[Blondi]

My husband's boss was dx'd with PPMS about 5 years ago. Within a year he was in a wheelchair and by the time I was dx'd 3 years ago, he was no longer able to work, was almost completely paralyzed and mostly confined to his home.

He was a big biker dude, but from what I understand, a real teddy bear. His neuro told him that unfortunately, MS would take him before anything else... and he was correct.

My husband spoke with him on Tuesday while he was helping him get some cable and internet issues resolved. In hindsight, he says that he seemed really up beat and clear headed (which is amazing considering the amount and type of pain meds he was on - I believe he had recently started on morphine). He tried calling him again on Wednesday for an update but couldn't get a hold of him. On Thursday his wife called to say that he had had a stroke and it wasn't looking good. He only woke up for 15 minutes and couldn't recognize anyone.

Yesterday my husband recieved a call from his company to let him know that his previous boss, his friend had passed away. He called his wife and she told him that he had passed peacefully in his sleep Saturday night.

I had never met him, but through this disease, we had become friends of sorts. I have been crying for a man I never met. My husband was friends with him for over 10 years, but in some ways, I believe I knew him a little bit better, or differently at least. We had an understanding of this horrible disease that no one can know unless they live with it.

I'm not really sure why I feel the need to post about this, except that I'm feeling overwhelmed with emotions and I'm not sure what to do about them.

I do know that I will never feel sorry for myself again when I have to give myself my Rebif shot. I will thank God that I have this medication and that for the time being, it is keeping me at RRMS.

He told my husband a while back that he was ready to go. Maybe he was just waiting for those who loved him to be ready as well.

Rest in peace, Don...

[Niko]

Kim,

I'm sorry for the man's passing. My thoughts are with his family as well as yours.

Niko

[lady_express_44]

I'm sorry for your loss, Kim.

This has to hit home, given we have the same affliction, and I understand this will stir up lots of emotion. I lost a friend to PPMS in late 2007, and it broke my heart too.

RIP, Don. No more pain.

Hugs to you, your husband, and Don's family.

Cherie

[Blondi]

Thank you.

The weird thing is that I can't seem to stop crying about it, about him. And the even weirder thing is that I have been crying over caramel corn.

We visited him on Christmas Eve and took him a tin of my homemade caramel corn. I didn't go in because at the time I had bronchitis and didn't want to get him sick. I wish now I had, I feel a little cheated that I never met him. About mid January we recieved his annual Christmas letter. He mentioned our Christmas Eve visit and how much he loved the caramel corn. I immediately went out and bought the ingredients to make more for him. I never got around to it.

I wish I had made the time.

[NurseNancy]

oh kim,

i'm sorry for the loss of your husband's friend, and yours.
you may also be grieving a bit for yourself out of fear that you will be sicker too. ? but, remember that he had a different form of MS.

your friend sounds like he made peace with his illness and was ready to go with God.

God bless.

[DM]

Hey Kim~ So sorry to hear about your DH's boss and friend. It's never easy when things like this happen. We have lost 2 dear friends in the past week. I think your posting about your feelings here, helps you to work through your emotions. Isn't that a great thing about NT??

Just remember that you DID take him some caramel corn that he enjoyed and remembered; it's not what we don't do for people that is appreciated; it's what we DO for them. I also don't think you have to personally meet someone to call them ''friend'', you were friends.

Take care of yourself, Kim and please tell your DH how sorry I am for his loss, also.

[soxmom]

Kim...Im so sorry about your friend......

[weegot5kiz]

Kim you have both Debbies and my prayers and thoughts for the loss you and hubby have suffered

[Kitty]

I'm so sorry, Kim.

[Blondi]

Judy, I think you hit the nail on the head. I do have a fear that this will be my future as well. How selfish to be thinking like that when it's not about me...

Thanks for all your replies, it really does help.