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Old 12-17-2009, 02:24 PM #1
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Hello I was so excited when I found this site. I was looking in hopes of finding some support and well just someone to talk to that understands. I will start out by telling you that my 10yr old daughter is bipolar1, OCD, ODD, sensory sensative and has frontal lobe seizures. My daughter is just getting to be to much for me to handle. She has been seeing psyc docs since around 3yrs old (early onset bipolar) from the time she was born she would beat her head and face on the floor or whatever was closest, try to bite you if you kissed her, her body would stiffen if you tried to hold her close, be playing one minute and the next in a rage. She has smeared poop on walls and floors, killed animals, says her imaginary friends want her to kill people while they sleep, stabbed me, bit, thrown things, trashed the house and hospital ers, eascaped from and beat up officers, takes six trained in restraint to hold her down. So much more, to much to tell. Anyways she goes to a special needs school with 2 teachers 5 students per class and a mental health worker in school. I have to go pick her up constantly because she is being restrained. I cant restrain her anymore she is 10 and 145lbs. I cant punnish her in any way because as soon as I turn my back she attacks me with whatever is closest which in the past has been pencils, hammer, teeth, chairs, vases and on and on. No one can stand to be around her. I cant take her anywhere. Im just so lost. Ive had every specialist in my home and taken her to every specialist. She is on ALOT of medicine and has been hospitalized several times. They said she is at the point where I need to institutionalize her before she kills me(which she has said she is going to do in my sleep) or herself. I have woke up before with the feeling of someone in my room when my eyes focussed, there she was just standing in the corner of my room staring at me and she asked "Are you dead yet?" I know this is long and I could probly go on for a couple hours. My thing is that in order to institutionalize her I would have to sign her over to the state and I cant do that. My eighteen yr old moved out because she is scared of her.
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Old 12-17-2009, 03:28 PM #2
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Hi,
You have a real situation here. First, you need to tell the school to stop
calling for you to pick her up. If they can't handle her then they need
to look at a different placement.

There would be a way to do a residential placement. This would fix it so you still have custody of her. But the school places her in a residential placement. This would be revisited every year.

If you can tell me which state you are in I might be able to help find you a advocate that can help you get this kind of placement.

I'm a parent advocate in Indiana and this is part of what I help do in cases
like this.
But for one thing. As long as you let the school send her home, then they will not take responsibility for her schooling.

Donna
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Old 12-17-2009, 04:09 PM #3
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Its so frustrating when they call because I can hear her growling and screaming in the background. Most of the time its to say come get her because we cant put her on a bus like this. I live in Tennessee. Ive had prefered options and others in home. The only others Ive heard of are like court advocates and she would have to be in their custody (states). Any help would be much appreciated.
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Old 12-17-2009, 04:13 PM #4
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Oops I sent that reply to you dmom (?) instead of posting it. Sorry still trying to figure this out.
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Old 12-17-2009, 04:15 PM #5
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OK Maybe this will work. lol I keep trying to post a reply but I think they are all going to Dmom.
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Old 12-17-2009, 06:25 PM #6
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Hi and welcome to NT!

You’re in a heartbreaking situation, but I know you will find information and support here.

If you haven’t already found it, our link to Parents of Bipolar Children is:

http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/forum80.html

The link to our general bipolar forum is:
http://neurotalk.psychcentral.com/forum38.html

Cheers
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Old 12-17-2009, 07:26 PM #7
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Here is the information for NAMI Nashville (National Association of Mental Illness) they should be able to help you find help for your daughter...

NAMI Nashville, Inc.
1101 6th Ave. North
Room 107
Nashville, TN 37208
Fax: (615)259-7594
Phone: (615)259-7591

I hope this helps...


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Old 12-17-2009, 09:55 PM #8
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You did just fine. I need to locate my list of Parent advocacy groups.

But also the NAMI group should be able to help you.

Donna
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Old 12-18-2009, 07:48 AM #9
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Default some scattered thoughts. i hope this is a somewhat helpful

Quote:
Originally Posted by one-more-day View Post
My thing is that in order to institutionalize her I would have to sign her over to the state and I cant do that. My eighteen yr old moved out because she is scared of her.
Hello,

Signing a child over to the state does become an issue for families with children who are suffering from mental illness that cannot be accommodated in the home. It also becomes a financial issue for families.

Do you have an independent advocate or lawyer outside of the system?
Check with
www.nami.org
www.bpkids.org

Also, Donna (Dmom3005) can give you some resources on this thread.

Normally I might tell you that it is important not to sacrifice one child for another. The eighteen year old should be cherished and protected.
But the eighteen year old is now a legal adult and has already moved out of the house. Still, that 18 year old will need to go through lots of healing after the turmoil in the family.
Are you getting supportive therapy for yourself?

I don't have children so I don't know how I would handle signing over the child to the state. If the state can keep her safe and keep everyone around her safe, that is one important consideration.
Some states do better job of this than other states do.

By the way, it is possible that some of these are garbage diagnoses:
Quote:
my 10yr old daughter is bipolar1, OCD, ODD, sensory sensative and has frontal lobe seizures.
The OCD, ODD, and sensory issues might be part of the bipolar -- not separate. It's possible that the care workers are focusing on the wrong things.
I would think that the seizures and the bipolar would be front and center for treatment. The others might be reduced once the seizures and bipolar are properly treated. ~~ These are just some thought if you have not thought about that already.

Where do you live? Have you taken her to a top pediatric psychiatrist (usually but not always based at a medical school). I personally know one genius psychiatrist in Belle Mead, New Jersey.

In this story, the daughter was eventually placed in a setting that the family was happy about:
http://www.healthyplace.com/parentin...er/menu-id-61/


This is difficult.
I wish you and your family well.

M.
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Old 12-18-2009, 11:57 AM #10
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She goes to Vanderbilt Psyc (which is a learning hospital). I agree with the garbage diagnosis, I believe it all to be symptoms of the bipolar. She is now hospitalized. She broke my nose last night. She trashed my house threw everything at me I have cuts and bruises from head to toe. When the cops showed up she threw the knife (I have no clue where she got it they are all locked up)she was holding at me and ran out the back door. They had to take me to the hospital with my child out on the streets (broke my heart) they just told me I had to get to the hospital by ambulance and they would find her. They found her two hours later. I was at the hospital for 12 hrs. When they found her they brought her there also awauting youth villages. I hate to say it but for the first time out of other hospitalizations, I am not crying and a wreck I actually feel a sense of relief.
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