[amyburemt]

In October my family and I were hit head on by a drunk driver. I am a mother to 2 and a stepmother to 2 so we have 4 kids total ages 10, 11, 12, 13. The kids had various injuries but are now back at school and doing quite well. My husband had leg injuries and it will be a few months before he is back to his normal routine. I had a TBI and have gone to neuropsyche for their batter of tests and have issues with multitasking and memory. Being cooped up in the house is extremely stressful but when I go out I get tired easily so it's like a double whammy. My sister in law has come from another state to help take care of everyone. I have also been dealing with an inept neurorehab center and don't have an appointment until March even though we have been fighting to get one since the accident in October happened. I have been told by various physicians to ease back into doing normal things and when I try , I seem to step on other peoples toes in the household. I am finding that I am increasingly angry and frustrated. I'm angry because I am stuck in the house being told to increase what I do yet my husband keeps giving my sister in law all the tasks. I feel like I have no one to talk to and just keep getting told that I am having episodes of frustration. I can list out what frustrates me ranging from the facts that I get tired easily, I am stuck in this house, I can't drive, anxiety over taking everything back over when my sister in law leaves because now the stepkids think she's the most wonderful person on earth and fall all over themselves to do chores for her when I used to get the "cold stares" from them when I asked them to do their chores with a few "you're not my mom!s " thrown in. My anxiety is huge when it comes to even the thought of her leaving. But yet she gets frustrated when i get irritated after I have dealt with 35 different people on the phone trying to get a neuro rehab appointment and then finding out they didn't schedule it until March. Drama she calls it. My husband just sits there and I can't really remember the last significant conversation we have held.
Anyway, I would like some outside advice on how to deal with the every day frustrations. If I feel like i'm starting to get frustrated over something I am doing or something that is not going the way I think it should, What should I do? should I extricate myself from it immediately until I can think about it rationally and what kind of phrase can I use to clue my family in on the fact that I need some time to think about things?
thanks
Amy

[Darlene]

Amy,

It is great to have you come and be with us. You will fine a great number of dear friends to listen when you are in need of ears. Please, just let us know how we can help you out. You will find out we are supportive and relaxing place.

Here is a forum you need to check into, there are some fellow friends in there to help you.

Traumatic Brain Injury:
http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/forum92.html

Please keep us up to date on your situation. Again welcome, looking forward to seeing you around. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Darlene

[clstewart81]

Im so sorry to hear about the accident! Also about you being stuck indoors. I feel the same when the kids are gone to school, I am glad to get alone time but then I feel too alone. No gray area! Big hugs

[adougall70]

Hi Amy,
I too was in a car accident back in July. We were side-swiped by a car running a red light. My children (10 and 14) are now doing fine but I suffered a concussion. My symptoms did not surface until a few days later. One of the many symptoms (headaches, migraines, blurred vision, sensitivity to light and sound, depression, anxiety, ringing in my ears, dizziness, taste off, trouble concentrating, slurred, delayed speech, trouble talking to more than one person at a time, neck, shoulder and hip injury) was irritability!! I felt like no one understood what I was going through. I went to my family doctor who referred me to a Concussion Clinic where I see a doctor for physical symptoms (he prescribed me meds for headaches), a psychologist for depression, anxiety, PTSD (I take zoloft), an Occupational therapist for my neck, hip and shoulder, and Occupational therapy for memory loss. I have also been referred to a neurologist and a neuro-optometrist for my vision(I need glasses.) It has been a great deal of help to be in the care of specialists who communicate with one another.
I also recommend you take numerous "ME TIME" breaks throughout your day where you go in a dark room and just rest. You don't have to take a nap, just rest for 20 minutes. I have found this helps me to regenerate my body and mind.
I understand your frustration but it sounds as if you need to find a physician to help you sooner than March. My thoughts are with you.
Ann

Originally Posted by amyburemt

In October my family and I were hit head on by a drunk driver. I am a mother to 2 and a stepmother to 2 so we have 4 kids total ages 10, 11, 12, 13. The kids had various injuries but are now back at school and doing quite well. My husband had leg injuries and it will be a few months before he is back to his normal routine. I had a TBI and have gone to neuropsyche for their batter of tests and have issues with multitasking and memory. Being cooped up in the house is extremely stressful but when I go out I get tired easily so it's like a double whammy. My sister in law has come from another state to help take care of everyone. I have also been dealing with an inept neurorehab center and don't have an appointment until March even though we have been fighting to get one since the accident in October happened. I have been told by various physicians to ease back into doing normal things and when I try , I seem to step on other peoples toes in the household. I am finding that I am increasingly angry and frustrated. I'm angry because I am stuck in the house being told to increase what I do yet my husband keeps giving my sister in law all the tasks. I feel like I have no one to talk to and just keep getting told that I am having episodes of frustration. I can list out what frustrates me ranging from the facts that I get tired easily, I am stuck in this house, I can't drive, anxiety over taking everything back over when my sister in law leaves because now the stepkids think she's the most wonderful person on earth and fall all over themselves to do chores for her when I used to get the "cold stares" from them when I asked them to do their chores with a few "you're not my mom!s " thrown in. My anxiety is huge when it comes to even the thought of her leaving. But yet she gets frustrated when i get irritated after I have dealt with 35 different people on the phone trying to get a neuro rehab appointment and then finding out they didn't schedule it until March. Drama she calls it. My husband just sits there and I can't really remember the last significant conversation we have held.
Anyway, I would like some outside advice on how to deal with the every day frustrations. If I feel like i'm starting to get frustrated over something I am doing or something that is not going the way I think it should, What should I do? should I extricate myself from it immediately until I can think about it rationally and what kind of phrase can I use to clue my family in on the fact that I need some time to think about things?
thanks
Amy

[tamiloo]

Just wanted to add my welcome to Neurotalk!! You have been through some hard things. We have some very great folks that hang out here on NT. Hope all will be well this holiday season.