[MyOldMan]

Husband is 68, and quietly going into a funk of old age.

He is quite content to be by himself, with minimized interaction with others.

This gentleman has experienced a drop in libido, which I believe is age and depression related. Many years of borderline untreated High Blood Pressure may have also played a role in the ED and Libido, according to the Cardiologist which I insisted he be monitored by. I am in agreement with that theory.

Key point being is this person is monitored for health, even though his heart and blood pressure are fine.

We have an older relative (his brother) who has alzheimers, residing with us. That constant presence is proving to be demanding interaction for this man.

I am in charge of supplements, and diet for the most part. We have both taken adaptogens, and I have found they benefit me nicely. My husband claimed he did not feel anything while taking them, so I dropped them off of his regime.

The past three years has been hell since his libido vanished. He is easily irritated by interaction, and debates the most minor topics at the drop of a hat. It appears that is the wall he uses to distance people from him.

Well I decided to give Rhodiola a chance once again. Low and behold the disagreeable behavior quieted. I stopped after 6 days, and it returned. I didn't even tell him that I stopped the dose.

I merely pointed out something minor, and the old disagreeable nature returned, with him not even being able to respond. Instead he walked clear out of the room and has been sitting in silence watching golf since that incident.

Tomorrow I shall return to the rhodiola dose (a mere 100 mg) and am looking forward to seeing the other pleasant man return.

I know men go through hormonal changes. At one point I suggested that he was depressed, even though he insisted he was happy with himself and life.
I cannot help but wonder how far this aging mental decline will go. He is 68 and I have supported him to the point he is outwardly fit, and blood pressure is amazingly decreased and steady. The cardiologist attempted to converse with him regarding libido and emotions. This very nice Dr was dumbstruck by my husband lack of concern and response.

I am just thankful that I know about nutrition, supplements/adaptogens and preventive medicine. It may be the one thing that saves him from himself and me from his aging chapter.

We are both very youthful in appearance for our age, though I am a good ten years younger than he, he really doesn't older.

Have others experienced this aging of a spouse with a sort of irritable man syndrome?

I doubt there are answers here... I have consulted many medical professionals, all were equally floored by husbands what care I attitude about these changes.

Thank heavens for rhodiola... Though I will have to cycle it, as that is the proper way to take it. I am not looking forward to the weeks off on that cycle.

In the meantime I am joining a woman's workout cycling team, and staying fit as can be... I must take care of myself, so I can potentially be a decent care giver? Yes, I am prepared for the worst.

[Darlene]

MyOldMan,

It is great to have you come and be with us. You will fine a great number of dear friends to listen when you are in need of ears. Please, just let us know how we can help you out. You will find out we are supportive and relaxing place.

Please keep us up to date on your situation. Again welcome, looking forward to seeing you around. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[Leesa]

Since you mention depression, have you talked to your doctor about putting him on an antidepressant? This could be the answer to his problem. Many seniors DO become depressed as they get older, as they begin to think about their own mortality.

I've had to be on an antidepressant most of my life cause I have clinical depression, but I remember that my Dad started to become depressed as he got older. He withdrew, he wasn't quite 'himself' and even tho he always was a bit cranky, he became even more so. I could always get around his crankiness cause I knew how to handle him -- my sisters were scared of him, but I just bowled right over him, and he never knew how to handle me. LOL He actually enjoyed it. But an antidepressant helped him and it might help your husband too.

Talk to your doctor about it. Perhaps it would help -- it's really worth a try, don't you think? I really feel for him, because after dealing with depression ALL my life, I know how miserable he must be.

I wish you and your husband all the best. Please take care and God bless you both. Hugs, Lee

[mrsD]

Welcome to NeuroTalk:

Well I put "my old man" on PharmaGaba last week. 1/2 dose of 100mg at bedtime. What a difference! He was getting so grumpy I couldn't stand it. We have to get ready for our summer upNorth, on an Island, and he was just too overwhelmed this year to help do the tasks etc. It is remarkable how much more friendly and like his old self he has become!

You can buy it at Amazon:
http://www.amazon.com/Nutrigold-Phar...rds=pharmaGaba
This particular brand works better than the older Gabas that have been on the market for a while.

This is a mild stress reliever... works on the GABA neurotransmitter system and relieves stress. I've used it for a year or so...with a break and one return to higher dose. I use 200mg at bedtime, as I have many pain issues, and it works well for me too. I tend to have anxiety attacks now and then and this prevents them for me.

No side effects, no addiction worries with this.

[MelodyL]

Hi there. You remind me of me but I'm 65 and so is my hubby. I read your post, decided to be NICE to my husband, approached him as he was watching a video on the computer, I said "How are you doing?" and he said "what do you want, can't you see I'm busy". I burst out laughing and so did he. He has neuropathy, he's getting older, he has the worst case of psoriasis I have ever seen and other issues. But we get along and honestly, intimacy is the LAST thing on my mind at my age. I had to chuckle when I read what you wrote. Maybe if I was 55 but not at my age. God Bless people who still have those interests. I'm lucky I can move in the morning with my arthritis.

But thankfully we hug each other every day and get along.

So just wanted to stop by and say Welcome. And I just might look at those supplements you were talking about. I might decide to get Frisky someday. Hey, you never know.

Melody