you should try to finish your degree. You may have to take a lighter course load, but do not give up. I think that you probably need to do something for yourself in order to be there for your son.

I was dx in March 2007, and I am a professor. Last summer I did not know how I was going to go back to classes in the fall and I was worried that I would have to go on disability. But I did go back and there were some days that were tough ( I did take 2 sick days), but gradually I realized that I could do this. I just have to be careful to take some down time every afternoon, and listen to my body when it is telling me to take it easy. For example, I sit most of the time while teaching, and have cut back on service (committee) work.

At first, I thought I could not make any plans because this dang disease is so unpredictable. But I have gradually come to understand that if I do not make plans then I am allowing the ms to win. At the same time, I am trying to be practical by paying off all of my credit cards and saving more money. Notice I said trying ...

Good luck!

Barb,
Thanks for the advice! I will try and get through this upcoming year. I have always been the one to juggle everything and I have my 3 boys, 2 of them special needs, a graduate assistantship, and an internship at a hospital (this past semester I was working in Hospice).

I am doing well with my money, I threw a ton of it in a safe in my room just in case and I have no credit card debt. I still don't know if I'm going to tell the lady in the hosp. about my MS or switch to another placement where I won't have to walk around all day (3 days a week). Wow.. you must be proud of going to class and fighting against the MonSter!


I am already registered with the Disability Resource Center at UGA, I guess I will write my counselor and just make contact with her, and maybe I'll feel better about the whole thing. I am going to plow through this all, sometimes I just feel like such a waste with going on two masters and then will have to (maybe) eventually apply for SSI/SSDI and not use those degrees. Ugh..

Monique

Hi Monique - I agree with Barb! Don't give up. Like she said, if you have to take a lighter load for awhile then do it. I am also a professor who is newly diagnosed (Sept. 2007). I worry about the future and whether I can keep teaching but I am soldiering on. Don't ever believe that getting your masters degrees is a waste of time! Even if you don't wind up "using them" in the future (and there is no guarantee that will happen--what happens if you never have to apply for SSDI?) they will still have value. You will have worked very hard for those degrees in spite of the odds and raising a family and that is to be commended. It also sounds like you like to learn and challenge yourself aside from just getting the degree for professional reasons. So keep going even if you have to slow down.


Good luck with everything!

Natalie

I understand what it is like to feel your future for yourself, your family, and your career could be in question. It's hard not to think about the possiblities, especially if your dx is pretty new. You have, and are, working hard to assure a good future for you kids. Your thoughts are natural. Give yourself a little time to get use to it.

Hopefully it won't be an all or nothing thing. I have had to make major cut backs, while not quitting everything entirely. I've been a teacher for 24 years. I have a masters degree and am currently a reading specialist. My dream was to teach in a university before my retirement. I probably won't get to do that, but plan on staying active and using what I have now for as long as possible. It's just about making myself slow down and not expecting as much from myself as I used to. I can still make a difference for some. I may not be able to move the mountain, but maybe can still shake it up a little bit!

As you have seen, there are a lot of smart folks here at NT. They offer good advice. Be easy on yourself...but don't give up hope!

Thank you Natalie! lol I am definitely a type A personality! The past two semesters I have been trying to get a 4.0 and I only got 8 As and 2 A-s which makes my GPA only a 3.94. I really am not worried about myself as much as hoping I can take care of my sons. I was looking at pictures from a couple years ago and it made me sad 'cause those were the days I wasn't sick Luckily, I have a great ex husband..and he's a good guy that's always looking out for me. I have always respected professors, what do you teach? I am going to just take it one day at a time, it's all I can really do. Thank you for your advice!

Monique

Gosh,
I feel like I should be a teacher/professor now I guess I get nervous because I am going to school now for social work and worry if I cannot drive how I would have a livelihood but physically I'm still ok other than having muscle spasms but they seem to be under control now. I am battling fatigue but I will see if that continues throughout the summer. I do think after awhile of getting used to my diagnosis I will feel better and will figure out ways to adapt to this. Thanks!!

Monique

I teach Political Science. One of the great things about teaching is that you can take the summers off if you choose to do so. I have a very flexible schedule (mainly teach classes in the mornings) and can do alot of work at home.

I am going to approach this from another angle . . . cause that is what I do.

I'm not sure why you would feel it is necessary to get two masters degrees . . . unless of course it is for some reason? Is it necessary for the type of work you want to do, or for the pay you hope to get . . . or what?

I too am a Type A, but there were two things my neuro told me when she mentioned MS in 1991:

1. Don't have kids
2. REDUCE STRESS

Well, I had my kids anyway , and I don't regret that decision. Otherwise though . . . I did reduce stress in a BIG way. Even though I had just spent several years getting my education and career in place . . . I dropped those "dreams", right there and then, in order to focus on taking care of my health. From that point forward, I put my kids first, my career last, and because I was very skilled, I still made excellent money doing very easy jobs.

I was able to remain gainfully employed for 14 yrs after the MS became a force to reckon with, and consider myself very lucky in that regard. Perhaps I could have continued to work beyond that, but it would have been a terrible struggle to do so, and my new neuro told me to REDUCE STRESS. That is what I did.

I have disability coverage, fortunately, so I can provide for my family (I am a single mom, with a very supportive ex too).

I really admire that you can raise 3 kids, as a sole custodial parent, especially with one (or two) who have special needs. Those things alone are huge accomplishments!!

So, I guess my recommendation would be to REDUCE STRESS. If it is not necessary to get that second degree, I would go out and make some money while I still can.

To each their own though.

Cherie