What to do with a 22 year old who won't accept the diagnosis?

Leslie Werner · 03-07-2012, 12:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EllenT

Hi I am new to this forum, and am scared and frustrated. My 22 year old daughter was recently diagnosed as bipolar but she refuses to accept the label, and will not take any medications or see any therapists. She was hospitalized for 2 weeks back in October and the experience was beyond frightening - I am worried that it has left her with so many negative impressions that she may never trust a doctor again. She was drugged into a state of utter fog, and was given no particular attention in the hospital. She was released without clear instructions other than to see her psychiatrist for more medication. She lives on her own not near me, and while I have spent time with her, I can only do so for short periods of time because she gets angry and feels that she has no privacy. She seems fine on some days, then on others starts ranting and expressing serious paranoia about things that make no sense. If I try to tell her that she's not making any sense, she says that I just don't understand what is going on in her head. I wish she would get back to treatment but do not know how to make that happen.

If anyone out there has been through something similar - please let me know what might work. Am seeing a therapist myself, which is helping, but I still have no concrete advice on what to do next. Waiting for the next bad thing to happen is just scary, and the loss of control and influence over the kid's behavior is terrifying too.

thanks

And so understand where you are at. My son still will not take medication and he has been hospitalized on 4 occasions. Twice it was for suicide attempts. My best advice to you is to show love and acceptance. It is the only thing that has worked at all. We can't force them to take meds-they are adults. It is a disease that that has the potential for ruining families and relationships. My advice is to just show love and support.

pninn · 03-08-2012, 11:32 AM

Your daughter's terrifying experience is all too typical. You should definitely educate yourself. For example it has been found that many of psychiatry's label of "mental disorders" really stem from physical problems.Psychiatrists routinely do not inform patients of non-drug treatments, nor do they conduct thorough medical examinations to ensure that a person’s problem does not stem from an untreated medical condition that is manifesting as a “psychiatric” symptom. Here is a good starting point:
http://www.cchr.org/alternatives/rig...-informed.html

SashaSam · 08-19-2012, 08:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EllenT

Hi I am new to this forum, and am scared and frustrated. My 22 year old daughter was recently diagnosed as bipolar but she refuses to accept the label, and will not take any medications or see any therapists. She was hospitalized for 2 weeks back in October and the experience was beyond frightening - I am worried that it has left her with so many negative impressions that she may never trust a doctor again. She was drugged into a state of utter fog, and was given no particular attention in the hospital. She was released without clear instructions other than to see her psychiatrist for more medication. She lives on her own not near me, and while I have spent time with her, I can only do so for short periods of time because she gets angry and feels that she has no privacy. She seems fine on some days, then on others starts ranting and expressing serious paranoia about things that make no sense. If I try to tell her that she's not making any sense, she says that I just don't understand what is going on in her head. I wish she would get back to treatment but do not know how to make that happen.

If anyone out there has been through something similar - please let me know what might work. Am seeing a therapist myself, which is helping, but I still have no concrete advice on what to do next. Waiting for the next bad thing to happen is just scary, and the loss of control and influence over the kid's behavior is terrifying too.

thanks

Oh Ellen i feel your pain as my sister is going through this with her 21 yr old daughter. To make matters worse doctors wont really talk to my sister because my niece is an "adult" (real nice, but when she is in trouble who the hell has to bail her out?? The system is screwed up) i have no answers however will pray for you and your daughter, this is a horrible disease

Mari · 08-20-2012, 01:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SashaSam

Oh Ellen i feel your pain as my sister is going through this with her 21 yr old daughter. To make matters worse doctors wont really talk to my sister because my niece is an "adult" (real nice, but when she is in trouble who the hell has to bail her out?? The system is screwed up) i have no answers however will pray for you and your daughter, this is a horrible disease

Hi,
The niece might agree to sign a HIPAA form that allows the doctors to discuss her case with her mother.

