Seara - I am so sorry you are going through this. It is so hard when those around us just don't understand.

Many times, I have to take a step back and put things in a different perspective. No one will really understand what it is like unless they have been there. I have found this to be true in many areas of my life and many family members and friends years later have apologized to me as they didn't realize what it was truly like to be in that situation.

I use this same perspective when dealing with family members not fully understanding what I am going through. It helps.

In the meantime, do what you can and if it doesn't get done, it doesn't get done. DDs know this 1st hand. So if it is not done, most times, they will pitch in an help out.

You also have all of us who certainly have a better understanding of what you are going through. So, spill the tears on us and we all will help you to dry up the tears and give you encouragement.

sometimes you have to be your own best friend

(((((((((((( Everyone )))))))))))))))

You have made me feel so blessed...thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I would love to answer each of your posts...and plan on doing so, but right now I have to take my grandson to the doctors....

Thanks again....really and truly!!!


seara

And that's when you ASK however you have to ask. And don't take no for an answer since YOU deserve a turn now and again.

Seara...I hear ya loud and clear...my family including my husband is the same. Last night my DD came and wanted to know what was happening Christmas. I said I wasn't able to do all the cooking and then clean up the mess afterwards.

Today I talked to her and made the statement that maybe everyone could bring two dishes...she gets all irritable stating that she thought we were steaming oysters. I don't eat them, don't care to either.lol

Some families get it, some don't...you are stronger than you think. I know its hard when family just shrugs and passes off what you're feeling. Yes, it would be nice if even for a few minutes they could understand or even pretend they do. I think pigs will fly sooner than that happening...lol

The good news is...that's why we are here. You are not alone and we understand even if your family and friends don't or can't. Sometimes I think it is more 'can't' understand, it is hard to understand some things if you haven't experienced them. We learn by experience. I hope no one else ever has to experience this.

You take care and try to hang in there, and hope your Christmas will be a good one. Don't overdo and make things worse, your health isn't worth the stress on the body.

((( Seara ))) I'm so sorry that you're going through this and I certainly understand your feelings of frustration.

It was the same for me, and still is to some extent, but I'm lucky in that I have a very understanding husband now.

The only birth famly I have left is one sister, but she has no idea about MS, infact I think she's jealous that I actually have a diagnosable condition when she always likes to be the center of attention when it comes to illness and such.

I'm pleased that you felt you could lean on us Seara......... that's what we're here for.

ali, that poem was beautiful.
you have a real talent.
you should submit that somewhere, maybe an MS magazine.

seara, my heart goes out to you.
it's so hard to deal with friends and family who don't get it.
maybe if you do less your family will appreciate more.

i pray in the new year that your family will be able to show you more support.

You have all helped me to calm down a bit and relax. Bless you!!!

I've tried various things over the years from being blunt and honest to me just not doing things I can't do and they just don't seem to get it. I don't expect them to completely understand what I'm going through.....I think an expectation like that would never be filled except by people who share in the same kind of pain/illness. But to have them for once, stop and think about someone other than themselves for a few short minutes or dang it even one afternoon would prove to me that I had at least been able to teach them 1. good manners, 2. compassion for others, 3. that the world doesn't revolve around them!

They say the best way to teach is by example....I have not been perfect in my teachings but I sure have tried to show them the previous three points I made in my dealings not only with them, but with others as well. I've worked with the disabled and thoroughly enjoyed what I did. I've volunteered as much as I can where I can. I will sit up with a friend who was dumped and crying all night. And most of all, I have been there with them through every twist and turn their life has taken them......*sigh* My love for my family carries no expectations....but my symptoms and illness require some help. Maybe I'm being too demanding.....maybe what I've tried to teach them went in one ear and out the other...who knows.

(((Ali))) thank you dear one for sharing such a beautiful poem. You are indeed talented and wise beyond your years sweetheart. You are in my prayers hon.

((((((( Everyone ))))))))) I just can't get over the support you have shown me. Now I'm crying with tears of gratitude. I will take all that you share with me to heart and I will dwell on it and do my best to take care of ME.

BTW, my door is always open to anyone needing a shoulder to lean on. I'm a good listener and I have a wicked sense of humor....I'm pretty good at making people laugh....so feel free to rap on my door anytime!

xoxoxo
seara

((((Seara))))

I'm glad I'm arriving in this thread when seara's had a chance to calm down a bit

Ali, beautiful poem!