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Old 11-25-2008, 08:26 AM #51
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Very Interesting. I never considered being a type A or B. I just assummed I was a B. Why? Middle child, very laid back, but 255! What? So I must be a commando or undercover "A- B+.
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Old 11-25-2008, 10:42 AM #52
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bombi View Post
Very Interesting. I never considered being a type A or B. I just assummed I was a B. Why? Middle child, very laid back, but 255! What? So I must be a commando or undercover "A- B+.
I think you raise a couple of good points, especially with regard to perception of a "Type A" personality ...

People often think that having the confidence to "confront" an issue indicates that a person is being "aggressive" or "Type A", but that is not true at all.

Whether one choose's to "confront" issues can determine whether they are "Passive" in nature (passive people do not), but if they are not passive, and do choose to confront, HOW they do that is what determines whether they are "Assertive" or "Aggressive".

Assertive behavior basically means that a person respectfully states their point of view, while permitting others to do the same; "Being able to protect one's rights while protecting and respecting the rights of others". A better description of "Assertive" is in the following link:

http://www.coping.org/relations/assert.htm

Aggressive behavior is when a person does not allow another person their point of view; gets "personal", defensive, or is otherwise unreceptive to points other then their own.

"Type A" tend to be more "Aggressive" vs. "Assertive" in their communication style. They do not want to consider another point of view, and will do whatever is necessary to shut it down. They are often in a hurry (impatient, slaves to deadlines ... regardless of impact), so they are not particularly interested in considering other points of view, or solutions, i.e. "my way or the highway".

It is probably not particularly healthy to be passive, as that leads to anxiety, stress, etc. However, when a person does choose to confront issues . . . in order to remain "assertive" (vs. aggressive) they should be trying to sticking to the FACTS, not getting personal, or manipulative by saying such things as "you are this way" or "your point of view is not welcome", etc.

So long as the discussion is strictly about issues or topics (not "personal"), everyone is entitled to state their point of view, respectfully. That certainly doesn't make them "aggressive" or "Type A" though.

Cherie
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Old 11-25-2008, 12:42 PM #53
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Cherie, thanks for the explanation. It helped clear it up. I can be aggressive when necessary although it takes a lot of energy and I feel like I'm giving away or using up my power.

And I can be passive. I tend to react passively when I have no power or I have no control. In this mode I'm gathering information and as we all know, you can't hear while you're talking.

Here's one. Are narcissistic people type A or are type A narcissistic?
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