Im very bad at introductions and social...things, so assume I have those usual good sentiments because I do but cant figure out how to put them to words without making myself feel akward.

Anyway. Im 25 and male. Rather than go into the insane amount of detail I normal use online, here are 'just the facts': All physical sensation causes pain, without exception. Its unbearable, and for some reason the smaller the cause of the irritation, the sharper the pain feels. Even touching myself causes pain (both in the touched place and the touching hand.)

One day, for no clear reason, I realised that I'd been having this pain constantly for my entire life. That it wasnt going to go away. Not now or ever. And that I would likely never be able to be touched comfortingly or intimately by anyone without serious pain. Basically, that thing that is so vital to keep humans healthy, kind touches andthe like, will be forever absent from my life.

This has proved to be true in 100% of situations. And since then ive..well done nothing. If i dont keep distracted constantly, i think about this. And I dont like crying that much. I can in no way afford the neurological and mental health care I need to deal with this.

So..Yeah, Here I am, with a never ending anxiety about the future. I mean, I cant get a job or anything -- the depersonalization can freak me out, as can the stress-induced Mitral Valve prolapse expressions.

Oh and I have some sort of autism spectrum disorder thing if that matters. I cant recall what it is specificly.

Okay, thanks for reading my thing! I am terrible at ending posts like this, as they make me infinitely akward. So this will be it.