Nami.org has chapters all across the US that help family members.

M

ginnie · 08-20-2012, 09:07 AM

I feel the pain of your situation also. I have a daughter in trouble, and I am helpless to do anything. Noone wants their grown child in a situation where they won't keep the help or seek it on their own. She has already experienced on the bottom to have to go to the hospital. She has to recognize her own trouble and want to do something about it. There is a forum on this site about bipolar, and alot of helpful information right here. I know a number of people who have this disorder, yet do fantastic in life with the proper help. Is there a way to direct this person to this site? Just lurking, and getting to feel comfortable with speaking on the forum may help her. There really is help if she would just reach out for it. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Welcome to Neruo Talk, there are alot of good folks I hope will respond to you. ginnie

prowlenn · 10-21-2012, 01:35 PM

I am new here but I may be able to help...I was diagnosed bipolar at the age of 17 and I didn't want to accept the diagnosis either. I don't want to be negative in any way but me personally has taken years to learn my signs and symptoms...when to walk away and calm down. I now have a 16 year old who was just diagnosed with schizo effective disorder (a mix between schizophrenia and bipolar). I was just devastated because I truly don't want him to have to deal with what I have lived with. The only positive part is that I understand what he is going through and can help talk him through what all is going on in his head. The best way that I can describe it is that I feel like I am in a room screaming as loud as I can and no one hears me....and I want to say I love you don't leave me but what comes out is just hatred...If at anytime I can be of help or answer questions please let me know...I hate to hear of anyone suffering from this

wandajane · 12-09-2012, 07:50 PM

Hello Ellen
I understand all to well exactly what you are going through. I myself have a 23 year old daughter who for years fought the diagnosis and treatment. Has she ever participated in any treatment or meds? there is a reason I ask this and it is very important. Also it seems as if the hospital she was in may not have provided the best care for her. Does she have children? I am not trying to pry, but before i speak to much and possibly give wrong advise I want to know how close our situation is.

anneo59 · 08-21-2013, 08:46 AM

Hello, sorry for what everyone is going thru, as we must continue to keep up the good fight, despite our struggles. Good tips many of you all have posted. One of my three grown sons has had lots of issues but now doing better. And my hub has ADHD, which rears its head now and then, and he is under a lot of job and financial stress. And of course, I'm BP, with some other MI issues and a few health concerns. I usually keep going, just like the little energizer bunny, but sometimes I feel like I'm running in circles, and then my batteries just give out. Then gotta pick up where I can. So, I can relate, and am sending warm wishes and prayers everyone's way. And now, before work, I'm gonna get some physical activity and a little fun distraction (music) to get my mind right. But have enjoyed socializing w you all today. Glad I'm here!

Ksman · 08-21-2013, 10:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EllenT

Hi I am new to this forum, and am scared and frustrated. My 22 year old daughter was recently diagnosed as bipolar but she refuses to accept the label, and will not take any medications or see any therapists. thanks

I can relate some too. My son is 25. I recently detailed his experiences under a thread titled "concerned parent".

He hasn't actually been diagnosed as bipolar but he certianly shows many signs. He quit his counseling, won't take medications but is scheduled to see an MD on Friday to rule out allergies or anything else.

He was living on his own and self medicating which created other issues.

Luckily for us he is living with us for now. So we can help guide him through some of this.

I can relate. This is very difficult and frustrating. Especially with no help or guidance from the professionals.

Hang in there.

gruvingal · 08-10-2014, 12:36 PM

I have a son who will be 30 this year on September 5th. He has been addicted to meth since he was 17. I believe he is bi-polar like me but also refuses help. The best advice I can give you is don't enable her. I did this with my son and 11 mos ago he finally stole from me and I haven't spoken to him since. It is good that you don't stick around too long when she is displaying inappropriate behavior. I pray that she will get help! I also pray for you, as a mother, that you can find some peace and happiness in your life!

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