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:Poke: Need someone to help you set up Wine-o-rama? :smileypray: :Blush2: :D |
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Cheryl --
Just found this thread. I know. MS is fraught with losses. So sorry about some of yours -- the flying solo, the job stuff. My MS losses include: 1. I've just recently lost my 3rd job in the 6 years since MS hit. [a.]Apr. 2002 -- Ran out of FMLA time [b.]Dec. 2003 -- Decided to close a licensed day care home, after my parents needed to find other care for their children following an absence during an MS flare. Didn't want to start over, when I knew it would likely have to happen again. [c.]Human Resources, instead of sending FMLA forms, sent a letter telling me that I would not be returning to para-educator position in school. This was the 3rd time in my 4 years of working there that I'd had a flare that required FMLA time. 2. When I'm in a flare, another loss for me that is I become manic. The way I describe it is that I become someone that I am not. It is difficult for me, when I recover to know that I can be so much out of control of my thoughts and behavior. Most flares, for me, require hospitalization at a mental health facility. They usually occur once approx. every 10-12 months. 3. Financial losses. Had to refinance our home in 2003, due to excessive medical expenses. Has affected what jobs I am able to take, what income I am able to earn, etc. 4. Employablitity. Wondering if it is time to apply for disability. In a new job, I expect to have a flare that requires more time off than I am eligible for, prior to qualifying for FMLA again. It looks like I would likely bounce from one job to the next for the next 20 years if I would look for a new job. Have an appt with a disibility attorney next week. ~ Faith |
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I know how hard you have worked to stay employed! I was so disappointed to read that you'd recently had another flare with a long hospital stay. :hug: I wonder if you get disability and you're able to slow down if maybe those bad flares will ease up on you. I certainly hope so, and I'm so glad to hear that you're seeing an attorney for applying for SSDI. I hope you'll get approved quickly. :hug: |
Thanks, Ewiz. Going on disability and slowing down is not what I wish for. But, I don't see, right now, that another job is a good, viable option. So, thank you, for your good wishes that I get approved quickly.
I do not hope to sit at home all day, though. That would spiral me quickly into boredom, and, perhaps, a depression. I hope that I can find some meaningful volunteer work to keep me busy. ~ Faith |
I've been running like a nut here, but had to send you a hug sweetie! All I can say is that I have lost much as well, but unbeliveably, gained so much because of MS. The operative words for me have been LDN. If your looking for energy, that's what has helped me stave off the deadening fatigue of MS.
I so wish I could catch up here. Soon I promise. Hang in there and look for the positives. I'm sending you silver linings and hope you can see some! Hugs, Carolyn:hug::hug::hug::hug: |
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Oh Faith!! I'm so sorry you lost that job. I know going on disability isn't what you want, but maybe that is what you really need. Maybe God is giving you a nudge! One other thing is I know that the HR guy where you were working was doing some borderline things. Have you checked to make sure he terminated you legally? |
I just love this thread!!! It's got everything in it... the good, the bad, the ugly, the pretties, and most of all HUMOR!!!
All "losses" I have I 'choose' to see as "the best possible thing that could happen" ya know... we do have choices! :D adopted that view 30 years ago, practice it, so no matter what happens I find the lesson, find the reason why it was for my best. thanks to you all for such thoughtful responses! :grouphug: |
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But, I just want this to be over. I don't want the job back. I didn't ever want to work as a para forever; it was a job with convenient hours while my kids were still home, and one has graduated from HS, and the other will next year. I also don't want to continue to work for someone who doesn't want me there. The only other reason to contact an attorney might be to sue, and I don't wish to go that route. Besides, I know that he works with his attorney closely on HR matters, and my job is renewable on an annual basis. My guess is that he can terminate paras, just like he can probably terminate untenured teachers, without having or giving a reason. He's probably made sure that he's on firm legal ground. In related news, I went to see a disability attorney today. I found out that receiving disability takes much more time than I expected: 2 or 2-1/2 yrs instead of what I thought might take 6 months. So, I may need to look for a part time job after all. Just don't quite know what to do. I had hoped to get on disability and volunteer in something meaningful. I hope that there are meaningful part time jobs that I can get in my small city. ~ Faith |
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Get your ducks in order and apply ASAP. You just might not have to wait so long for approval. Besides, you can't be working at all if your going to have any chance at getting approved. Taking on part time hours could hurt your chances. Carolyn :hug: |
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1. Did you apply recently (in the last year or 2), or longer ago? The attorney[s office told me that it is more difficult to be approved quickly than it used to be. That, generally, only 10% of applicants get approved without an appeal, and most applicants have to appeal a second time, and wait for a court date. 2. Tell me more about being pro-active. I was planning on applying online, as that seems to be a quick way to apply. If you were approved on the first try, you likely did not use an attorney, since you did not need to appeal. Did you contact your doctors, to make sure that they turned things in quickly? 3. It is disconcerting that working at all could hurt my chances of having my application approved. I could do that if I knew it would only take six months. If it appears that there is a good chance that it can take over 2 years to be approved, I am not sure if it is a financial option to not work part time. I could keep my gross pay under the alloted $900. The only other option I can think of is to borrow against our universal life insurance policy. I don't think that, otherwise, we can make ends meet with one income. Maybe, with both kids leaving home soon, expenses will be enough less that that might be more doable than I think. But I don't believe that we spent my whole income on them. I can't work full time, because of my fatigue. It's not horrible, but, after a 6 or 6 1/2 hour day, I need a nap, and I am often drowsy during the day. I thought that working 8 hours a day, 5 days a week was a pretty significant thing. I am still bothered by the not working at all idea, because I am just not so sure how well that could work for us. Even if I don't work, I'd wish to volunteer outside the home, and, as I understand it, SSA asks you to fill out forms about your daily activities. How would that be different. I just can't sit at home all day. ~ Faith |
I applied for and was granted my SSDI on the very first try, and didnt have to wait the two years. I was very disabled and it was applied for as part of my severance package as a forced retirement from my job. It lowered what I received in retirement from them, because it was a source of income from SSDI. I did however have to wait the 2 years for the MEdicare to kick in. I was well covered till then, and not happy when Meidcare became my primary, as they dont cover kleenex.
I started receiving payments within 60 days of my application and approval. hang in there. |
Faith - I really think your lawyer was just trying to give you a worst case scenario. In my mind, your history is pretty much strong enough to get you approved quickly. How many people who apply have lost 3 straight jobs directly because of MS and also look at how much FMLA time you have used during that period of time. If anyone could get a quick approval, it should be you.
Take it one step at a time and don't get ahead of yourself. There was a reading in church a week ago and part of it was to not worry about the future, but to only deal with the troubles of the day at hand. Sounds like good advice for you right now. |
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I have an appt. with my therapist this afternoon. I haven't seen her for several years, and I don't know that I really need therapy right now, but I mostly want to pick her brain about disability. She had said once that she is often effective in helping people get approved. I think they are denying more freq now than they used to, but I'll see if she can help, and if I can try that route instead of signing the papers with the attorney, who would collect 25%. I can prob wait to hire them if I need to go to court. Still not sure about the not working thing. The para-legal that we talked to at the attorney's office said it was OK to work, but recommended that I not get too close to the $900 limit, because SSA might say, if I can work that much, why can't I work more, and why do I need disability. ~ Faith |
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Faith, So sorry to hear you're going through a job loss. I hope things work out for you with a job that gives you more fullfillment of the disability. Even though it sounds like the disability is not what you want. Good luck and God Bless! Kathy |
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http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/thread46305.html |
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