I am actually working hard on taking my life in new directions. I had worked so hard at a couple of message board sites, and had found myself spending great chunks of my day sitting at the computer, and before you know it...its dinner time! I found during my early days of diagnosis that those message boards (this one included) were extremely valueable for my sanity, and education about this pig dog of a disease. I was doing great at learning, and be supportive, and supported when I rolled over to staff. I found it took a great deal away from what I was gaining in knowledge to take care of myself. Now, dont get me wrong, I LOVE to help others, and was thrilled to be asked, but in both spots I found that I was quickly cornered with the nit picky, behind the scenes politics, and found myself quickly handcuffed by the consistantly inconsistant, machine gun of rule changes, and ever shifting sands of the inability to make, and keep a decision. I am NOT NOT NOT going to speak badly of either place, as both held such value to me. both kept me sane, and focused, and moving forward during my panic stricken early days. I will be forever grateful. I just simply wasnt able to do everything I was doing, and found it impossible to keep up.

I have not made my way to the computer very much lately, when that is all I used to do. I used to fix/repair them for lower income, or elderly. I am an avid gamer, and was also the "elder" or leader on 3 message boards for my fav game. I teach alternative health and healing practices, and shamanistic studies, and took on students again after a long hiatus. I ended up in such a bad flair that I had to go stay in the big girl hospital. laying in a sterile (yea right) bed, being separated from my family, my animals, and my ways to relax, I knew something had to give. ALOT of somethings had to give. So, when released, I went home, and cleaned up many untied knots. untied many that shouldnt have been tied in the first place, and got up and walked away from my computer.

I have been quilting again, sewing again, walking again, listening to books on tape again, playing cards with the hubby again, and we are even planing a cruise! its been so nice to just sit back, and sip a cup of tea, and not worry about how many wolves were pecking at my door. I have not been back to even visit so many websites that I used to live at. Havent even been tempted to crack open the door to sneak a peek. I do however sneak over here once in a while and check on ya'll.

I credit so many of you with being so supportive of me, even when I wasnt being supportive of myself. Thanks for that! I get cards, letters, emails, and PMs still asking how I am. I just cant thank you enough for the kindness that you have shown me. You guys rock!

Your honest and open sharing of these very personal thoughts will be helpful to many. They already are, actually.

Do continue to update as you feel able.

hugssssss and good for you!! taking care of YOU and enjoying what life is outside this box..is great!! and if you had too many pulling at you from all over...glad you untied the knots as you put it...and thanks for checking in here!! hugsss,sarah

What game(s) were you/are you into Dej?

I've been playing Neverwinter Nights 2 with my beau recently

I have played Final Fantasy XI for the last 7 years. I LOVE this game! I play with folks from Japan, Germany, Ireland, England, Scotland, and the US. Its a great game, but you have to pay a montly fee to play it.

A long time ago, when I had breast cancer, and was very sick, my neice plugged in her video game (a PS1) and taught me how to play a role playing game. Next time I visited her we played nintendo. I was hooked! next time i went to the hospital I had my hubby hook my game up to the hospital TV instead of watching a soap opera. It became my world.

I have played neverwinter nights, and its a good game! nice choice.

I do play other games. I recently got the Wii Animal Crossing. I play with others from around the US, and a few from the UK. its a childs game, but mindless fun, and full of laughs, and good times. Another I love is Harvest Moon. Another baby game, but mindless fun. Simple to relax to, and not feel pressured to save the world. If anyone else plays animal crossing, I would love to exchange friends codes and visit your town.

It snowed. AGAIN! this is silly. Snow every 3 days is just silly. I love the snow, but even I am getting quite weary of this.

Sounds like me and Dark Age of Camelot Dej. I've been playing that since the summer of 2002