DH means it really, really well, but he thinks HE is right. When I go from the bed to my power chair, I like holding the bedpost, which is solid as a rock, plopping my butt down squarely and firmly on the seat of chair positioned for this to accure accurately, the proper distance, etc. This morning he hears my chair beep as I turn it in (darn), runs in to help me, moves my chair where I DO NOT want it, insists I hold on to him and guides my hips where it's not right, Does not hold me firmly like a rock but he feels all right about it,plops me on the seat positioned too far away), my heavy part is slightly off and starts pulling me down off seat but his reaction is to say isn't it lucky he was here to help me!!!! During the day by myself I never get these out-of-control feelings I get when he DECIDES how things should be done, I take my slippers off to try fall shoes on for fit and he knows they should be, somewhere else, takes them from spot I put the in, puts one in WC under basket, one on bed!! I find the one but not the other. I call to him, he tells me he has to get to work and has no time for me, retrieves the slipper from end of bed where he had put only the one, and his actions and words show clearly he kind of thinks I'm the idiot who can't find her slippers. He's like a 5-year old child who helps you. In a 52 y.o. man, not so cute.

I know my MS is tough on him (but still maintain, harder on me) and he needs to help, frustrated he can't "fix" me. I like help but not when most is not good for me and actions decided by another. We are both stubborn and think we are the right one (Although it really is me he thinks, me and my MS making me so difficult)
but sometimes his help is not help but another obstacle to get by.