advertisement
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 09-25-2006, 10:43 AM #1
GinaMarie's Avatar
GinaMarie GinaMarie is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: CA
Posts: 101
15 yr Member
GinaMarie GinaMarie is offline
Member
GinaMarie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: CA
Posts: 101
15 yr Member
Wink 7 Reasons not to mess with children

7 reasons not to mess with children.


A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.

The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.

The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".

The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"

The little girl replied, "Then you ask him ".



A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.

As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.

The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."

The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."

Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."



A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.

After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"

Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."



One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.

She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"

Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."

The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"


The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.

"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'

A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."



A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."

"Yes," the class said.

"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"

A little fellow shouted,
"Cause your feet ain't empty."



The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:

"Take only ONE. God is watching."

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.

A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.


It doesn't matter how many people you send this to, just remember if it made you laugh, your friends will laugh too!
__________________
GinaMarie - Basal Cell Carcinoma Nevus Syndrome (BCCNS) also known as Gorlin Syndrome, Multiple other stuff, Mother to 4 miracle boys.
Nathan - Adhd,
Caleb - Adhd,
Adam - BCCNS, Adhd, Chiari Malformation,PDD-NOS
Noah- BCCNS, Adhd, Chiari Malformation, Bronchial Stenosis, Asthma
Thank you Jesus!! He walks with us thru all of this because he will never leave us nor forsake us!! He is my BESTEST friend!!!
.

.
GinaMarie is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
"Thanks for this!" says:
MooseasaurusRex (10-07-2008)

advertisement
Old 10-18-2007, 12:33 AM #2
michael178 michael178 is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: south dakota
Posts: 225
15 yr Member
michael178 michael178 is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: south dakota
Posts: 225
15 yr Member
Default

my father, as a child coveted the piece of left over apple pie in the refrigerator, so he wrote a note and attached it to the pie. The note said "I spit on this" when he returned later he found a second note saying "so did I." He was the oldest of six boys, but apparently not the smartest. He became a neurologist, at the Mayo Clinic.
michael178 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Old 02-18-2008, 05:02 AM #3
countrymom countrymom is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 28
15 yr Member
countrymom countrymom is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 28
15 yr Member
Default

GinaMarie, thank you for this, i laughed all the way through it. It sure sounds like your hands are full but you have not lost your sense of humor. You are right He never leaves us or forsakes us! Blessing marilyn
countrymom is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 04:44 AM.

Powered by vBulletin • Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.

vBulletin Optimisation provided by vB Optimise v2.7.1 (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2024 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.
 

NeuroTalk Forums

Helping support those with neurological and related conditions.

 

The material on this site is for informational purposes only,
and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment
provided by a qualified health care provider.


Always consult your doctor before trying anything you read here.