[steash]

i wish i knew what to say on these things.
i have looked in on a couple but have never actually left any messages.
i'll try with my story so far.
i lost my dad in january to an aortic aneurysm,seems like yesterday. lived in a daze ever since.
we had/have our own family run company. i have to be back at work as without me our whole extended family dont have jobs, cant pay the mortgages etc...
try as i might i still feel i am just turning up waiting to go home and hide....
its fathers day over here in an hours time and i would love just disappear but then i have my own kids and that would not be fair on them.
i'm sorry i am drunk, not quite stupid drunk but i am working my way there.
i know it doesnt make things better and all the other rubbish but then at this split second in time its all i want to do.....

[Alffe]

I'm so sorry you are having to go through this steach. Grief just seems to take forever to get through but you have come to the right place for support.

Welcome and warm hugs.

[steash]

have now reached the highs of stupid drunk. happy fathers day!
nice to see word assosiation games get more hits than someone just looking for a friendly voice

[steash]

is it possible to retract the last stupid comment? i'm sorry just so very much not myself at the moment.
sorry once again
tc all

[Abbie]

Welcome Steash!
I am sorry you are going through this rough time. I have a limited understanding of what you are going through... I have had a couple of losses this year... My Grandmother in January to heart disease and my Uncle to suicide just a few short weeks ago.

It is pretty quiet on most weekends around here but please know you will find some of the nicest and caring people on the boards here.

Please come back and look around... join in the conversations when you are comfortable. The Social Chat board has a lot of silliness and good times... people are in and out of there often.

Take care,
Gentle hugs,
Abbie

[AfterMyNap]

Originally Posted by steash

is it possible to retract the last stupid comment? i'm sorry just so very much not myself at the moment.
sorry once again
tc all

No offense taken, Steash, but you might do well to take two and call us in the morning. It seems like the buzz might be speaking for you tonight and I'd hate to have you feel like you're not welcome here because folks aren't responding quickly. Things don't always move real fast here.

I'm sorry you are feeling so down tonight and I hope that a new day will bring you more peace and comfort.

[Alffe]

Happy Fathers Day Steash...I hope you are sleeping.

[Dmom3005]

Happy Father's day Steash. I wish I had words that could comfort you,
but there really aren't any. But that with time, it will get better.

But that it will take time. I lost my dad many years ago, and tonight I've
been thinking about him a lot. Because my son just turned 16 last night,
and it was 3 weeks after he was born that my dad was gone.

But the reason, I think its so fresh right now, is because my dad held on so that he could welcome his youngest grandson, into the world. See no one but my dad knew it was going to be a boy. He seems to have had a conversation with god before he died and god told him.

He didn't tell anyone but my youngest sister, who told me just a few years ago. And I now take comfort just thinking that when my son has a seizure my dad is the one that holds his head when he falls and helps to make sure he is safe when I'm not there.

ITs how I get through the time.

So please spend this day with your kids, and remember your dad is there too,
taking care of you all. He is watching over you all.

Donna

[Darlene]

steash,

Hello and welcome to NeuroTalk.

It has been a long time since I lost my father, but at times it seems to be just the other day. For me it got better as years have gone by. At first all holidays were pretty hard, but I always feel him next to me. Hang in there, it will get better.

Have a nice Father's Day with your kids, as your father had with you. Just wrap your arms around them.

Hope to see you around.

Darlene

[Doody]

Hi (((Steash))) and welcome.

I kind of shuddered at the thought of you getting really drunk! Only because I can't drink much and I pretty much bypass the happily drunk stage and go straight to sick and hung over! I hope this morning you are feeling okay.

Embrace your kids and be thankful for them. Losing someone is so hard and leaves a big hole in your heart and soul. Those first holidays and 'markers' of rememberance are so difficult in the beginning. As time passes, they get better.

Time heals all wounds, yes that sounds contrite, but it's also true. Have you thought about talking with a grief counselor or a therapist? My therapist saved me, literally.

I don't think I've ever been to more than one of the games in here. I usually hang out in the suicide forum. Maybe there are people in the Depression Forum who you could lean on as well. You can lean on any of us in any of the forums!

We're not doctors here and try to support each other the best that we can. It's a wonderful group of people, that you will see, I promise.

I hope you find your way back here soon.

Hugs and much love,
Nancy